Of Course, Yeah!

Unquenched Consciousness

2010-12-05T10:15:00.000-08:00

A blog exploring the work of Jean Giraud, aka Gir, aka Moebius.

A Moebius Tumblr blog. Moebius and Jodorowsky's Incal Deluxe HC Edition comes out on December 15 for $99. Sorry, kids. Looks like we have to cancel Christmas this year.

$21.95 worth of comics

2010-11-11T09:00:00.000-08:00

It has been quite some time since I have been to a comic shop. The fictional landscapes that I used to visit on the weekly basis are now alien and appear to be impenetrable. What is this One More Day that Spider-man is having with Mary Jane? Didn't we already get past this? Two Batmans on the cover of Batman & Robin # 16? Unthinkable! Looking at all of the Shadowland tie-ins, one can only wish for things to return to a simpler time when EVERYONE knew what face was underneath that Daredevil mask.

Because it has been so long, it only makes sense that I do my best to get caught up as quick as I can with the Marvel Universe I left behind so long ago. This has resulted in me purchasing the following:

Secret Avengers # 6 - $3.99
The Amazing Spider-man # 648 - $3.99
The New Avengers # 6 - $3.99
The Invincible Ironman # 1 - $4.99
Strange Tales II # 2 - $4.99

For $21.95 you get the Espionage Avengers teaming up with Shang Chi, a sub-par new-reader-friendly Spider-man story, the origin of Mandarin, Wolverine fighting a piece of jewelry and Strange Tales. Fraction and the indie comic alumni notwithstanding, things are exactly where they were when I left: mostly boring and drab and not really worth the price of admission. I could probably get these comics for free if I tried hard enough(so that I could keep with "MY" Universe, at the very least), but I am not sure that it's even worth the time or effort.

All in all, I thoroughly enjoyed the Invincible Ironman Annual and Strange Tales, but damn, I really wish I could get that remaining $11.97 back.

You know what?

2008-07-24T09:27:00.000-07:00

I kind of miss you guys. Just a little bit. That's all.

A bunch of super hero comics I bought in 2008, part 2

2008-04-08T18:09:00.000-07:00

What kinds of crazy super heroic comic books could possibly make me come about my blogging hibernation? Well, I think its safe to say that we all know the answer to that one question, now don't we.

Secret Invasion # 1. Yes. It is true. I have just read Secret Invasion # 1 and now I'm gonna throw a bunch of hate all over it 'cause how we do when we do it. Where can we start on this? From what you heard (if you have not had the pleasure of reading it) its got all kinds of your typical Brian Michael Bendis speechifying in the word balloons. And of course, its completely foreign and alien to those who have not been following along this little ride that Marvel's Golden Boy has taken the Marvel U on. This things that people say are unfalse! You can't just pick up the Bible and start reading at Revelations, my friends! You gotta get on at Genesis and see how that shit rides.

Luckily, I'm one of those morons that starting reading this Marvel Bible at the beginning. I may have skipped a couple chapters of Numbers and Deuterononmy(sp?), but I got the main picture all mapped out in my head. Something has been amiss for awhile now and today is the day that we take a moment to sort this crap out.

Having read this first issue I have decided that this isn't a very good book. Why?

Bendis can't do melodramatic. He just can't. His forte is the half-assed comedic scripting that he culled from Aaron Sorkin's assorted TV dramas and faux-cheekiness of the WB's Tuesday night line up, with the "realistic" stutter of some guy named David Mamet. Its HBO Sopranos Cool disseminated through the likes Hank Pym and Luke Cage. Every character is smart and funny, except for those who TRY to be smart and funny, only to their own mid-fight embarassment. More often than not, it is pretty damn boring.

From the moment that Iron Man opens his stupid mouth on the first page, to the shocking reveal at the end, everything comes with a self-imposed weight that does not deliver in any kind of convincing manner whatsoever. When Tony Stark tells us readers that he's telling us the biggest secret there is in the world, the eyes only roll.

We've seen this all before. It was called Civil War and it had heroes fighting other heroes. Throwing in the added bonus that some of these heroes are really just aliens in disguise makes it a little more interesting. I just can't help but think that its a premise that is not in capable hands. And that feeling seems to permeate alot of what Marvel has been putting out the past two years. These are great ideas that I could do a million times better. And I'm a horrible writer.

But I'll be around until the end, if only to give me something to hate about.

Now the new All Star Superman # 10? That's a great book. Everything that Secret Invasion # 1 did wrong, All Star Superman # 10 did right. Each page is packed with something new. We aren't just flipping through a comic book about Superman, we're turning a new corner with him. Its all ground that we have traveled before. We just have a better guide than we did last time. We have a writer that is able to make us stop and look at everything differently. This is, without a doubt, a Superman tale that will be remembered for a long, long time by fans of both super hero and non-super hero genres.

But I'm feeling like you all knew that, right? Right.

A bunch of super hero comics I bought in 2008, part 1

2008-02-20T20:31:00.000-08:00

Just got home early from school where I took an algebra test that I definitely did not do good on. Why? Because I'm part lazy slacker, part someone that gets sick and missed a night or two of class. Its funny, because I was making algebra my dirty little slizz-zut at the beginning of the semester until I somehow lost my way. Who would have thought that Spencer D. Carnage, Casual Marvel Comic Book Blogger, would ever be somewhat decent at trinomials? Its that "Solve for x and graph it out: 3x + 20 is greater than or equal to 9x - 2 + x" shit that gets me. And this is ELEMENTARY algebra we're talking about. What happens when you get into ADVANCED algebra? Does it compare to a newbie trying to jump head first in the murky, continuity-shark filled waters of the 2008 publishing schedule of mainstream superhero comics?

The answer to that question is perverse and often baffling.

Let's start with Uncanny X-men # 495, shall we? Yes. Yes we shall. Its been a long tiiiiiiiiiime since I've read an issue of Uncanny X-men. The last issue I read had Vulcan flying in space and taking way too long to disable some Shi'ar starships. It was one of those one-off issues that Brubaker seems to do so well with in Captain America. Unfortunately for my $2.99, it didn't quite work out for Vulcan as it did for Nomad so I stopped reading. From what I heard, that decision was a good one because that space shit was whatevs. Then the Messiah CompleX came along and I still kept my distance. Now that its over, I thought I would jump on with Uncanny X-men # 495.

If you want my two cents, Emma and Scott taking their post-crossover honeymoon in the Savage Land is exactly what an X-men comic needs to get me to jump back off.

Uh.......whatthefuckamIreading? The leader of the X-men and the White Queen running from dinosaurs while exchanging meaningful glances.

(That big long space is me folding my arms and shaking my head with disdain through my computer at the people who created this comic.)

That's okay, though. Bru wants to channel Chris Claremont at his worst, go for it. I'm good. As long as I have one more issue of Astonishing X-men left, I can wait six more months before I get my fix of X-goodness. I think you all know what I mean, right? Despite the wait, this last arc of Astonishing X-men is great. It got bumpy for a few moments there, but as soon as they got into space, it was all systems go. And if we have to wait six months to get that grand finale issue from Whedon, Cassady & Co., you won't hear me complain. It'll be a shame to see this creative team go, but it was worth the wait.

Next, I'm going to talk about Captain America # 34. In case you haven't heard, that's motherfuggin' Bucky under that new Cap costume, son! That's right! If you've been avoiding spoilers, you're prolly all jacked up with rage right now! You're thinking "What's the deal, Spencer? Normally you're all "OMG SPOILERZ!" when you're ruining the comics I haven't read. When that happens, I just leave and surf for pRonz on the interwubs. But this?! This is too much!!! Its so bad th-that........deep breath......I'M NEVER GOING TO READ YOUR BLOG EVER AGAIN."

That's okay, because I'll probably give up blogging after this post, so I think I can live with that.

So yeah. Bucky is Cap. And Cap is back. And Spencer? Spencer's yawning. Why is Spencer yawning? Spencer is yawning because it looks not much has changed in the world of Captain America. The Red Skull is still around.... Some of those new baddies like Dr. Faustus and Arnim Zola that were re-introduced 15 to 20 some odd issues ago are hanging on his arm... And the new Cap is sent out to take on AIM agents trying to steal money from Wall Street. Talk about a shitty ass debut. I get what's going on. Iron Man wants Cap-Bucky to start out slow. Stretch out the ol' chain mail before they throw him at some Skrulls. I get it. It was just a boring issue. The biggest threat in this issue was Sub-prime Mortgages. Sorry, friend, but I already faced that threat two years ago. I'm over getting my ass handed to me by Sub-Prime Mortgage Lenders. Its time for some new enemies to step up already. I've been gone a long time, but this makes me glad that I stayed away. Sorry, Jason. I tried. I really did.

Last but not least.... New Avengers Annual # 2. Yeah. Fuckin' Bendis. Figured I'd drop in and see what's up with that science experiment that I got going on with Bendis. Its the one where I remember how much I loved his Daredevil, Alias and early Powers and hope that he FINALLY ironed out the kinks in his more recent work. Not too mention, get a gauge for what's going in my beloved Marvel U seeing how he's one of the guys in charge.

Guess what, readers? Its still not good. Did I spoil that one, too? I figured I must be the last DECENT blogger who is still dipping their toes in that stagnating pool, so I guess its only fair that I share.

The book opens up with the Hood and crew going BACK to Tigra's place to get the Feminists and Tigra fans upset by having him punk her once again. Instead of beating the crap out of her and videotaping it in some kind of shitty fashion that ended with Bendis patting himself on the back at Newsarama for handling a scene like that with such class, she caves and gives up the goods without a fight. The goods that I'm talking about is the location of where the New Avengers are hiding. Can't blame her, because there is the Hood with a gun to her head again, but with like.....8 dudes in the shadows looking all scary.

Now that the Hood knows where the New Avengers are, he takes to their front door. He's not gonna punk out like Iron Man and bring in Brother Voodoo. Nah, he's just gonna jump into that faux looking run down building that used to belong to the Sorceror Supreme which will soon become a Starbucks and start punching around until he hits Wolverine in his Canadian face. But first?

Well, let's set the scene for those who haven't had the chance to waste their money on this issue. Before you storm into the good guys' hangout, you gotta pump everyone up. You know, cheerlead a little bit. But it ain't the kind of cheerleading it would expect from a team leader. No. This one involves everyones standing around like a bad ass, posing for their picture in the Official Marvel Handbook. After doing that for a few minutes, some numbnuts Thor villian can't stand the suspense. What's he gonna say? Naturally, it goes something like this:

Piledriver, the numbnuts Thor villian, stands there looking all bad azz with his arm crossed, as you can see by his decision to replace his standard villian costume shirt with a wife beater. Yeah, bro.... You fuckin' rip. You wanna punch some good guys? Good thing you wore that wife-beater, dude, 'cuz there's a bunch of super hero bitches in there that need to get bitch slapped.

Let's do this!

Piledriver says to the guy in charge(that's the Hood), "So What'cha Think, Hood?" See, Piledriver, he don't fuck around. He's thinking about how they're gonna stomp them Neg Reg heroes! He's fired UP! and ready to GO! Like the man said.....

So What'cha Think, Hood?

(anticipation)

(followed by more anticipation)

(its only seconds, but damn, I wanna crack heads so every second of anticipation just gets me more riled up, anticipation)

(god, the anticipation is killing, anticipation)

(fuck me, I wanna punch a Spider-man in his face, I'm so anticipating right now, anticipating anticipation)

(followed by more anticipation)

(what's that crazy new villian mastermind on the block gonna say, anticipation)

(in case you're wondering, the question is "So What'cha Think, Hood?" anticipation)

(....-tion)

Fuck it, here's the panel:

*blink, blink*

Fuck you, Bendis.

Don't waste my time with your shit anymore. I really don't give a shit what the Hood thinks about the music industry. The only thing worst than being a poor man's Aaron Sorkin is being the Comic Book version of a poor man's Aaron Sorkin. I want my heroes and villians to awesome. Not cheeky. AWESOME.

Is that too much?

Color me unsurprised because the rest of this comic was a big pile of crap. Like, all over. Just stupid. At one part Spidey swings in and takes Luke and Jessica's baby so he can get the baby to safety, but does so without really explaining why he's doing it, sending Luke into his typical Angry Black Guy routine that Bendis believes works so well for his character. More yawns.

Them are the super hero comics I bought and read. There was also Astro City: Dark Age # 4, but I haven't gotten to that one yet. Next, I'll ramble on about a few of the indie comics that I bought, like '76 and Pax Romana(which ruled). I totally forgot about Fell so that will have to wait. Set your RSS Feeds to Of Course, Yeah and it'll be like Christmas in March when I update this again.

Toodles!

Its not you, its me

2008-02-10T20:10:00.001-08:00

Howdy. I'm thinking about buying comics again. Why? Because, dude! There's Skrulls everywhere!

Actually, that's not right. If anything, I'll probably stay far, far away from anything Skrull-related unless it involves the Immortal Iron Fist. Ok, that's not right either. Being me, I'll pick up the main series AT LEAST just to keep my hate rate going. But that's not what I'm here to talk about.

I'm here to talk about comics that I should be picking up. And I'm turning to you guys for some help. I'm looking at picking up 5 comics next weekend when I go to the comic shop and 1 trade. Which comics should those 5 comics + 1 trade be? Recommend me anything. I don't even care if its DC. If you say that the Trials Of Shazam is really good and you make your point convincing enough, I'll buy it. Ok, that's a lie. But if you push for Ennis's Dan Dare, you might have a new blogging buddy to talk about the next issue.

I'm looking for anything. Something new. If you're a semi-regular reader here, then you understand what I like and don't like. At least, enough for you to be some what on point what interests me. And maybe, just maybe, whatever you pick for me to buy, I'll blog about. No promises there just because I'm horrible at promising things, but if you suggest, then I should at least run my big mouth about it.

So list 5 single issues that came out in the past month or two and 1 trade and I'll narrow it down to what sounds good either by picking the titles randomly from a hat or putting up one of those polling things. Either way, I'm feeling that I need some comics back in my life so what better way for me to start by turning to you guys and girls for a suggestion. So comment away!

Marvel Solicitations for March

2007-12-18T14:54:00.000-08:00

Well, since I'm here and Newsrama has the solicitations up for Marvel Comics that are coming out in March, I figured....what the fuck, huh? Let's take a look at a few that caught my eye for one reason or another..

Now what the hell is up with Hulk's hand around Iron Man's neck? I am a horrible artist and I can totally draw the Hulk choking Iron Man with more talent that Mr. Nord is showing here. Seriously, what the shit are we looking at?

That guy on the right is the Ultimate version of Stryfe, right? I bet you take off his mask and he looks all fuggin' bad azz like this:

Kirkman is the one writing this comic, right? So I'm not all that far off.

March is a bad month for Spider-man covers. And that's fucking Phil Jiminez and Tony Harris that you're looking at, being all shitty and what not.

This cover makes me want to go back and play some Rifts. You know, dust off my old Tattooed True Atlantean Glitter Boy pilot and take on some Coalition SAMAS in the radioactive ruins of Old Minnesota with nothing but a Juicer Merc and D-Bee Ley Line Walker backing my shit up. If roleplaying games have their say, the future is gonna be awesome. Know what I'm sayin'!?

So Captain Marvel is back and apparently Wolverine or D-Man are making an appearance in the last issue of a mini-series that I MIGHT try to convince a friend to buy so I can borrow it 12 months after the fact. Or should I just skip it altogether? Its hard to decide when it comes to CAPTAIN MARVEL.

Hitch sucks now. Proof? Ultimates Volume Two. This picture is probably the best I have seen of his FF work, but the rest of it is just one big ugly mess of realistic super hero crap.

Bagley, you traitorous son of a bitch! Not even an New Warriors cover before you leave? 'Tis heresy!

Anyone following this? Read the first issue and decided to wait for the trade. Is it good? Bad? Does it help you lure indie comic reading hipster girls into bed?

Have they revealed who Night Thrasher is yet? If so, please spoil it for me. Or at least spoil what the message boards are guessing who it is. Cuz in this picture, its looking like some jack ass of a honky and NOT my man, Dwayne Taylor.

Dude. Know why you're all sad, Nova? Because you're dicking around in space when you really should be back on Earth, banging a hot ass Atlantean babe named Namorita and giving Speedball noogies. But nooooooooooo..... someone had to go into space while the rest of the Warriors were playing grab ass with explosive villians in Connecticut, causing people like me to turn my back on comics forever(12-18 months tops!)...

Thanks a lot, Rich Ryder!

And that's all I got for right now. There are a bunch of other covers with X-men standing around all bad ass and She-Hulk punching stuff while her big ol' boobs make your mouth salivate. The usual.

Soon...

2007-12-18T14:45:00.000-08:00

Tales To Admonish # 28

2007-09-17T21:48:00.000-07:00

So I was at this party Saturday and I'm outside hanging out when I hear two people, a guy and a girl, talking about the Transformers Movie so naturally I'm all "totally. And another thing..." followed by an introduction of my esteemed self. We start talking, to which I discover the girl, whose cute, reads comics so I decide its time to test the nature of the relationship between her and her male companion by making some well-placed crack about how they make a cute couple and she's all "noooooo, not even, nuh uh, never. we're just friends."

A'ight, a'ight. Let's do this!

We start talking and she's all convinced that Alan Moore is a satanist and I'm no, girl, he's a wiccan or quite possibly a warlock(maybe both!), I can't remember correctly and really, you should read Promethea because its good, even for all the magical wankery. And I'm cracking jokes and she's laughing and does that thing where a girl touches your arm that gets you thinking things like "I'm so gonna score a mad fat make out sesh in the bathroom before the night's over!" and keep on with my bad ass self. I mean, a cute girl that likes comics AND my idiotic jokes? That's like rolling a natural twenty.

We chat some more and its all good in the hood, y'all until she mentions how she really wants to read the copy of Lost Girls that her boyfrie-WAIT, WHAT?!?!?!?! Boy-friend!??!?! "Whatever you want to call him. Its complicated." Indeed it is, sister. Especially with a Bee Eff that bought Lost Girls. But N E WAYS I need some more water, because see, I'm the designated driver and therefore I have to drink lots of water in order to maintain some kind of illusion that we're all here for the same thing which is to consume beverages, so I'm gonna go and get me some more water and quite possibly some chips right before I stop in at the john. I'll brb so we can continue this nice friendly chat. Upon removing me from the situation, my friend is all "Dude, I came out to say what up but I saw you talking to that cute girl and she's kind of red head too, so maybe what they say about red head's being extinct by 2025 isn't really true, thanks to the pimping efforts of the Spencer D. Carnage!!! Yeah!!! High five to Propagating the Ginger Species!!!!!!"

Yeah, ummm...no. she's got a boyfriend. She also mentioned that she has crippling social anxiety except when she's drinking. Nexties! And what was nexties, you ask? Nexties was a girl that I started talking to about Broken Social Scene that had MILD potential despite not being a fan of the comics however she stunk up the bathroom right before it was my turn to use it so I nixed that shit. At a party. In LA. Who does THAT?! Plus, she was kind of lame, but whatevs.

I don't know about you, but my life in general is way more interesting when there isn't some uppity girlfriend and/or wife in the way, damaging the fundamental nature of my character. I find that I become a much more entertain read.

Next issue: Spencer tries to sleep with not one, but two 19 year college girls with the same name! And whose that on the cover of the local free newspaper? Its Secret Wars! Also, the villiany of the Mortgage Industry.....REVEALED!!!!

Do you still think of me?

2007-09-10T18:07:00.000-07:00

I've been gone. I'm sorry. Don't think that I have forgotten about all of you because I have not. Whenever I pass by a large group of strangers, I stop and think.....some where in that crowd there could be a lurker of Of Course, Yeah! That man with the Ice Cream Cone.....did he enjoy my review of House Of M # 7? That woman with the baby stroller....did she link my Night Thrasher = Badical post to wikipedia? And that forlorn teenage boy in the back with the hat....am I on HIS blogroll? I have not given up on you so don't give up on me. I'm just in a DSL-less, work-filtered world is all. Oh, and comics and I broke up, too.

It started as a little tiff over something stupid. You know how it goes. It starts with the nitpicking that goes into bickering, followed by a full blown knock down drag out fight that ends with you picking your copies of the Watchmen and X-tinction Agenda trades up off of the street. It was all Iron Fist's fault, really. Trying to reconcile Marvel's use of his old costume in New Avengers to his newer costume in his own solo book seemed like a harmless conversation. A little nitpicky yes, but so what. Sure enough, the topic of where the first 6 issues of Iron Fist take place in relation to the New Avengers book itself came up and that always gets ugly. Throw in World War Hulk into the mix and the next thing you know, there's furniture being aggressively moved from its designated place. We kissed and made up, of course, but I was already flipping through old trades from other companies. It was only when my comics caught me looking through the DC Solicitations that the decision was final. Comics and I had to call it quits. Being a broke ass loser doesn't really help the situation, either. Dating comics can be expensive as I'm sure you all know. As you read this, you might think that everything's going great between you and comics, but when this economy turns and you have to start tightening your belt, comics is long gone before you can even say "Excelsior!" (Whore.)

But its okay. I've been managing. With Comics out of the picture, the Band and I have decided that maybe its time that we become more than just friends. Lately, we've been spending a lot of time together. Just went to Vegas last friday. That's twice in one month! We were supposed to spend saturday night in Tahoe, but we had to cancel last minute. Its been fun. The Band likes to drink a lot so we've been hitting a lot of bars together. We've toasted to our bright future in just about every shitty dive bar from here in Ventura County all the way down to San Diego. Don't get me wrong, its not all sunshine and rainbows. There was a little incident with a certain "Sparky" but I tossed his ass and the Band and I were back on our merry way. Look, here are some pictures of Band and I hanging out. I'm one with the spirit fingers.

Aren't we just adorable together?

Really, though.

I'm way busy, son. Work, school and music. That's all I really do. I scaled back on buying comics just because of the money I've had to sink into gas, Taco Bell and tutition. I started a pull list in June only to cancel it in July. Playing the 20 to 30 some odd shows we had this past summer was rough on the wallet, especially when you're driving 2 hours one way, 2 or 3 nights a week. Throw on top of that the fall semester at school and I is brizzoke. So something had to give and that was me buying comics. Considering that I was feeling kind of so so about what was being put out, in addition to the number of times this past year I stopped buying them, it wasn't that big of a decision to make.

Now, normally I would have at least blogged about all this to keep you kids in the loop. I stare at a computer screen 8 hours a day, bored senseless, might as well get my blog on, right? Somewhere between May and July, the work place decided that Blogger was a "Social Networking and Personal Site" that needed to blocked. Therefore, it was. Don't worry, I still read your guys blogs, thanks to the trusty Bloglines. I just can't comment on them. And you're all doing a fine, fine job. I would blog from home, however I'm running the Dial Up right now. And why is that?

Well, DSL is not available in my neighborhood. Across the main street, you can get it, but on this side of Madera Road, never gonna get it, gonna get it! Cable Modem was an option, however we were getting our cable TV for free and signing up for Cable Modem meant having to start paying for the free TV as well. And once you start paying for the basic cable you've been stealing for 3 years, you might as well hook yo' self up with HBO, am I right? Now we're talking like $120 extra a month! In case you don't know, California is expensive. So instead of cutting into our drinking money, we just dealt with the dial up. And when you're on dial up, you just check your MySpace and then you're out because if you're going to be waiting 10 minutes for an image to load, its gonna be of pre-pubescent girls giving you the MySpace angles! (Don't act like you don't do it!) Not too long ago, I finally was all "f dis shizz!" and told the roomies that we gotta man up, because man.....there's a whole world of YouTube and BitTorrenting that lies right outside the door, we just don't have the right keys! And I want those keys! I bit the bullet, called the Cable Company and told them, yo dwag, we are ready to be your customers! I will pay for Rock Of Love and Man Vs Wild, just gimme that high speed cable! I had the day scheduled off of work and everything! Plus, I just gave up on comics! That's like an extra $75 a week!

But then the mortgage industry took a dump.

So help me Baby Jesus, if one of you overstated your income or signed up for a PayOption, only to foreclose 12 to 18 months later, I'm gonna come over to your newly rented apartment and piss all over your back issues of 52. Thanks to you, the economy's all messed the fugged up and I'm hanging in limbo, waiting for the Axe to drop in what will be the inevitable "down sizing." All in all, we is still on the Dial Up and I'm probably still not gonna do much blogging from home, because well......them MySpace photo comments on Tila Tequila's new profile pic ain't gonna add themselves!

So there is my long winded explanation as to why I haven't been blogging. But don't worry. I'll probably be losing my job here sometime this week and considering how GREAT the job market is here in Southern California right now, I'll have PLENTY of time to blag about whatevs. If anything, I can just scan old Thor comics and be like "ZOMG!!11 LOL!!111!!! HE SAID FORSOOTH!!!!11111!!!!! ROFLMAOKIZHABN!!!!!1111" That seems to work out great for some other folks. In the meantime, feel free to leave a comment and I'll definitely get back to yous. I appreciate the love I've gotten in the past few weeks which is what prompted me to write this. I'm sorry I don't have any opinion on New Warriors, Jon, but I'm pretty sure its continued its slow down hill decline. Or maybe not. Comment up in this Blog and let me know!

Until we meet again!

The Wolverine I Know And Love

2007-07-25T15:14:00.000-07:00

Look at that.

Wolverine, stumbling home drunk, wearing a cowboy hat, and singing some stupid song to himself while smoking. Now there is a sight that I miss. Wait, we don't have a can opener for those beers, Wolverine! How we gonna fix THAT?!

Who knew Improvisation was one of Wolverine's mutant powers?

New Warriors # 2

2007-07-19T12:28:00.000-07:00

Issue 2 is out and my hope for this series being decent is dwindling. And why is that?

OMG!!! SPOILERZ!!!

So far, two former mutants have already joined up with the New Warriors with a third one being courted. The lovable loser, Beak, from Grant Morrison's New X-men run and Jubilee. If you look hard enough, you could make argument for a possible 4th as the one shot of the full team shows a man with spiky hair and a scarf around his neck. The recently de-powered Chamber, perhaps? Its interesting to think that the mutants, or ex-mutants, would be so concerned with the Registration Act that haunts the Marvel U. I am inclined to guess that maybe the Registration Act mirrors the Mutant Registration Act all too well and if it is not stopped, the always looming menace of a Sentinel policed future is right around the corner. However, I find it hard for a bunch of Ex-mutants to be concerned about a future scenario that they have been blacklisted from. Grevioux can definitely pursue that angle, but I don't know if I'll be buying it. Another reason for the M-Day victims to take up the cause could be the simple reason of getting their powers back. The celebrity mutant life is a sexy one. Now that these characters are so last minute, they are latching on to the next best thing, which appears to be technology-powered super heroics. Feels like Vh1's Celebreality, really..

Idiotic metaphors aside, this book is still standing on the fence for me as a super hero comic. Having an unreasonable soft spot in my heart for Nicieza's and Bagley's work on the first volume, its safe to say that I'm probably going to be a little unfair. Its still light on the action, much like the first issue. Mystery abounds in regards to what these New Warriors are all about but none of it is particularly thrilling. And the detective work put into solving the mystery of the New Warriors by Wolverine comes in the form of deduction via putting his thumb up against a televised broadcast of one of the female Warriors in action. At this point, there's just a whole bunch of grand standing against the Registration with a little bit of "not being a mutant is hard" going on. A more hardline, in-your-face approach would do this book tremendous justice. By issue 2 of the first volume of New Warriors, they had already defeated Terrax and went up against a gang of thugs equipped with fancy AIM weaponry. This time around? The return of Jubilee.

Some where out there, a message board thread is rustling with cries of celebration. Thanks, Joe Q.

October Solicitations for Marvel Comics

2007-07-18T10:43:00.000-07:00

So the October Solicitations are here courtesy of various different new sites and today we're going to look at a few covers that stuck for good and/or bad reasons. Its lazy blogging, but its all I got right now.

Let's begin!

< INTERNET OUTRAGE >OMG, WTFers!!!!! Pron swiping!!!!!?!< /INTERNET OUTRAGE >

There is this whole post inside of me about how they need to bring back the old school covers with kinds of crazy captions promising things that would never ever happen. Joe Quesada's name comes up no where in this prospective post. I think you can understand why.

This is the kind of cover that makes you hate the art inside because they most likely do not compare in the slighest.

I'm not much of a fan for modernized updates of classic stories, because they absolutely have no bearing on current continuity and if there's ever a reason to read Marvel Comics, its so I can go on about which superhero registering this week and who's sleeping with a skrull, but.....Eric Canete just might make me break that habit. Plus, Joe Casey. He's damn good as of late.

Ugh. That's all kinds of not-good. I'll take the cover with my dwag JRJR, thank you!

I'm boss-y! I'm the first girl to scream on a track! I switched up the beat of the drum! That's right i brought all the boys to the yard! And that's right, i'm the one that's tattooed on his arm!

I'm boss-y!

I think that Sean Phillips' talent is being put to great misuse with these stupid zombie books. Agree? Disagree? Comment below, suckas!

Have we finally out 90's the 90's? Yes, I do believe we have. By Mr. Bendis, no doubt. That is something, isn't it.

I was stoked for this when they announced it way back when. Having finally read some Jonathan Lethem and Farel Dalrymple in the interim, I'm twice oas stoked. Do people say that anymore, "stoked?" Or am I, like, totally showing my age? Is 28 old enough to start doing that?

God, I hope to heck that they don't bring back the 2nd version of Night Thrasher's armor with those 80's shoulder pads and ugly hockey mask helmet!

...

Why are you looking at me like that?

What's wrong with these two covers? Let's ask Speedball himself!

Say what you want, but New Warriors vol 1, issues 1 through 25 are the bible when it comes to doing Speedball right. If anything, they could have just shunted him over to Cable & Deadpoll and GLI, but no. Us Marvel fans have to be dumb about things like FUN.

Something is not quite right with us fans.

Stu-pid! I mean, really? Is this the best you can do, Mr. Silvestri?

Salvadore Larocca has greatly improved, IMO. I mean, even when she's all effed up, Storm is still rocking that ghetto booty. S'up, girl! Holla at yer boy!

I finally jumped on the bandwagon for this book. Great stuff. Who would of thought the Multiple Man would have been so damn interesting?

I'm digging on some Skottie Young lately. The dude's got illin' skills and he's funny, too! I think I'm man-crushing.

For some strange reason, I want to pick up New Excalibur and read it. Am I missing something? Is this flying under my radar? Am I so eager for Chris Claremont to be awesome again that I'll entertain notions of enjoying a book whose lead characters consist of Captain Britain, the Juggernaut and Dazzler?

The only David Lapham work I have read outside of Stray Bullets and Murder Me Dead is his Daredevil/Punisher work, which was absolutely fantastic. From what I've heard, some of his other stuff, specifically his DC work, not so much. I think I'll defer to the internet on this one before I dive in. I mean, if the internet was right about cats being hilarious, I'm sure they'll be spot on about this as well. Right?

And we'll finish this up by saying Criminal is a great comic book that deserves to be in your long box. 'Nuff said!

Just sayin'

2007-07-03T11:29:00.000-07:00

I called dibs on coining the term "Skrullektra"! The proof is in the pudding, my friends. Google "Skrullektra" and check the dates. We can wait.

Looking at DC & Marvel, but through Octopi Eyes!

2007-06-28T14:24:00.000-07:00

You remember how not too long ago I was all hating on comics for being crappy? Well, they're still mostly crappy, and thank god for that because without crappy comics I don't think any of us would ever have a reason to go online, but I'm finding my distaste for them going on a seasonal decline. Why? Beats the hell out of me, really. Since I won't have the funds until friday to purchase new vittles for my comic book reading appetite, I've been going through some old trades to get my jones on. I can't think of a better time and place than now to talk about them so let's do just that!

JSA: The Golden Age
As you all know, I am not what you call a 'DC Guy.' When I think of DC comics, I think of playing peanuckle with my grandma while sipping tea on lazy sunday afternoon. Its great and all, but I'd rather be doing other things. That's just me, though. The good thing about JSA: The Golden Age is that it is the DCU straying away from that middle-of-the-road super hero business and getting down and dirty with it. Its got that edginess laid out in front of you, but with a touch of class that usually escapes most Marvel comics. Using the Red Scare as a backdrop, James Robinson crafted a well thought out suspense thriller that works as a great send off to the bygone era of the 40's and 50's mystery men. Re-reading this makes me wish that there was a comic where Alan Scott punchs Hal Jordan AND Guy Gardner in their stomachs to show the world how sissy they really are when compared to the Tower Of A Man That Is Alan Scott The Original Green Lantern, big puffy sleaves and all. Alan Scott is the type of guy that will be 80+ years old, sitting in a wheelchair, talking about how he could whoop your uppity 20 something year old punk ass. And he probably would, too. Alan Scott is not one to be fussed with. When I first read this a year or two ago, it actually made me want to catch up on the JSA and see how things were going for them in the current DCU. Maybe one of these days I will. Until then, I can look at this Elseworlds Tale and say "Me and Hourman have something in common: we've both done drugs!" Not even reading Amazing Spider-man can make me say that. And that's something.

Fantastic Four: 1 2 3 4
The only FF comics I own are Civil War Tie-ins or are drawn by Mark Bagley. I like the FF, but I just haven't read the right FF story to get me completely hooked. I know, I know, apparently John Byrne is where its at with this book. Enough already. I got this trade because, well....its Grant Morrison and Jae frickin' Lee! And its gooooood. Dark, moody, and scary as all hell at points. Morrison takes one of the brightest, shiniest super hero teams and puts them up against the ropes while Lee illustrates it all for us to see in usual dark and moody style, which works out great to accent to the feeling of DOOM hanging over our heroes' heads. Through the eyes of Grant Morrison, you get a real sense of what makes these characters tick. Its a psychological thriller that only lets up when the good guys finally beat on the bad guy. Its not enough to make want to buy everything FF yesterday, but it helps push me in the right direction.

Kingdom Come
I don't know what's so bad about Alex Ross. Sure, he's all antiquated in ways regarding the DCU and the only new changes that he acknowledges are those that lean towards the ones we see made in Kingdom Come, but brothers and sisters.....the dude can paint. And sure, sometimes the painting comes off as stiff and doesn't explode at you from the page like a Kirby panel would, but that's 90% of the guys working in the industry right now. Regardless, y'all got your opinions and I got mine. Let's move on, shall we?

I like Kingdom Come because I like Alternate Futures. They're fun. Its always interesting to see what time can do to our beloved heroes and villians. What do you think Spider-man's gonna be like when he's older? Let's go to the future and see! You ever think Wolverine will just keep on living while the rest of the X-men die, and if so, will he be all emo sad about it? Let's go to the future and see! Now I can agree with you that most stories that jump forward in time are usually piles of crap. But we're talking about super hero comics here. They're all usually are just big piles of crap. Knocking the premise just because a writer doesn't know what to do with it is unfair and childish.

What Kingdom Come is, is a love letter to DC. Apparently DC has a lot comics that function on this same kind of level, its just that Kingdom Come is doing it like Woah. Kingdom Come works so well as a love letter from Mark Waid and Alex Ross to the DCU that, that love is so great and exponentially infecting that it even transferred itself on to me. That's right! Kingdom Come knocked a little bit of ice off of my cold, cold Marvel heart. I even gave my friend Ryan, a DC fan, a hug after reading this. Its interesting when you compare Kingdom Come to what's going on right now in the current DCU. Not that I'm reading a lot of DC comics, but by the look of things, its getting pretty bad. If I must say, its starting to look like Marvel comics stayed over for the weekend and left the DCU with nothing to show for it except a heaping dose of STDs. If the current issue of the Flash is a clear cut indicator of what DC is doing as a whole(which it seems it has been the past week), DC and Fun had themselves a little bit of a falling out. I thought One Year Later was our way of getting away from all that negativity, but it looks like they're still knee deep in it over there. Sorry, DC fans, but it seems that the Marvel way of doing things is so damn lucrative and appealing that the guys in charge are trying to steal our thunder! We're just better looking, is all! Don't believe me? Go check out the Bendis Board! Nothing but 20 to 30 something year old hotties posting about New Avengers and Veronica Mars! LOL!

8 things

2007-06-26T10:43:00.000-07:00

I just got tagged! Twice! If this was a prayer chain email for some kid in Memphis with cancer, you both would be marked as spammers! Since this is a meme where I talk about me, s'all good in the hood, G.

First things first:

- I have to post these rules before I start.
- I have to tell you eight facts about myself.
- I have to tag eight people to participate.
- I'm supposed to leave a comment telling them they're tagged and to read my blog.
- And the tagees need to write their own blog post, telling us eight things and posting the rules.

Let's do it to it..

"What up, Spiggs."

I have all kinds of stupid nick names. Spiggs. Spiggity. Spence-diggity. Splinter. Speenis. Ol' Dirty Spencer. ODS. Spencedizzle my nizzle. Spencer Con Carne. The Redheaded Stepchild. Howdy Doody. Spencer Carnage is a play off of my last name which I jokingly gave to myself one night when I was skateboarding with my friend Tony. 8 years later, I use it to blog. About comic books.

"Hi. We're Cain Marko from Simi Valley and this song is called Stab Their Eyes."

I have played in a string of really bad bands with equally bad names taken from various pop culture references. Band names I have used are "The Decepticons", "Eeyore", "Cain Marko" and now "Secret Wars." One of those bands covered Body Count's Cop Killer. If I ever get around to starting a sissy rock band, it'll probably be called something like "Westchester, NY."

"Do you work for Fed Ex? Cuz you got a nice package."

I was onced "pranked" on an episode of Girls Behaving Badly by a girlfriend who sent me on my day off to pick up some tickets for the Weakerthans from a friend of hers. While waiting outside a store this "friend" worked at, an old lady with a walker dropped her purse, which I immediately picked up for her. When I bent over to pick it up, she started hitting on me, commenting on my butt and "package." Her grand daughter(played by Shondrella Avery, known to the world at large as LaFawnduh from Napoleon Dynamite) than came up and started berating me about the conversation her Grannie and I just had. Still holding the purse, I just kept saying "I'm just trying to give her back her purse." At that point it was obvious that the "grandmother" was a younger woman wearing a wig, however I was completely baffled as to what was really going on and could only repeat the phrase "I'm just trying to give her back her purse" over and over Seconds later, cameras came out from every where and everyone said 'you've been pranked!' After that, they had me reshoot my reactions, complete with improv dancing and everything. The girlfriend and I both got paid 50 bucks each. I have never seen the episode myself but my friend did and he said I was awesome on it. It was probably one of the most surreal experiences I have ever had.

"Fail!"

I didn't graduated high school on time. Why? Because I ditched! A whole lot! What was I doing when I was ditching? Skateboarding, drinking, and playing the Wildstorm CCG game. In the 12th grade. True story. In a panic, I approached the two classes that I was really messing up in and asked how I could pass. They said to show up for the finals and pass and you're okay. I was going to, however I slept in the day of the final because I went to see my absolute favorite band, AVAIL, play 2 hours away the night before. And you wonder why I like edgey Marvel comics over my dad's DC drivel? Its because I'm all effed up!

"That's supposed to look like Spider-man?"

I'm semi-artistically inclined. My whole life, I've been able to draw. Not very well. Had I nurtured the skill at an early age, I'd could of been the next Rob Liefeld, selling Lee Jeans to your ass right now. Instead, I wasted most of my life getting drunk and reading comics, picking up the pencil for 1 to 2 hours every six months. I have taken a few art classes at the community college level, but could never muster up the drive to do anything outside of the assigned work. Last summer, I told myself that I am going to have a comic out within the next five years with my name on it, one way or another. Putting my free time that I have at work to good use, I have burned through a few books on penciling and inking by Klaus Jansen and Dick Giordiano, and the semi-decent collection of Drawing Tips from various pros that Wizard puts out. Right now, I'm working through Joe Kubert's Superheroes: Joe Kubert's Wonderful World Of Comics. I understand that one has to draw from real life, which I do on occassion, these books really just help me to learn basic rules as well as different ways of solving problems such as "how am I gonna draw this nose?" To show my newfound dedication to drawing, I even set up an art table in my room to be used at night and on weekends. It currently functions as a makeshift table, drowning in clothes and comic books. At this point, the best picture I have managed to draw is one of the Swamp Thing hanging out with a cat, which was inspired by a post from Mike Sterling's Progressive Ruin about that exact same thing.

"Cheaters never prosper"

I once plagarized the introduction to the section devoted to Greek Gods in the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons Legends & Lore handbook for a paper on mythology in high school. Needless to say, I got an A.

"Sorry, dude can't do it. Gotta mandate with Tony tonight."

When we were 19 or 20, my best friend Tony and I would go on what we called "mandates." That's were two guy friends go out together, doing things that you would normally do on a date. Except, we were single and sore at girls so it was just us hanging out with each other. It all started when Tony, a film student, asked me to go to some art house theater to watch Akira Kurosawa's Ran with him. Usually we would also go to some kind of fancy vegetarian restaurant that we had never been to as well. This was the kind of invitation that was open to the rest of our friends, but most of them being home bodies, decided not to go. After a few times of asking everyone, we gave up on them and it turned into a Tony-And-Spencer thing. Much of LA was discovered by these mandates that we went on. Another variation on the mandate is the masterdate; that's when you go to dinner and see a movie all by yourself. You should try it sometimes. Its practically the only way to insure that you don't miss the previews.

"You mean the semester started last week??"

I once showed up a week late for a semester at my local community college, a fact that was discovered only when I asked the teacher in front of the whole class about when were going to get the syllabus. And by "once" I mean yesterday.

With that out of the way, I now tag Jon Hex, Carla, Pachoob, Earth-2 Leigh, Brian Hughes, David Brothers, Chad, and Gorjus!

New Warriors # 1

2007-06-21T12:50:00.000-07:00

I finally got around to reading New Warriors # 1 which is a book that I did not want to miss. And why is that? Because I'm a huge fan of the original 25 issues of New Warriors. I became a fan in the 5th grade when a friend let me read his copy of issue # 1. This series was the first 4 color super hero team book I really sank my teeth into. Other books I was reading at the time were heavily tied to my love for 80's action movies and cartoons, such as Punisher and G.I. Joe, or featured a solo character such as Amazing Spider-man. The first team book I got into was Uncanny X-men (which I jumped on around issue # 270) however the tone of Uncanny X-men at the time was more serious and sometimes darker then the standard super hero fare. Magneto was issues away from killing Zaladane in the Savage Land; Wolverine, Jubilee & Psylocke had just fought off the Mandarin, mind control and a cadre of Hand ninjas in Madripoor; Dazzler was stalked by an obsessive fan; the mutant hating nation of Genosha had just kidnapped Xavier's students, which resulted in one of their deaths. This era of X-men stories were extremely well crafted, so much that they are partially responsible for the "sophisicated, written for the big screen" type comics that dominant the current comic book landscape, however they lacked the one thing that New Warriors excelled at and helped to turn me on to: good old fashion super hero fun.

Issue # 1 of this current New Warriors series by Kevin Grevioux and Paco Medina doesn't have that same sense of super heroics that Fabian Nicieza and Mark Bagley's original series did. Where the original New Warriors comics were at most times easy going and fun, this version of the New Warriors seems to forgo the light hearted nature of its predecessor and takes up a completely new agenda of its own which seems to only be saying "F You" to Tony Stark and the Registration. The only real light moment that comes up in this issue is the flirtation between Sofia and a young male customer who frequents the dinner she works at. Unfortunately, it suffers from the same poor dialogue that affects most teen characters in a medium that is mostly curated by middle aged men, a flaw that Nicieza himself, in my opinion, never really suffered from. Other than that, the rest of the book deals with the agenda at hand.

We start up with a glimpse of the New Warriors in action, chasing and catching a villian, only to leave him tied up with a message for both the super-villian community and the authorities in charge: Consider yourself warned. A sub plot is dangled in front of us, involving some NY police detectives that will be no doubt on the case of these New Warriors. We get a look inside the head of our lead character, Sofia, a former New Mutant by the name of Wind Dancer that lost her powers in the Decimation that came from House Of M. The recruitment process for Sofia starts off with a series of mysterious messages from an unknown party that ends with her being led into the Base Of Operations of the New Warriors. Night Thrasher, a former New Warriors, is re-introduced in a cliff hanger ending, leading us to question whether not he is somehow back from the explosion that killed him in Civil War # 1 or his suit is being worn by someone else. Its an interesting introduction to a new series, but its obviously far from over. We're still missing some members from the roster and its safe to say that we're 5 issues away from the obligatory "Woah, Buddy!" moment that solidifies every new super hero team's line up and mission purpose.

This isn't a comic book for new readers. Its a comic book for the fans of the New Warriors and Captain America's anti-Registration side, a demographic that is by its very nature is specific and narrow. Any complaints of the issue being "new reader unfriendly" really miss the point. This is for those Marvel fans that are intimately familiar with what has happened in the past two years of Marvel's publishing schedule, giving them a chance to see some kind of possible redemption for story lines that they are unhappy with. A mutant who was depowered due to Scarlet Witch's "No More Mutants" is given both the character, and all 5 of her fans, a second chance. The New Warriors are brought back to life, turning them from mere cannon fodder into the ones that are now manning the cannons. And they're pointing them directly at Stark Tower. The banner that was dropped by the anti-Registration's side at the end of Civil War is being picked right back up and turned into guerilla-styled tactics and subversive slogans painted on city walls to give voice to protest. The war is over but the revolution lives on...

Its not the worse book out there. It is nice to think of this being the book that echoes our own sentiments towards the outcome of Civil War. At some point, one of the lead characters will undoubtfully being wearing a 'Cap Was Right' t-shirt. Soon enough, we will see our New Warriors going toe to toe with Iron Man & Co. giving a select few of us that strange moment of escapist fantasy where our favorite D-Lister gets to smack Mr. Stark a good one for being such a prick. The only difference from New Warriors and the other comics that feature characters with dissenting voices against the Pro-Registration side such as Nova or the New Avengers is that the whole crux of this foray in escapism is very much dependent on the current state of things. What happens when that status quo changes? When the Post Civil War Marvel U. reverts back into the Plain Ol' Marvel U, a character like Nova can just fly back into space and pick up where the past decade of Marvel publishing has left off. And the New Avengers have Spider-man and Wolverine. What will be left for the New Warriors to do once there is no more Fascist Tony Stark to get them all riled up? Is there a Fugazi in the future for the Marvel U's Minor Threat?

Probably not. When this series gets cancelled, we'll be left with the same small group of dedicated New Warriors fans, ~~begging~~ blogging for a return to a time when Kickflip 5-0s to Haymakers ruled, Speedball was a fun, lovable loser, and Namorita was a shining example of a female super hero done right. Until then, we can be content with a group of nobodies telling Tony Stark to go $#&@ himself.

Some rants inspired by the Marvel Solicitations for September 2007

2007-06-19T16:37:00.000-07:00

Every now and then, about once a month, 12 times a year, all year long, Marvel likes to give us "fanboys" a sneak peek into what's coming out. The recent solicitations brought up something that I felt the need to kick around out in the open with the hope that I might understand this insular world that I have embraced to the inner core of my being.

One thing I don't get? Fans that get burned about the sudden stream of comic book appearances of a character due to that said character being featured up in a next big super hero blockbuster movie. The new crop of Silver Surfer related projects and appearances is what got me thinking in this direction. You dudes just get hella burnt, you do.

News of the black suit making its appearance in Spider-man 3 and everyone is all "sighs" and whines. Its funny because the people making these kind of remarks are mostly DC fans. As if the idea of Marvel trying to get some extra dollars by indirectly tieing in some of their comic books to their corresponding movies really turns your screw. However, when DC puts out a Silver Age collection of classic Brainac stories around the same time the latest Superman movie comes out in which Brainac is the feature villian, everyone is all "These stories are blowing mind! Yippie skippy!" Not trying to stir things up, its just an observation. Marvel fans get like that, too. Recently at New Joe Fridays, someone had to question Marvel's reasoning behind the Back In Black storyline. You almost feel like the Powers That Be have to apologize for the forthcoming movies editorializing the comics. Don't know about you, but it seems the way to run a business is to capitalize upon any kind of success and milk it for all its worth. When you're done with that, slap a variant cover on that summabitch!

Also, while we're vaguely on the subject of new solicitations....anyone notice a lack of the Black Panther title being solicited? Has it been canceled and I just missed it? If it was officially canceled, I imagine there would have been a nice little storm of thinly veiled racism and the subsequent commentary making its way across my screen. Until now, nothing yet.

Heroes Con & WW Philly: Wrap it up!

2007-06-18T10:44:00.000-07:00

Last post I was talking about doing a run down of this past weekend with all news from Heroes Con and WW Philly, separating most of the crap into their related editorial camps. One post, we talk about all things X. The next post, its WWH-related! Well, that was an idiotic idea because of the things they announced, I don't really give a damn about most of them, so....

I'll ramble while you read, alright? Okay.

Out of the Spider-man related announcements, the most interesting one is the cancellation of all the ancillary Spidey titles and making Amazing Spider-man a title that comes out three times a month. You sneaky bastards, Marvel Comics....making us fans buy Friendly Neighborhood and Sensational when we only want to read Amazing....just prey on our completist tendencies, why don'cha! Heaven forbid there should be a gap in my collection where Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa's not so great Spidey story takes place for the month! What are they going to do next?! Put Wolverine and Spider-man in every comic so that I have no choice put to buy them all!?!

That would be sheer fucking madness!

And can we stop talking about how a married Spider-man screws up the character? Go read Kraven's Last Hunt to get an idea of what a married Spider-man should be like. The idea that a bunch of 40+ year old men sitting around huge tables at creator summits and discussing ways to make Peter Parker single again in order to recapture that soap opera element that the book had when they were all kids is sad and depressing and will only lead to God awful stories that no one wants to read. Step away from the Retcon button and just deal with the fact that Spider-man has to swing to the super market every now and then to pick up some feminine products for MJ. Okay? Thank you.

Did you catch that part about how there's a Brian K. Vaughan and Eduardo Risso Wolverine Mini coming out? I would love to see an Eduardo Risso Wolverine. And Brian K. Vaughan just might give us back the Wolverine that we all deserve. Its only a mini, but damn, it'll probably all kinds of great.

Let's talk about Skrulls! Just read New Avengers # 31 and it wasn't all that bad. Bringing Jessica Jones and the baby into the mix like that seems pretty stupid, but its too soon to really say. At this panel, Bendis fields the usual stupid comics that a story like this will raise. Me, I just want a good story. Bendis is capable of those from time to time, so here's to hoping that this current path we're on does not give me ulcers.

The one announcement that Bendis did NOT make was the eradication of his catty ass thought balloons in Mighty Avengers. Hopefully by San Diego Comic-Con, we'll get that announcement along with a formal apology and coupons to redeem for re-lettered versions of those Mighty Avengers comics that don't have Ms. Marvel and Iron Man thinking like morons when they're not talking. They can either mail them to my house or send them in e-coupon form. I'm not picky.

Then there is the news of the X-Crossover, called The Messiah Complex. I imagine Magneto will be back yet again and everyone will be all "Dang!" to which Magneto replies "s'right!" and then fighting ensues alongside some parallels to how the X-men represent the struggles of the oppressed people in the real world. Why you gotta make me feel all bad for being a white privileged suburban male, huh X-men comics? Can't I just read about sexy mutants going all stabby and blasty and mental mind reading without having to feel like some jerk? Gosh!

Yeah, this will probably be another huge mess, but apparently that is what's for sale in today's world of mainstream super hero comics. Enjoy yourselves!

Heroes Con & WW Philly: Mondo Marvel & More

2007-06-15T16:05:00.000-07:00

The Summer Con season is in full swing, with both Heroes Con and Wizard World Philly going on this weekend at the same time. Since I am one of Marvel's six blogs, I have decided that its time to start acting like one by posting my idiotic commentary alongside the new announcements. To make things easy, I'll divide it up into different posts based upon editorial camps and what not, starting with basic Marvel stuff.

Are you ready for some hard hitting in your face bloggery?! If the answer is "No!", please click here. If the answer is "Hell yes, brother! Bring the pain!" then continue on....

All in all, things don't look so bad. And believe you me, there is no one more upset about that than myself. Why? Because I'm never really happy with comics unless they're pissing me off!

Captain America being written by the guy who created Rambo is only flawed by the fact that the comic itself doesn't actually STAR John Rambo, but we can just pretend that's whose under the mask, right?

Even though I only read the Nova mini and issue 1 of Annihilation, I am curious to see what the spin-offs will read like. That Star Lord cover is mega-spiffy in its Jin-Rohesque beauty.

And this I'm excited about. We get an Iron Fist annual which is proper because that title itself is the best super heroish book on the shelves. According to the cover which you can see to your right, it looks like its going to continue the grand tradition of being amazing.

I really like the cover for New Avengers # 34 because it hints at some crazy alternate universe story, which I always enjoy. Hell, as bad as House Of M was, I kind of dug it. The premise rocked despite all the glaring problems with the story.

We get a Penance mini-series which I'm sure we could all do without. Unless he's getting his balls back, I could care less for Penance. Nova I like. Don't worry, buddy. I'm going to pick up those two issues I missed when I make it the comic shop this weekend. Don't think I've forgotten about you. Is that Gamora holding his head? And is it okay if I'm slightly aroused by scantily clad space babes? Wait, no, that's not right. Its sexy zombie teenage girls that's got us frat boys all riled up. Thank you, Internet. Don't know what kind of sick fetish I would be chasing this week without you.

And then there's the new Marvel Comics Presents. You know that snazzy car that looks hella hot and drives gnarly fast that the protagonist drives in the 2nd The Fast & Furious movie? This is the comic book version of it. Its a mother fraggin' sports car of a comic book that's gonna race off of the racks, right at your ass, so you best get out of the way or else you gonna get run over! And quite frankly, I don't think that some of you could handle that.

Yeah, I'm not too sure what that's supposed to mean other than this comic looks HOT!

But dayuuuuuuuuuuuum....that Hellcat looks absolutely splendid. I can't think of anyone else that could do a better job with the character. Writing a comic book with your significant other sounds like it could be dangerous. Does Mrs. Immonen get all "we gonna have the big finish gone down like this or else you'll drawing your little boy comics in the dog house, Mister!"...? Because she totally could. Us men are like silly putty in your hands, women. That's why we oppress you with our comics so much.

I like Khoi Pham's depiction of the Captain America-copied kick that Taskmaster is delivering to that S.H.I.E.L.D. flunky. It kind of makes me wish that I was at home alone on a lazy saturday afternoon, air-fighting imaginary ninja foes.

Seeing names like Josh Fialkov, Barry Kitson, B. Clay Moore and Lee Weeks attached to this makes me happy. And Christos Gage, too. He's growing on me, that one.

Even the Weird multi-verse Spidey doesn't seem like such a bad idea. Especially since it'll probably only be 5 to 10 pages at time for an issue or three. I'm on board. If I ever get a pull started, this book is definitely going to be on it.

If they could Sam Kieth and Rob Liefeld drawing dudes like Longshot and Deathlok, it would buy 5 copies, but I get them CGC graded and shot up into space to insure nothing would ever happen to them that would cause them to lose value! Ok, that wasn't right. Sam Kieth is actually awesome even if he draw some funky Wolverine action back in the old MCP.

Even though this is more X-men related, they talked about it today so I'll just lump it in. The Angel: Revelations mini-series.

Er, uh....what? I, um.....I'm not going to read this when it comes out therefore this will probably be the first and last time I ever blog about an Angel mini-series at all. As a matter of fact, I could quite possibly be commenting on YOUR blog about how unsmart you are for wasting everyone else's time with your review of issue # 3 when it comes out. While we're on the subject of useless mini-series, let's pitch some that could be of equal importance and probably not worthy of anyone's reading time:

Paste Pot Pete: Unglued!
Captain Ultra Happy Fun Time Romancing Love
Erik & Charles: The College Years
What about Frogman?
Rom The Spaceknight: You got your wish. Can you stop bugging us now?

And that's all we have to say about Angel: Revelations and all of the other exciting announcements and preview art we've seen so far. Next, we'll talk about Spider-man. By next I mean probably on Monday or Tuesday!

LOLJoes

2007-06-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

LolBots!!!

I got nothing

2007-06-11T14:39:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry. I have neglected my blobligations. I'm like that friend that you really want to hang out with that never returns your calls. Its not because I stopped liking you, it just that I've been BUSY.

Honestly.

I blame it all on the band. In case you did not know, I'm in band called Secret Wars. Its loud, obnoxious crap that most of you probably out grew sometime in the early 90's. And yes, its called Secret Wars. It was either that or Robocop A Feel, which we declined to use due to copyright reasons. We've had 4 shows in the past week with 3 more to go between now and next monday. Playing this many shows this close together is a new thing for us so its kind of taking its toll on me. Add in the extra 2 or 3 hours that band members spend after the show picking up on not so good looking chicks(except Sparky! Dude finally came up!) and there have been quite a few late week nights that I could do without.

Other than that, not much comic book reading. I picked up the Other Side which just read like an algamation of every good Vietnam movie thrown into one. Despite that complaint, the last few pages redeemed the whole thing for me. In non-comic book reading news, I'm making my way through Joseph Heller's Good As Gold. Its an interesting book takes Catch 22 and throws it into the realm of Politicians and Family. Its good, but not AMAZING. After I get through this, I think I am either going to pick up some more Chabon or Lethem. Sure, its hipster reading, but its so damn good.

Well, that's all I got. Just wanted to say hey. What's new with all of yous?

Blogger Hits 200th Post!

2007-06-11T14:37:00.000-07:00

Still upset about crappy comics.

Live Antholobloggin!

2007-06-04T12:59:00.001-07:00

Today, for the first time....EV-ER! I, Spencer D. Carnage will be bringing YOU, the fearless reader(s), Live Antholoblogging. For those that are curious as to what exactly Live Antholoblogging is, please consort with the Live Antholoblogging FAQ:

Q: What is Live Antholoblogging?
A: Live Antholoblogging is where I read a comic book anthology and blog to you, LIVE, about the whole thing. Its kind of like blogging the Oscars but not as boring or "Been there, done that, yawn"-ish. In other words, its groundbreakingly awesome.

Work's slow so I thought I'd treat you guy(s). Today we are going to Live Antholoblog New Reliable Press's you ain't no dancer vol. 2 which was released towards the end of the last year that I picked up two months ago at APE. Let's dive in, shall we?

11:10 AM 6/4/2007
Let's take a look at the cover. That's Jeffrey Brown throwing down a picture of a kid getting pinned to ground. Oh nos!, that beetle's gonna get yo 'shit! Eh, I'm not a big fan of Mr. Brown's work, but I like the concept that he's got going on here.

11:11 AM 6/4/2007
"A Recipe For Youth" by Hope Larson. 2 pages of nice things that you should touch in order to stay young. It starts out with a purring cat which is thumbs up in my book! I could make some joke about how a woman's hoo hoo is not on the list, but I won't.

11:13 AM 6/4/2007
"Puzzles" by Meg Hunt. Another little story about the nostalgia of our youth as incited by doing puzzles when you are older. See? Even indie artists nerds are all about nostalgic. I bet you Meg's all "The crosswords in Garfield's Crossword Extraganza from 1985 were so much better than the ones they got in those wack ass Spongebob puzzle books..." Right?

11:15 AM 6/4/2007
"Enormous" by Patrick Murphy. Okay. Some big ass ol monster comes up to a some kid's house, which prompts this small child to climb up the monster's back and fall asleep. While sleeping, guess what the monster does? EATS HIS HOUSE. Got a nice chuckle out of me, so it's all good in the hood, G. Yeah.

11:17 AM 6/4/2007
"Weatherlad" by Weatherwise. Finally! Some of those stupid super heroes that I hate/love/hate so much! Wait a second...this isn't a super hero story. Its about a nerd that likes super heroes being forced to ask girl out! Now that's Science Fiction if I ever saw it. Nicely done, Mr. Weatherwise, even if there's no one getting punched out or being forced to Register or else!....

11:20 AM 6/4/2007
"Those Were The Days" Mitch Clem is funny. One page, six panels, all about the agony of being a teenager. I think Mitch has voyeuristic access to my youth as an awkward hessian turned punk rock adolescent, sans the hilarious alcoholic father.

11:22 AM 6/4/2007
Ugh... duty calls! BRB!

11:24 AM 6/4/2007
Ok, I'm back. Where was I? Oh yeah, Mitch Clem. Good stuff! Next!

11:24 AM 6/4/2007
"Chimney Preference" by Jeffrey Brown. Umm. I don't really like Jeffrey Brown. Everything I've read is just super whiny emo crappity crap comics. He can't really draw and his life does not seem interesting enough for me to want to read about it. That what he does, auto-bio comics right? Yeah, not fan. This two pager just recounts some childhood thing he did, which is miles better than the young adult to adult things he does, but so what? First crappy strip of the book. Let's hope that's all we gotta deal with.

11:27 AM 6/4/2007
"Michael Redhead" by Jordyn Bochon. Let me tell you something. I am a redhead. More of a reddish-brown head, but still pretty much a red head. As a red head I have a confession to make: I don't really like other redheads. It like showing up at prom and someone else is wearing the exact same dress. Now there are exceptions, but for the most part, if you got red hair, I don't want anything to do with you. In this strip, we briefly analyze the down-trodden childhood life of Michael Redhead and then state that we don't know what happened to him after some presumed escape from our lives in highschool. Who cares? He's a stupid ass ginger that's probably trading tricks for rocks. Good riddance to bad rubbish! The art in this one is really good though. Thank god it was in black & white. Don't wanna flare up like a bull looking at Michael Redhead's flame orange hair. God!

11:31 AM 6/4/2007
"Indian Princess" by Colleen MacIssac. One page strip about two friends that want to dress up as indian princesses. Of course, the honky girl shows up as a native american. (The other girl was actually Indian.) Stupid white people! They're # 2 on the list of people I hate, right below mother fuggin' redheads!

11:33 AM 6/4/2007
More work stuff. Hold up.

11:36 AM 6/4/2007
Alright. Next we have "When I grew up" by Liz Prince. This falls in line with that same Jeffrey Brown rant, artistically speaking. The punch line isn't as bad, but I'm not running out to buy any of her work anytime soon.

11:37 AM 6/4/2007
"Overcompensating Babies: 1988-Lunch Special" by Jeffrey Rowland. Its a bunch of white kids running around, talking ebonics and going on about lunches and Yo! Mtv Raps. The improper use of Street Knowledge can be a bit cliche, but it works here. So far the longest story at 7 pages.

11:40 AM 6/4/2007
"Of Course, Of Course, Of Course" by K Thor. Jensen. Oh, see that's what I like. Some indie artist talking about how when he or she was a kid, that they hoped they would get super powers and now they tell us in their artsy fartsy way how they went about doing it. Haven't read any of K. Thor Jensen's work, but now I'm inclined to do so. Funny stuff he's got going on in here.

11:43 AM 6/4/2007
"The Eve of" by Blaise Laramee. An interesting little look into the world of teenagers after high school going back and doing the stuff they used to do IN highschool. You see the overall theme this anthology's got going on? Its drawn well and doesn't upset me like redheads or Jeffrey Brown so I give it 2 thumbs up. At the end, there's a fade out right after the two girlfriends approach each other, with words "Oh, Yvonne." captioning the fade to black. This take place in a cemetary. Am I an a-hole for assuming this was their first lesbian kiss with each other? Or is Blaise Laramee an a-hole for not showing us the goods? Please don't skimp on the girl-on-girl make out sessions next time, thank-YOU!

11:47 AM 6/4/2007
"Litter" by Grant Reynods. Woah. Show us some cute puppies being taken care by they momma only to show the owner do away with the whole pack. Its beautifully illustrated but harsh. Why you gotta make me all sad?

11:48 AM 6/4/2007
"The Third Cat" by Lilli Carre. Ok, a cat comic. Not so sad anymore. Hold up. Did that guy just break that cat's back just because Mr. Whiskers got a little scratch friendly? Indie comics just want to bum you out and make you feel as miserable as the people doing so. Thanks alot, you underpaid miserable cartoonist!

11:50 AM 6/4/2007
"With Pig Eyes" by Jason Turner. Jason Turner did my Lockjaw & Lockheed sketch, so he's cool even if the story is a little bongo. We get to take yet another trip into someone's past, except this guy seems crazy and wears a pig's head on his head. I like his brush work even if its a little rough.

11:52 AM 6/4/2007
"Sharp Young Minds" by Phil McAndrew. Another fine little 4 page strip. Its got charm and wit, and was drawn like hell. Reminds me a little bit of the art from Where The Wild Things Are. I like it.

11:54 AM 6/4/2007
"Gunplay" by Jeff Bent. An imaginary tale of kids playing "war" that's pretty funny. Playing "war" as a kid was the best. Except for when Kevin played. Kevin was the neighborhood nerd that was always getting whooped by whatever powers and/or weapons I devised for myself that day. Right as you were about to lay the smack down, he'd cross his arms across his chest and yell "teleport!" all whinyish. That used to PISS us off. Or he would always come up behind you and "paralyze" you with his "paralyzing touch." Paralyze? Teleport? Please! You wanna play war, you gotta play WAR! There's no teleporting or paralyzing in Energized Bo Staff to Energized Bo Staff combat! Did I tell you that Kevin was also from Missouri that wore Coke bottle glasses? Yeah, he was pretty lame.

11:57 AM 6/4/2007
"Fanboy Meets The Wooly Bear" by Dalton Webb. Fangboy vs. Wooly Bear over the last fig. Fangboy wins. And that's about all I can say for this one. Next!

11:58 AM 6/4/2007
"Sled" by Jon Sukarangsan. Kids go sledding and run into the Goddess of Fate who inquires into the death defying nature of children. Its fairy tale-ish. And stuff. Drawn very well, too.

12:00 PM 6/4/2007
"Books Before Bed" by Graham Kahler. Another pleasant little romp into the fantasy land of children. I think.....? Decent, but whatever.

12:04 PM 6/4/2007
"A Fifth Hole Adventure" by Fred Grisolm and Jamie DeeGaleey. This one's good. Two guys get attached to each other by two umbilical cords which eventually shatters all of reality. A nice little commentary on gay marriage in showing how stupid people are when they talk as of allowing gay marriage to take place will ruin life as we know it. Why you gotta be all oppressive and shit, dang ol' homophobic straight people?

12:07 PM 6/4/2007
"Untitled" by Dalton Sharp. Another good little strip. Just a bunch of panoramic glimpses into the various different generations of young adults, starting in the 40s that ends with a post-apocalyptic future. Sometimes I wish that society would just get over itself and just destroy itself. Then I could outfit my Civic with steel plates and gun turrets and call it the UnCivic. Don't be trying to steal gas from me unless you want a crossbow to the skull!

12:12 PM 6/4/2007
"Up Til Now" by Neil Babra. And we finish off with a wordless montage of life, love, and heartbreak. Neil Barba sure can draw. It gets a little weird and metaphysical half way through, but then again, what is love without a little bit of metaphysical squid tentacles coming at you to illustrate your broken heart? Its stupid, that's what it is.

And that's it. Our first foray into Live Anthoblogging! I feel kind of exhausted and tired after all that. Maybe this wasn't the best anthology to try this little experiment out with because of the shortness of all the stories. Then again, most anthologies are like that. Short and sometimes sweet.

Damn. How the hell could a person do this for the god awful Oscars or American Idol is beyond me.

Spoil Sport

2007-05-31T10:54:00.000-07:00

THE FLASH: THE FASTEST MAN ALIVE #14
Written by Marc Guggenheim
Art by Tony S. Daniel & Art Thibert
Cover by Joshua Middleton

DC Comics announces the second month of a special FLASH promotion as the Fastest Man Alive’s world changes forever! Retailers: please check your the Previews order form for a special incentive designed to help you meet the demand for this story. Fans: remind your retailer early and often to order you a copy!
On sale July 18 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

If you only buy one comic book this week...

2007-05-30T10:11:00.000-07:00

Make sure its called Shaolin Cowboy # 7. It rarely makes any sense, comes out every 3 to 4 months and is completely hilarious. If you buy 7 comics this week, get Shaolin Cowboy issues 1 through 6 as well. Once you meet that quota, you can buy all the Countdowns and Hulk Super Fight comics you want.

The Spirit and Criminal

2007-05-30T08:14:00.000-07:00

Ok. So I have been enjoying Mr. Cooke's newest iteration of The Spirit up until the last few issues. Let's talk about this, shall we?

First three issues? Great, great stuff. Last three issues, not so much. # 4 wasn't all that horrible, but 5 & 6? Pure crap. Blue? Spirit Beans? After reading both issues last night, I was curious exactly how much of those stories were reworked versions of Eisner's source material. This early in the game, I am quite sure that they are just that. Are the originals that bad as well?

And Mr. Cooke's art doesn't have the same Pop! for me that it did in New Frontier. Maybe when he is walking the super hero beat, the work shines. Cooke's semi-urban gritty pulp noir stuff doesn't seem to sit too well in my aesthetic nether-regions. Same can be said for his work on Batman Ego. Cooke can still draw himself some pretty girls, though. However, 6 issues in and I am dropping it. To see such a decline in quality does amuse me at all.

I also got a chance to read Brubaker and Phillip's Coward trade for their Criminal Series. I bought the first issue then decided on waiting for the trade. Its good, but its not amazing. Thinking back to their Sleeper work, it took a couple rereads for me to really enjoy it. Criminal works well, but I feel like maybe my standards were set a little high. Then again, this is the first arc which are notorious for lagging a bit. Reviews of issue 6 have been good and I figure now is a good time to give the single issues another shot and see how it goes from there, because, well......its god damn Bru and Phillips!

Shhhhh....

2007-05-29T08:27:00.000-07:00

Remember when that Painted Doll person spoiled Civil War a few weeks before the first issue hit? Happened at Progressive Ruin a year ago with nary a mention only to rear its ugly head 8 months later and eventually made its way to Lying In The Gutters? That might have been me. And I might have a decent spoiler in the next few days for all you Silver Age DC fans out there.

Maybe.

A few tidbits and what not...

2007-05-29T07:48:00.000-07:00

I bought me some comics last sunday and read most of them. And most of those, I actually enjoyed. Even New Avengers # 30. However, there are a few panels where Spider-man starts talking about how the New Avengers formed weeks ago with the prison break out. The problem is that I'm almost certain that there has been previous mentions in terms of time elapsing, specifically with the House Of M debacle, that are greater than just a few weeks. Now I feel strangely compelled to go back and read some of those back issues just so I could say "See!!! You got it wrong, Bendissssssss!!! Ha!!!!!!!" because, as a fan, its my god given right.

Right?

It is the nitpickiness like that, that makes me somewhat ashamed for the role that I sometimes play in comic book culture. Quite frankly, when I see myself getting all fanboyish, it scares the living hell out of me. At least it has lately. That's why Civil War did such a number on me and my comic book reading habits. I got way too invested and found my passion for super hero comics turn into Newsaramian levels of stupidity when it was all a huge let down. The fact that my mind is hard-wired to digest and store continuity into the archives of my comic book knowledge is somewhat gnarly. Any hiccups in continuity that don't jive cause frustration. Why is that? I can be forgiving, sure. Most of the time I am. Given the time and effort, I could come up with a series of cliff notes that explain every last little screw up in the way that the writers should have done themselves. It would come with little word balloons that you could paste into your comic that when reread would elicit responses such as "well, that explains that whole New Avengers Collective/HoM fall out arc...." I have the power and technology to make it happen. If only there was the passion. There is the passion, but it freaks me out because the last thing a dashing, young bachelor like myself really needs to be thinking about at a bar on a friday night is the lastest issue of X-men when really, I should be trying to sleep with loose, easy women. But damn it, there must be some way to reconcile Wolverine's behaviour in Uncanny X-men with that of his appearance in Astonishing.....right?!?!

Another drink, please? Thank you.

And was I the only one that was a little upset that Ronin didn't talk off his mask and bro down with Falcon at the Secret Wake in Captain America # 26?

Falcon! Bro! S'up! 'Member how I died?! Crazy, huh? Yeah, I came back somehow and totally banged the broad that killed me in the first place! Bet you Quicksilver is going to be MAD when he finds that out. Oh, the new costume? Yeah, I don't know. I've been getting high alot. Tends to happen when you die and come back from the dead. Whatevs.

But they don't let me write these comics so whatever. Just sit in the corner and stare at your boy while wearing your trannie ninja costume, Clint! See if I care!

Dude! I got linked by the Beat again! And for what? For calling this whole Tentacle Marvel business months before it happened. When I really put my mind to the world of comics, I can bring some next level shiznit. Go scour my archives if you want to see what the future of comic bookery is going to be like! Forecast: fully awesome and hella sexy. Just like me!

Apparently there is this movie that spawned all this stuff that just went through some 30 some odd year anniversary.......? Look. After much debate amongest the friends and I, I have decided that the original Star Wars trilogy? Not the best trilogy out there. To set the record straight:

Number one with a bullet. Its all Han and no Luke. And real Nazis. Not the fake Imperial Stormtrooper kind of Nazis, but real ones. With accents. And plans for world domination using buried treasure. And why does Indy fight these nazis? Because things like the Ark belong in a museum. That's why.

Marty McFly will ALWAYS be cooler than Luke Skywalker. And even though he doesn't have the swagger of Han Solo, the dude can still rock. Whether he's blowing up 10 foot high amp heads, hover boarding around in the future or moon walking in the wild, wild west, Marty McFly totally rules. In case you're wondering, Time Traveling Deloreans will always beat out the ship that made the Kessel Run in 4.5 parsecs. Sorry, but that's how it is.

Which brings us to third place....

Star Wars. That's where you belong in the Holy Trinity of Top 3 Trilogies. Loved all three of the Star Wars movies as a kid. Even more so then Indiana Jones and Back To The Future. But as I go back and rewatch them, Star Wars sinks to the bottom. Maybe its because of the subsequent mountains of crap that came after, I don't know. All I DO know is that they don't hold a candle to my boys Indy and McFly.

Nah'mean?

Whatever you do, just don't say that C-word...

2007-05-23T11:29:00.000-07:00

I took one the commenters advice(I think it was Googum) and bought myself a book by Haruki Murakami. Kafka On The Shore, to be exact. Thank you, Googum. Its an interesting piece of fiction that slowly crawls into a supernatural world of talking cats, ghosts, and god knows what else will come of it. It starts off small and mundane and builds from there. Half way through it and already I am a proper fan of Murakami's work. If you get the chance, pick it up. Next I read Paul Auster's Brooklyn Follies. That should be interesting. I read David Mazzuchelli and Paul Karasik's graphic novel adaptation of Auster's City Of Glass which was mind blowingly fantastic. If you have not read the graphic novel of City Of Glass, punch yourself in the private parts already! Its got the dude who drew Batman Year One!

Books: They have absolutely nothing to do with the Post Civil War Marvel U!

To continue my jaunt into the non-comic book reading world, I wanted to turn to you, the readers. My memorial weekend of nude sun bathing and Coors Lite drinking in Laughlin, NV fell apart on me. Instead, I will kicking around the homestead, nude sun bathing and drinking Coors Lite HERE. I am thinking about taking in a movie. Something independent preferably. Any recommendations? Its been awhile since I've taken in a good indie film in the theatre and I thought this weekend would be a good time as any. So start throwing some titles at me because I am completely clueless as to what's out there right now.

And, uh....that's all I got. See ya!

Bor-ring!

2007-05-15T09:43:00.000-07:00

Not much in the way of comics going on around here. Unless you count that Buddy Does Jersey collection I've been plowing through one #2 at a time. That, and Fortress Of Solitude. I loved it. Now I'm on to Love Is A Mixtape by Rob Sheffield which I'm feeling just might be a little too Old Alternative Dudeness for me. We'll see.

But yeah. No comics. God, it feels kind of good. I know, this is probably the 6th time I have made a post like this this year, but what I can say?

Suck it, comics!

Take your crappy culture of nitpickiness, nostalgia and idiotic gender fighting and gets a stepping already! I don't really care about Countdown. I don't care about World War Hulk. I don't care about Ultimates # 13 finally coming out. I don't care which sex superhero comics were made for. I don't care if Spider-man punching Doc Ock subconsciously oppresses your vagina. I don't care if Commander Steel makes you feel disgusted or slightly aroused. I don't care about some crazy back issue from the 70's and how it'll totally blow my mind. I really don't. Its all hogwash and horseshit to me right now. No offense to those who DO care. Keep on keeping on. As it currently stands, I have 100s trades that are taking up way too much space in my room that really just need to go. The level of my obsession needs to be scaled back significantly and I'm starting with the Black Widow and Avengers Kree-Skrull War trades first!

I'm off to work on a speech about Network Neutrality. If comics start causing drama again, please keep from posting it anywhere where I can see it. Thanks!

Feliz Cumpleanos, vatos!

2007-05-07T09:42:00.000-07:00

It's my birthday!

Or it was. On friday. May The Fourth be with you, brother! Guess what I did for my birthday?

A.) Got wicked drunk at some uber-swank bar and vomited on some hipster chick I was trying to mack on

B.) Got wicked drunk and went to a strip club where I feel in love with a girl named "Cocoa" that wouldn't give me the time of the day unless I had money

C.) Got wicked drunk at Fridays and punched out some douchebag for trying to harsh my mellow with his ugly face on my birthday

D.) Got wicked drunk in Vegas and had to be dragged out of a casino for aggressively proposing to some cocktail waitress in tights

If you guessed ANY of the above, you are wrong! The real answer is:

E.) Stayed wicked sober in Utah, hanging out with the Mormon family for my sister's graduation

Believe-THAT! Me, Spencer Carnage, the mess of blogger that I am, rocking the spot in Mormon country, straight edge styley! And not the cool, windmill kicking, XXX inked kind of straight edge styley! But the boring ass, sit around and watch some TV, read and check email kind of straight edge styley! Jealous? Thought so!

Yes, my sister graduated with a Masters in Mental Health Counseling so my father, step-mother and I made the 13 hour trip up on thursday so we could be there for the occassion. Since most of my family is religious, with my sister herself a recovering alcoholic, there was nary a drop of booze to be had. The fact that my birthday falls a day before Cinco De Mayo only compounded my own alcoholic problems. The problem being....there was no alcohol! Stopping in Vegas on the way back sunday for a buffet lunch definitely did not help. It was almost as if Joseph Smith himself was mocking him.

The weekend, despite the boredom, was nice. I played Uno like a motherfucker. My sister's cat and dog both love me. My bratty 11 year old neice has a bruise on her arm for being such a bratty 11 year old neice. The family and I got to discuss the going ons in our lives, using the art of cinema as common ground. I read Stephen King's Dark Tower: The Gunslinger and half of Jonathan Lethem's Fortress Of Solitude. I went to a pretty decent music store and picked me up some Feist, Explosions In The Sky, and Tv On The Radio. I even got my dad to rock out to TV On The Radio's Wolf Like Me on the way back. I actually found myself liking this one country song about jumping on the grenade so your friend can get himself some. I visited what was is apparently the biggest hunting store in America so I could purchase a proper jacket for the cold ass weather. I feel in love with lots of hot Mormon girls. I even saw Spider-man 3 and laughed at Jazz Dancing Emo Spidey.

Sober the whole time.

It should be a crime, I say. You know what's a crime in Utah? Holding two drinks in your hand at the same time. Found that one out a few years ago when I lasted visited. Its illegal to double fist in Utah. And they don't have bars, they have clubs where you pay for a nightly membership which includes the first two drinks with the price. And they still smoke in clubs out there! What is up with your wack laws, Utah?! Have you anything to say for yourself??!

The State of Utah pleads the Fifth on that one.

You wanna see what my friends got for me before I left? Check it out:

That's from New Warriors # 2! The one where they take on Midnight's Fire and the villiany of A.I.M. weaponry. Wanna to read more about it? Do it! I was thoroughly stoked when Tony and Ryan presented this to me. They are what you call, Homies For Life. Much better than what you guys and girl got me! And don't even give me that "we didn't know it was your birthday" crap. You should have just known! What other things about me does your ignorance reign supreme? WHAT COLOR ARE MY EYES!?

You all should be ashamed of yourselves on this glorious, Utah-free morning...

Ghost Ride The Cap!!

2007-05-02T11:02:00.000-07:00

He fought for our
freedom in World War 2...

As the leader of the Earth's Mightiest Heroes, he has saved our world and many others countless times...

He stood against the Super Hero Registration Act to protect the freedom of our beloved Heroes...

Turning himself in at the end of the Civil War, Captain America was maliciously shot and killed on National Television while awaiting trial...

Longing for a second
chance at life.....

Steve Rogers made a
deal with the Devil...

Just so he could come back
and kick some un-patriotic Ass!

GHOST RIDE THE WHIP!!!

Blame Pachoob and Jason. They started it.

Fallen Short

2007-04-30T15:23:00.000-07:00

Don't know if you guys heard, but Captain America died. Oops! I forgot my spoiler tags, didn't I! Yeah, well, he's dead, bro. Sorry. And now we get see how the Marvel U. grieves. As of this date we are currently going through the first 2 stages of some snoody professor something or other's 5 Stages Of Grief.

Stage 1, homey! Denial!

That's where Wolverine comes in and gets all "nuh uh, bitches!" and starts his poking around. That's right, Wolvie! Ain't nobody should believe that Cap's dead unless you, Canadian Mutie Ultimate Killing Cigar Smoking Machine, confirms. Before he does, he tries to get Cap's old shower-grab-ass buddy, Bucky, in on it. Bucky's all vague and stupid, so Wolvie ditches his lame-o ass and gets DD on the case. After some sneaking around and what not, sho' nuff, it turns that Captain America is really dead. And that's Denial for you. Next time I'm in the midst of Grief Attack, I will turn to my good friend, Wolverine, for some proper guidance on how to deal with Denial. It ain't just a river in Egypt!

Next, we have Stage 2!

The main boss at the end of this level is Anger, with Whiny Spider-man and Pissy Pants Namor as the mini-bosses. Pass this level and you get to upgrade to BARGAINING with Captain America....? Wait a second. With Captain America? Isn't he dead? Now, here is where I would talk about what happens in Fallen Soldier: Avengers, but its really just a bunch of heroes getting all mad and upset and whiny, which just plays out as bad as it sounds. What I want to know is what happens in Fallen Soldier: Bargaining if Captain America is dead?

Does that mean we get to see Steve Rogers in hell(cuz you know that's where he belongs!) bargaining with Mephisto for his soul? Let's hope so. If we're lucky, we'll get ourselves a Ghost Riding Captain America. Wouldn't that be effin' suh-WEET?! Hells to yeah, my friends. Someone get Brevoort and Quesada to green light my Ghost Riding Captain America proposal ASAP! I'm talking flaming Shields and a penance stare that chills you to the bone 'cuz you're being un-patriotic! I can say with the upmost honesty that Flaming Skull Captain America who rides across the U S of A on a motorcycle with fire for wheels with a flag flying from the back of it is probably the most American Thing you would ever see.

If you just teared up while reading that last sentence, pat yourself on the back for being a proud citizen of the greatest nation on Earth. You're one of the good ones, my friend.

The end of your rope is a noose

2007-04-26T16:57:00.000-07:00

I have not purchased a real SUPERHERO comic in weeks. It shows, as you can see. The frequency of blogging around here drops significantly when I'm not pissed at Marvel Comics. And its not like they are doing something right over there, I just ain't buying it. You know what, son? It feels goooooooooooooood.

But if I refrain from trash talking the latest issue of X-men, how am I going to update this blog on the daily, weekly or monthly basis? I can't! That's like trying to make Gambit cool! Not in MY house! Without Marvel Comics to hate on, there is nothing worth blogging about! Its true! I am almost at the point of pulling every crappy Post-Civil War comic just so I will have some fodder for this unwieldly blog of mine.

I could always just do Get Your World War Hulk On. If there ever was a reason to buy Marvel Comics right now, doing a remixed version of someone else's webcomic could be just that reason. Is that what blogging has come to for me? Buying crappy comics just so I have something entertaining for all 5 of you to read?

Quick! Somebody convince me otherwise before I start thinking of ways to come up with gladiator sex jokes involving Hulk and the Brood!

Serious Literature

2007-04-26T12:56:00.000-07:00

From Michael Kupperman's Tales Designed To Thrizzle # 1

SF: APE Sketches

2007-04-24T14:16:00.000-07:00

Lockheed & Lockjaw Team-Up by Jason Turner:

Lockjaw by Anders Nilson:

Pretty birdy by Anders Nilson:

I didn't get that many sketches. I did not even think about sketches until I saw "Will Sketch Anything for $1" sign at Jason Turner's table. Then I saw Anders Nilson and asked him to hook me up with another Lockheed & Lockjaw Team-Up. After he did Lockjaw, he decided he had had enough and did that nice little bird. Its fun getting independent comic artists to draw semi-obscure characters from the Big Two. The look of confusion that crosses their face when you say "Lockjaw from the Inhumans" that slowly melts away into understanding after you explain that Lockjaw is that teleporting dog with the fork on his head is worth it alone. Plus, you get a kick ass sketch out of it. Admit it, Anders. You would totally work on some Spider-man if given the chance!

SF: Comics, Booze and a bearded guy named Sparky

2007-04-24T09:16:00.001-07:00

A friend and I drove up to San Francisco last weekend so we could attend the Alternative Press Expo. How was it? It was great.

We drove up from Los Angeles friday night only to arrive at Pachoob's house at the wee hours of the night. Upon our arrival, we started drinking and watching Delta Force II. While my friend Sparky started to mess around with a Wii so he could check his myspace, Pachoob and I discussed our mutual disdain towards Warren Ellis's more recent, non-Authority/Planetary/Transmetropolitan work. After some more Wii action, we all passed out, with Sparky having the last word in regards to Pachoob drunk, annoying female roommate. Sparky is only in SF for the girls and Angela didn't make the cut.

Saturday morning comes and Pachoob's friends started to make their way over. Sparky cracks open the first beer at 11:30 AM much to the surprise of everyone. "I'm on the Vay Kay, dudes!" After a little bit of lollygagging, we make our way to the convention. As we enter, we discover a bar to our right. Sparky and a few others quickly make their way over. A half-hour later, I myself am walking around the floor with some Whiskey & Coke, apologizing to all the booths for not having any cash on me to buy their stuff. After some effort, I manage to get directions to an ATM and make a withdrawal.

The Alternative Press Expo is my first comic convention. Thank God. If half the things they say about San Diego and the WizardWorld are true, I think I may stick with the indie crowd. No bad BO, no idiot fanboys, lots of cute girls, and a bar. Everyone I talked to was really friendly. I could have easily spent a whole paycheck on comics if I wanted to. Its hard to approach a booth and not find something you like. I got my hands on a number of mini-comics this way. I met Nate Powell, whose work I have read in the Meathaus 8: Headgames anthology. Anders Nilsen did a couple sketches for me(which I will post later.) I also got a really cool sketch from Jason Turner as well. I did miss Bryan Lee O'Malley and Kevin Huizenga unfortunately. I saw Art Spiegelman talk for a bit. Ran into a kid I know from LA. Sparky had a nice Stranger Than Fiction moment when some cute girl came up to him and told him that he looked just like a character from her comic brought to life. It was a great time. I wish I would have taken more pictures, but I simply forget in the face of so many great comic books. Everyone that came with us to the show walked away with something they liked. Even the non-comic book reading fans such as Sparky enjoyed it.

After the show, we ate and rested. Watching Charm School we found ourselves enamored with the ramblings of Buckwild, occasionally invoking her sage-like wisdom several times through out the day. Night time came and we headed to the bars. We did shots of fernet and danced to 80's music. Sparky, being the Dodger fan that he is, accosted the Giants fans in our group. At some point we made our way home and passed out. We had ourselves some brunch the next day, said our goodbyes to our gracious hosts, and headed back down to LA with a hang over.

I had an awesome time. Pachoob and all his friends were really cool and I look forward to hanging out with them again soon. Sparky himself was as entertaining as ever, whether it was on the dance floor trying to get with chicks or on the car ride home, divulging all sorts of stories about his idiot self. I ran into some old friends that I have not seen in a while. To top it all off, I have a crap load of new comics that I will be making my way through for the next couple of weeks. If you ever get the chance to go to APE, do so. Its a great show with lots of great comics and good people. You can even stay with Pachoob! That dude's got himself a Wii!

SF: The Return

2007-04-23T10:04:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader(s),

I made it back from San Francisco in one piece. APE was awesome and Pachoob & Co. are hella bitchin' folks to hang with. I am currently in recovery mode right now. Hang tight and I should have a full report in the next day or two. Take care and talk to you soon.

Sincerely,

Spencer D. Carnage

Happy Earth Day!

2007-04-20T08:06:00.000-07:00

In celebration of this fine Earth that we live on, I bring you this:

The Flash getting beat up by hippies.

Random stuff

2007-04-19T11:18:00.000-07:00

I finally finished Kavalier & Clay. What a great book. It took forever and a day because of these dang funny books I be wrasslin' with. If you haven't read it, DO SO NOW.

I also recently read Ander Nilson's Don't Go Where I can't Follow and The End. As the years pass by in this life of mine, I come ever closer to the realization that I am a colossal wuss. At one point, I was reading The End and I choked back a sob. At work. Powerful, intense, and raw. And different. These ain't no super hero books.

Going through some stuff last night, I came across a letter that I had written in the 9th grade ('94) which was to be opened at the end of 12th grade. ('97.) My goals included owning every Image Comic and owning a bass. Needless to say, I do not own every Image Comic. I do own and play a guitar though which in the context of the first goal, is like owning every Image, Ultraverse AND Valiant Comic combined. Take that, failed guitarists!

Also, I came up with a pretty decent pitch for a Cloak & Dagger mini-series. I know, its weird that I would even type that sentence, but it hit me on the 170 freeway awhile back. Like my friend Tony says, it could use a little more high concept to it, but when you have "super heroes gain powers from using drugs", I can't imagine you going more high concept than that. Do I really need to invoke the power of communist samurais that drug traffick in Brazil to sell this thing? No. All I need now is a job in Hollywood and that writing gig is mine.

Last, but not least, APE is two days away. Tomorrow night I am on the midnight train to SF, where the new guitarist and I will be taking up residence on fellow semi-blogger Pachoob's floor. Pachoob, I apologize in advance for the short, bearded guy that will be coming up with me. He's a pistol, but an all around great guy. If you so feel the need to smack him, please do so. He loves that kind of stuff.

Until next time, my comic book loving internet friends..

What I read last week

2007-04-16T11:23:00.000-07:00

Army @ Love # 1

I had high hopes for this. I have enjoyed most of the stuff I have read from Rick Vietch and was looking forward to a Vertigo book that seemed as if it would capture some of the 90's Vertigo spirit. Where I am a fan of Veitch's sophisticated work on Swamp Thing and Question, I find myself a little put off by the over-the-top gratituitous nature of his Maximortal and Bratpack. Unfortunately, that is the category that Army @ Love falls into. Soldiers fighting a pointless battle that leads to a pointless sex scene that is being sold as an attempt to advance the plot. Since the plot is a bit weak, it only comes off as empty shock value. And not that shock value for the sake of just being shocking is bad, I was expecting a little bit more. Its only the first issue, so things can definitely turn around. Until it does, I will leave it up to others to figure it out and let me know accordingly.

Dark Tower: Gunslinger Born # 3

On the third issue, Dark Tower: Gunslinger Born has paid off very well. Jae Lee does a fantastic job as always with Richard Isanove complimenting his style perfectly on colors. The script is solid, too. I am a bit of a sucker for that whole post-apocalyptic low tech future setting thanks to quite a few years sitting at a table, rolling dice, and consuming large amounts of Coca-Cola in my teenage years. My friend, who is a huge Dark Tower fan loved the first two issues that I gave to him to read. Myself, I stayed away from Stephen King, due to a series of horrendous straight-to-TV movies that were spat out back in the 90's. I know, its dumb, but that's how do sometimes. But you put a Stephen King book into comic form and sure enough, I will pick it up and read it. That's the power of comics for ya! When this is done, I will probably borrow my friend's books to see what the hoohah is all about.

Iron Fist # 4

Best damn superhero/kung fu book on the shelf. If you are not reading this, you are killing comics. Fraction and Bru are doing a bang up job, with Aja kicking ass on art. And the guest artists are awesome. Whoever thought a dude wearing ballet slippers could be so cool?

Madman Atomic Comics # 1

This is the first Madman comic I have ever read and I want to apologize for that. When I was reading X-men comics, I was sleeping on what is such a fun book. Mike Allred can draw something fierce and his wife does such a great job of polishing it all up for all of us to enjoy. Now I just need to find a way to scrounge up $175 just so I can buy that huge book that's coming out soon. This book is all catch up, which is fine for me because I am totally in the dark about the world of Madman and found myself quite surprised on what has been going on in his neck of the woods. Solid stuff, my friends. Get it!

Brownsville TPB

Jewish gangsters set in 1930's New York. I love the crime genre, but this one takes a lot of the conventions associated with your typical mafia story and replace the italians with jews. And the art. Its not bad, but I could never tell anyone apart from each other. Being in black & white definitely did not help. If you are big on the mobster scene, this might do something for you. If you're smart, you will heed my sage-like advice and pass it up for something with a little more substance and originality.

Ode To Kirihito TPB

This blew me away. An 800 page medical/horror drama from the Godfather of Manga himself, Osamu Tezuka. I read it in two days. The visual tricks alone that Tezuka employs are worth the book alone. The book's style stay well within his classical early Disney influenced style as seen by most in Astro Boy, but breaks away into a more detailed form that jumps closer to photo-realism at just the right moment. This carries a real huge emotional impact at times as issues of racism, fear, and treachery run rampant through out the book. A young doctor goes to investigate a rural japanese village where some of the denizens are mysteriously turning into dog-like humanoids that eventually die. Once he gets there, the adventure and intrigue start up and it keeps going from there. Doctors squabble about the right away to cure the condition while victims confront the world that does not understand them. Things get pretty weird in this book. It suffers slightly from using rape as a motivater for the male protagonists which is the only short-coming of the book. Other than that, its a brilliant piece of work that has got me interested in reading some of Tezuka's other work.

Enlist or Die!

2007-04-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

BeaucoupKevin has this new forum and in that forum, he has started The Comic Book Club. What is The Comic Book Club? Its a place where we pick a comic book and discuss it. Pretty nifty, huh. Right now we got the first six issues of Watchmen set up to be dissected and discussed. I think I am out of the running on that one because someone bored my trade and never gave it back! There's a poll on the next book we are going to talk about with DMZ currently in the lead. I am not a big fan of DMZ, BUT it should be an interesting discussion that will hopefully not degenerate into me calling everyone else tasteless monkey rapers. Of Course, Yeah! favorite Jason has signed up. Why don't you?

by Johnny Hart

2007-04-09T07:24:00.000-07:00

A little known fact is that the "comic strip" is one of three art forms that our infant nation has offered to the world. The second, I am told, is "jazz." The third escapes me, although I suspect that it is "rebellion."

As far back as I care to remember, I drew funny pictures, which got me in or out of trouble depending on the circumstances. A certain amount of prominence and popularity resulted, which, I guess, is what I was after all the time.

My formal education ended abruptly when I graduated from Union-Endicott High School. School was different in those days; they taught softly but carried a big strap. Nowadays you can bad-mouth the teachers. In my day you resorted to placing reptiles in their drawers, which was pretty risky because sometimes they were wearing them.

Soon after I had reached the age of nineteen, a young cartoonist named Brant Parker became a prime influence in my life. In one quick evening we met, became great friends, and began a relationship which would one day culminate in a joint effort called The Wizard of Id. Brant imparted to me, with remarkable insight and perception, the essence of all that he had absorbed from the practical application and study of his craft.

To this point in my life I had never really considered cartooning as a profession, but in the years to follow, it became a driving force, seemingly etched in my subconscious from that meeting with Brant Parker.

My application for enrollment in the fraternity of comic heroes arrived in April, 1954, on a small farm in Georgia, when my wife, Bobby, came screaming from the mailbox with a sale from the Saturday Evening Post. We danced and sang and gorged ourselves on a chocolate cake which Bobby's mother whomped up for the occasion. Many magazine sales followed, but not with the frequency which is essential to sustain life. Two years in the art department with General Electric returned Bobby and me to a more substantial diet.

I continued my submssions to the magazines, utilizing those quiet hours when normal people slumber. Caveman gags, for reasons which I still cannot explain, were an obsession of mine in those days, although I must reluctantly confess that I have not sold a caveman gag to a magazine to this date.

During my two years with GE, I began to read with astonishment a comic strip called Peanuts by Charles M. Schulz. His sense of humor and my own seemed remarkably similar, which inspired me to attempt a comic strip, "I shall repair to my domicile this evening a create a nationally famous comic strip." I announced to my cronies. "Why don't you make a caveman strip?" said one wag. "You can't seem to sell them anywhere else!"

So I did.

B.C. was rejected by five major syndicates before it was accepted. Two years after B.C. began, I created The Wizard of ID, which lay dormant for several years thereafter. I mentioned it to Brant Parkers and asked him if he would be willing to take on the job of illustrating it. To my delight he consented. Brant and I threw the Wizard together during three wild days and nights in a small, dank New York hotel room, taping the finished drawings to the walls as we completed them. When the walls were filled, we called the syndicate and asked them if they would like to see a new strip. They said they would. The men from the syndicate arrived earlier than we had anticipated, finding Brant barefoot and shirtless and me in my shorts shaving off a three-day beard. Ignorning us, they edged their way around the walls and scrutinized our efforts, scuffing away an occasional beer bottle as they went.

When they had finished, they seated themselves about the room amidst the rubble and eyed us carefully. "We think you're disgusting, but the strip is great," they said. "We'll take it!"

Ideas are commonplace. We all have them. What do with them is another thing. I had trouble for many years trying to come up with them because I needed them for my work. Then one day it occurred to me that it is impossible to run out of ideas...and...I...*GAD*...

- Johnny Hart, The Comics: An Illustrated History of Comic Strip Art, 1974

Rest In Peace, Johnny.

My name is Spencer Carnage and I endorse this website

2007-04-06T08:28:00.000-07:00

Fist-a-cuffs. You go now.

Super huh?

2007-04-05T13:06:00.000-07:00

Its been, what, a week? Sorry, mis amis.....been straying away from the super hero funny books, trying to get up on the smarty arty tip! You heard correct! I'ma talking about Original Graphic Novellas! Capeless genre excursions! Dirty, ugly crime noir and French Science Fictions! Even Manga! Books with bare boobs in 'em!

COMIX!!!

Its a breathe of fresh air. Let me tell YOU. Right now, I could give two shakes of a lamb's tail about the death of the Living Legend, Captain America. I'll pour my footy out for ya, dawg, but I don't need to pay you no nevermind just because Marvel wants to sell some books!

I have traveled to a world where teenage sex can rearrange your DNA! I stood next to private dick, Jacob Marlowe, while he beat goons up and spit mysognistic game on dames! I was there to witness some drama on the cliff, German stylee!! Like some sick, fetishistic voyeur, I watched Anders Nilson's life fall completely apart!! I traded blows with the Itto Ryu!!!!

I can't tell you how much more I have enjoyed my comic book reading experience when it doesn't involve allusions to Captain America not really being dead or neo-fascoheroism. I think its safe to say that it has affected my blogging a little bit, especially when you stop to consider that I am only good at blogging when it involves some facet of the Marvel U. that I dislike.

Don't worry, though. I'll still be hating! What's the point of being 1 of 6 Marvel bloggers if you ain't gonna complain about it!? Just bear with me, Fearless Readers! I may have been busy lately, but I still be around. I still gotta show you all how the Beyonder parties!

Stay tuned!

I'm going to APE!

2007-03-29T16:28:00.000-07:00

I need to go. If there ever was a time to mosy on out of town for a weekend, it is now. If there ever was a good place to go, it would San Francisco for the Alternative Press Expo.

Anyone else going? Maybe someone that's local? If so, you wanna hang out? Maybe let me sleep over and keep you up late with my extensive knowledge of the Wildstorm Universe?

I want to go to this SOOO bad and it would be awesome to meet up with some new people along the way. If you want to bring some sunshine to this redhead's life, please email me at spencercarnage@gmail.com and we can work some shit.

First 3 beers are on me!

The Agony Of A Pull-List

2007-03-29T11:57:00.000-07:00

Taking a page from Jason's blog, I have decided to do my own little break down of what goes into putting together a pull-list. Unlike the Jason, the process itself is a bit grueling. A lot of the titles that I used to pull have recently fallen out of favor with me. And the ones I do like are either being put out bi-annually or on the cusp of being wrapped up. There is also the waiting-for-trade factor. I could never justify to myself that purchasing a movie 15 minutes at a time is a smart thing to do, therefore, why do the same for comic books?

With that being said, here's a little insight into what I am going to pulling and why.

MUST-HAVES

All Star Superman: Morrison and Quietly can do no wrong. Expect that whole lateness thing. We can overlook that aspect of things.

Astonishing X-men: We are, what...two issues away from finishing this up? Its beyond good, but its nostalgia wank off material through and through. But dayum...... that Cassidy dude can illustrate something fierce!

Astro City: I finally read the first three trades this past summer. All I can say is phenomonal. Dark Age is slowly making its way out and the issue I read has still got me interested in it. Kurt Busiek is completely ruly.

Doctor Frankenstein: High concept all the way. Not as funny as Shaolin Cowboy, but the action is definitely there. At one point, Frank beats up a werewolf and all her pups in a sequence that was quite well done. This might be wrapped, on hiatus, taking forever, I don't remember.

Iron Fist: The best book to come out from Marvel last year. Finally, we have an Iron Fist comic to be proud of. Fighting off the agents of Hydra, both as Danny Rand the entrepreneur and Iron Fist, the Fist on Knonshu. Great stuff.

New Warriors: I have to get this. If anything, just to give me a reason to further show the world the only redeeming thing to come out of comics in '91 and '92 was New Warriors vol 1., #s 1 through 25.

Nova: Nova's my dawg! What?!

Planetary: Only one issue to go, right? Nevermind that its turned into a slow burn. Nevermind that lackluster ending. Nevermind that it Hailey's Comet has been spotted 3 times since the last issue hit the stands. Its Planetary. If you do not know what that really means, Warren Ellis hates you. More than he already did.

Shaolin Cowboy: Its awesome cubed. Geof Darrow is just bedazzling. That's right. I said it: bedazzling. The talent of his art combined with his humor will blow your mind. And not some Chris Sims' "Batman punching a dog" blow your mind, but jive-talking demons trying to rustle up on the Shaolin Cowboy while he is being pursued by a baby with bloody hands that keeps saying "mine!" over and over again kind of blow your mind. You have to read it to love it. It also has a talking horse. Or maybe he's a mule. Either way, talking horses/mules are the new monkey. I think its on hiatus, but when it was going, it was bi- or tri-monthly. Something aggravating like that.

Stray Bullets: Nevermind that it only comes out once a year. David Lapham will always rule and this book, as weird as it can get sometimes, is worth the wait. This is one of the books that I will buy monthly and then randomly pick up a TPB so I can reread it in a convenient manner. Thanks to that consumer strategy, David Lapham can afford to get cheese with that hamburger.

Wintermen: Hey, look! Its another semi-annual-if-you're-lucky comic book! Wintermen. Boy, do I love this comic. Trying to sum it up for those who most likely have not read it yet is hard. Ex-Cold War Russian Superhumans turned quasi-policemen/criminals, walking what's left of the Soviet beat. One issue, our protagonist is sent to Brooklyn to track down a superhuman child that was kidnapped by radioactive organ dealers, another issue its business as usual for some crooked cops trying to get by in Mother Russia. John Paul Leon's(Earth X) line heavy, photo-realistic art style is perfect for Brian Lewis's script. The dialogue reads as close to Russian-translated-into English as you can get it. None of what I just said probably made any sense, unless you have read and liked Wintermen. If so, then you too know the pain that is enjoying something so much, even if you don't really know what you just read.

X-men: Best X-book on the stands. I know, its crazy, but it is. Carey and crew have made me care about a bunch of X-men that I pretty much wrote off a long time ago. Even Cable! He has brought the mutant baby from the future back to his roots which is a dude with a bunch fo guns that also happens to be a mutant. That's okay with me. And Bachalo? Your confuso-vision art styles is giving me wood. Like that one scene when Northstar super-speed pummeled the Astonishing X-men? Fan-tast-ick. Let's just hope that this summer's X-crossover doesn't blow this whole thing for all of us.

MAYBES

Captain America: This is a solid book. But then they killed Steve Rogers. Things will be interesting, but I have this feeling that owning the trade will better choice.

Countdown: With Paul Dini, this could be really good. I didn't pick up 52, but I always read the weekly column over at Newsarama.

Daredevil: Another great book that screams "Buy The Trade!" at me. I loved the Prison arc, but I felt that it was written for the trade. If that's the case, why bother with single issues?

New Avengers: As much as I say I hate this book and what's it done to my sleeping habits, I still continue to pick it up. When I go a month or two without it, I feel like I finally beat Athlete's Foot. Then I see it and I get that itch again.....

Brian Michael Bendis has some really good ideas floating around this book. Its the execution that's lacking. Punching and blasting has been replaced with quiping and blabbering. The past few issues have been a little better in that department, but we are dealing with this Ronin crap. Bendis comes up with a half-way decent idea but ends up shooting himself in the foot. Bringing the Sentry into the Marvel U.? Not a bad idea. Just make sure you get rid of him for when the ninjas show up. Introduce a mysterious ninja-Avenger and have everybody guessing? Why not. Its comics. Dumb things are SUPPOSED to happen like that. Let's try and refrain from the whole "She's a he!" for obvious reasons. Resolve this Xorn thing once and for all? Not a bad idea, but good luck. Wait, what did I just read? Its fan-fiction in the worst way. Reading it, I tend to find myself wanting to either rewrite it myself or at least explain certain things that should have been explained. If there was a way that Bendis could read this without using his message board as the gauge of whether or not its good, we might be okay. I want to like it, but he's making it so hard.

World War Hulk: Romita rules and Pak has been more than decent on some of the stuff I have read. But is a crossover, which will probably force into making some Get Your World War Hulk On jokes....and that's not so good, now is it.

Having typed all of that, I am coming up with one conclusion: superhero comics just ain't what they used to be. Its such a commitment that hardly pays off as much as I pay out. And the ones that do pay off, make me waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit forever and are probably further away from super hero comics that your average spandex book.

Have superhero comics abandoned me or have I abandoned superhero comics? Or am I just reading the wrong comics? Is possible that I choose the wrong side and that I might be much happier in a shared universe with multiple earths and youthful wards? Should I stop posing in front of the mirror in tights and start gazing down in that there inny/outy navel of mine? Is turning Japanese the answer? Can Manga help me hug it out with this adolescent power fantasy that hides inside of me? Should I even bother with a pull list? If I can't even commit to a monthly pull, how could I possibly commit myself to other aspects of my life? Will I die alone, with only a bunch of long boxes filled with incomplete runs of my favorite comics to my name?

If there was a soundtrack to my life, it would be playing Soul Asylum's Runaway Train on continuous loop right about now....

Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here no there

Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded.....

Why I Want To Read World War Hulk

2007-03-28T12:31:00.000-07:00

SPENCER-HULK SMASH!!!!!!

TALK-SPLODE: 0!!! FANBOY RAMPAGE: 1!!!

PUNY STARK!!! WHOSE SIDE SPENCER-HULK ON?!?!? CAPTAIN AMERICA'S SIDE!!! THAT'S WHO!!! HOW DARE YOU RAPE SPENCER-HULK'S CHILDHOOD!?!?!?

SPENCER-HULK UNDERSTAND THAT YOU WERE TOO INVOLVED IN COMPLICATED X-CONTINUITY TO TAKE PART IN SPENCER-HULK BEING SENT TO SPACE, PROFESSOR X!!! SPENCER-HULK JUST NOT LIKE MUTIES!!! BLAME WOLVERINE!!!

SPENCER-HULK MAN ENOUGH TO DANCE WITH 'NOTHER MAN!!! SPENCER-HULK SEXUALLY SECURE!!!

BAH!!! SPENCER-HULK GET ALL HIS NEWS ONLINE!!!

REGISTER THIS, STUPID POST CIVIL WAR MARVEL U!!!

SPENCER-HULK SMASH!!!!!!!!!

You guys and gals get off easy today

2007-03-22T14:08:00.000-07:00

I had this huge, idiotic rant all ripe and ready and decided against being that guy. Instead, you get a link or five:

Techno Tuesdays. I love this guy's humor. And look at that; he ain't such a bad artist neither.

Go buy stuff at Meathaus's sale. Start with Meathaus Issue 8: Headgames, continue with some Gongwanadon, and finish up with whatever else strikes your fancy.

Idolator's Top 30 songs for Guitar Hero III. I pretty much agree with most of their list. It has Megadeth's "Holy Wars" at # 2, with Prince, Living Colour, and Guns N' Roses in the top ten as well. They also forgot to include Slayer's "War Ensemble" and Refused's "New Noise" but that's okay.

Don't ever spend any amount of time skipping around the Marvel Database or UncannyX-men.net. For reasons I will not discuss here, I did just that. What's wrong with me?

Of Course, Yeah! favorite Earth 2 Leigh is back, but I'm convinced he has been replaced with a version from other alternate earth. I haven't figured out which one that is, though.

Another, newer favorite of mine, Jason, just hooked me up with some linkage, so I'm going to do the same. By declaring that I will be stealing his recent Anatomy of a Pull-List post as my own some time in very near future. Thanks, Jason!

Go on! Leave me alone already!

The results are in!

2007-03-20T16:17:00.000-07:00

It is official. I have become Internet Famous.

No, not because I harped some dude's comic strip for my own. And not because I have such great taste in comics and can blog with the best them. Though those are all great things, they are not what it takes to become Internet Famous. The road to becoming internet famous is a tricky one. It involves lots of comment spamming, bloggable ass kissing, and linking, linking and more linking. Oh, let us not forget, a strong passion for the baddest dude to ever bring a skateboard to super hero fight. Ever.

Wikipedia has cited my Night Thrasher = Badical as a reference for the entry on the character. Yes, you read correct.

Wika.

Pedia.

Loves.

Spencer Carnage.

I think I'm going to head on over to the Girl-Wonder.org and use my newfound celebrity to see if any nerdy chicks wanna cyber with me. Ciao.

The Complete Terry And The Pirates

2007-03-20T12:03:00.000-07:00

From the Beat:

Celebrating the centennial of Milton Caniff ’s birth, IDW Publishing will publish a fully authorized six-book series collecting the entirety of Caniff ’s groundbreaking newspaper adventure strip Terry and the Pirates. The Sunday pages will be reproduced in their original color, alongside the daily black-and-white strips.

No cartoonist has so heavily influenced his medium as has Milton Caniff, and no comic strip has had more imitators than Terry and the Pirates. He is considered the great American novelist of the comics medium.

It comes with a hefty price tag of $49.99. That is a lot of comics right there. I have read a wee bit in the Comics Strip book, however, I am not entirely sure if I am $49.99 ready. There are those Steve Canyon books that I could start with. If Steve Canyon turns out to be good, maybe I can re-consider this "No Selling Internal Organs On The Black Market To Fund My Comic Reading Habits" policy.

Related: An essay by Milton Caniff from Comic Strips

At the end of this post, there will be a test

2007-03-19T14:02:00.000-07:00

Captain America is sad. Why?

A.) Spider-woman suffers from severe Scoliosis
B.) Spider-woman is bulemic
C.) The wings on his head are small and therefore unmanly
D.) His left eye is closer to his nose than the right eye
E.) Correct anatomy and composition is skill that is not necessary to become a fan-favorite comic book artist
F.) He is dead
G.) All of the above

No cheating!

Wizard World Los Angeles

2007-03-19T11:44:00.000-07:00

I did not attend. I would have liked to, but decided against it for fear of attacking whichever panelist were attending the Marvel panel while screaming "Whose side are YOU on?!? I'm with the Marvel readers, what about you!?!!?" That and spending way too much money on crap that I probably do not need. I didn't even get a chance to go to that party at Melt Comics on Friday night which I blame on a combination of friends that lagged, LA Traffic, and Super Bust-A-Move. But one of these years, I am going to make it to one of these funny book cons. Instead of attending the WWLA X-men panel on saturday night, I got drunk at a dive bar in Ventura and had the fortunate pleasure of watching some guy pull a gun out and shoot it at the ground in order to keep his would-be attackers from attacking him. Breaking Marvel's no-smoking a policy, I just exhaled and said "Did that just happen?" Yes, Spencer, it did. Huh.

Thankfully in my absence, my fellow Marvelites were there to pick up the slack and ask the hard questions for all of us.

"When Scarlet Witch said no more mutants, does that mean no more future mutants?"

Let's hope so. That over-populated mutant community was really pissing me off. Try to keep it manageable!

"Will we ever find out who Lalya Miller's parents are?"

I am, like all of us, on pins and needles waiting to see what's up with THAT mystery.

"How can there still be a school with so few mutants?"

And can a mutant still major in Cable's Closed Fist philosophy with a minor in Blackbird Piloting?

"Will Wolverine Origins ever be good?"

Seems like somebody is reading a different Wolverine Origins than I am.

"Anything on X-Force?"

Specifically with Rob Liefeld attached. And Cable. And Shatterstar. If you could bring Gideon & Stryfe back, that would be AWESOME.

"Is Jean Grey actually dead or are you going to 'pull a Colossus'?"

And do we have to suffer through anymore of those Phoenix Emosong minis?

"What's going on with Gambit?"

If he comes back, will he still say 'Mon Ami' a hella bunches? And will he get all creepy with a young X-men like he did with the age regressed Storm?

"What was the reasoning behind making Wolverine's son completely evil, and what's up with his haircut?"

Its like I was sitting in the audience and asking the questions myself! But I wasn't! That's the magic of comic books!

"Are you guys going to be doing anything with Sunspot?"

And Gideon? He has a green ponytail and wears metal on his arm! And runs a foundation!

”Are you going to bring back Jean Grey as the Phoenix? It's getting a little tiring that she keeps dying and getting brought back."

Seriously! I mean, how many times can she rise from the ashes and make Scott doubt his love?! Give the guy a break already!

Well met, my fine fellow Marvel fans. You did a great job in voicing the concerns that all of us X-men fans currently face when reading about our favorite mutants. However, you missed out some important questions that I still need answers to.

When will Storm get her mohawk back?
Can we get more Nanny and Orphan Maker action soon?
How exactly will you go about breaking Professor X's legs THIS time?
Is Wolverine still the best there is at what he does?
And is what he does still not very pretty?
Who would win in a fight between Wolverine and Thanos?
What about Thanos when he has the Infinity Gauntlet and Wolverine is in the middle of a "berzerker" rage?
Will Wolverine ever say "Berzerker Barrage!" and "Real Claw!" in the comic while eviscerating his enemies like he does in the Marvel vs. Capcom video game?
Can we get a Marvel vs. Capcom comic book already?
Any chance of seeing a Lockheed & Lockjaw cross-over anytime soon?
And can we please, please, please....get more X-men-lounging-by-the-pool action? Pretty pretty please?

Please feel free to leave your answers in the comments, Mr. Schmidt. Thank you.

Booze 'n Comics

2007-03-16T16:44:00.000-07:00

I think I should be attending this tonight. Yes. Yes, I should.

I'm breaking free, baby!

2007-03-15T12:11:00.000-07:00

Comics. Let's just say that them pesky funny books and I are not getting along so well right now. Some might be quick to point out the reasons for that being that I am spending too much time with super heroes. And by reading this blog, you probably might be right in thinking that. But guess what? You are wrong, my friend(s)! Over the past few months, I have read Miss, The Clouds Above, Exterminators Vol. 2, BWS Storyteller: Freebooters, Jonah Hex Vol. 1, the complete Fables collection, and the first couple issues of Vol 1. of the Essential Tomb Of Dracula. There was a few super hero trades in the mix, namely the Daredevil Visionaires that Frank Miller did, along with a Spider-man: Round Robin. A year ago, that would have taken place over the course of two weeks. These days, I'm lucky if I hit those numbers in two months.

Regardless, I am a bit burnt out on comics right now. So I'm not reading them. You heard me. No comics.* For really reals. At least not until I read me a book or two. You remember books, right? The bastard step-brother of the Graphic Novel? They have a picture on the cover, but that's it? Yes. Those things. To start it off, I am finally going to finish Michael Chabon's The Amazing Adventures Of Kavalier & Clay which I have been slowly making my way through for the past two years. I know, its ridiculous because it is such a damn good book, that no matter how much I enjoy it, I also find myself putting it down so I can finish that New Excalibur trade I just bought the week before. Imagine that? Comics made me not want to read! Preposterous!

Now that the War is over, I am getting back to my civilian life. Starting with Kavalier & Clay. I am going to finish this fine book. After that? Well, you tell me. Suggest me a book. Any book. I'm leaning towards Fortress Of Solitude or You Don't Love Me by Jonathan Lethem, but I am open to more suggestions. And they don't even have to be semi-comic book related like Chabon and Lethem's works are.

Suggest a book for me!

* I will still be reading the Comic Strips book I have which is really still comics, even if its just a book about comics. And if Wintermen comes out with a new issue, I'll read that, too. Also, I might go WWLA this year, so that means I'll have to buy comics which tends to force me to read them. Just don't quote me on that "no comics!" bit and we should be fine.

Some days you just have to take a break...

2007-03-14T16:22:00.000-07:00

Would you believe me if I said that Mighty Avengers # 1 was so bad that it caused me to NOT blog for a few days? Because it did, for reasons including, but not limited to:

Whatshisface isn't all that good unless he's drawing biggums and booties. His monsters are neat, but other than that, yawn!

That new SHIELD Iron-Carrier. Ug meet Lee! Are they really trying to do that? First you have to ruin Spider-man's costume and now one of the most awesomest flying bases ever? Really, Mr. Stark? I imagine you signing on to SHIELD meant they had to change the colors on that bird logo to Gold and Red, huh.

Bendis's hella lame use of thought balloons. Its like taking his "realistic" dialogue to the next level. Instead of having to read the spoken "ums...", "well, uhs...", and "(wows.)", I get to peer into the mind of Carol Danvers as she THINKS them! Shoot me now!

Sultron 2.ooooooh...this gives me a weird feeling that sometime in the very near future I am going to be turned on by a female Egghead.

Its like they don't want me to buy comics sometimes!

What's up with the blog?

2007-03-09T11:42:00.000-08:00

I was all intent to keep my live blogging of Jerry Robinson's excellent The Comics coming at ya on the weekly day basis. Honestly, I was. I still plan to as there is way too much stuff in there that I need to share with everyone, like Alex Raymond's Secret Agent X-9, Ham Fisher's Joe Palooka, the woman's increasing contribution to comic strips as both characters and creators, and those wonderful essays by creators such as Charles Schultz, Chic Young, Hal Foster, and Walt Kelly that are sprinkled throughout the book. They are all coming. I just need to make some time and sit myself down in front of a scanner.

And as of this weekend, I am back to buying comic books on a semi-regular basis so expect an idiotic thought or two on things like muscles and spandex.

The Forbidden Planet blog has a little bit about the comic adaptation for William Gibson's Neuromancer which was put out by Epic Comics back in the eighties. I absolutely love William Gibson. I first read Neuromancer in 9th grade and have read pretty much everything he has done. The scans are not the best, but here they are.

After a week or so, I see that I am still on Dick's enemy list. Surprisingly enough, my little rant about kids and continuity somehow failed to make his itinerary of things to "HATE" on. Maybe I should comment further on Civil War? Think that will get him to stomp his feet? Like maybe if I said that the problem with Civil War is Mark Millar's inability to stray away from the overuse of splash pages lead to precious amounts of screen time for character development being left on the cutting room floor. Because really, less character development/explanation and more splash pages CAPTAIN AMERICA FREERIDING THEM F-16 SONS OF BITCHES THROUGH SHIELD HEADQUARTERS is exactly what makes a damn good comic book.

A friend of mine that had the chance to read some of the Civil War scripts early last summer told me how Mark Millar would state something to the effect of "Oi! This Splash page will fetch ye' a fine 'mount of quid! Wot, wot!" Its very gracious for the artist he works with, giving them scripts with one and two page splashs that they can turn around and sell for trillions of dollars. Unfortunately, we seem to have found ourselves with the MOST! IMPORTANT! MARVEL! STORY! EVER! that has left out any possibility at being a decent story so we could have some more Where's Waldo-ish two page spreads.

Now that I got rant out of the way, I can make good on this newfound "enemy" status, because damn it, son, I NEED THOSE HITS.

Last night my friend and I were discussing the death of Captain America over dinner. In our somewhat stunned, exaggerated reactions to the shocking event, my girlfriend gave us some sound advice on how to deal with such tragedy that I now extend to my dear friends on the internet:
"Oh god! You boys are so stu-pid! You're crying over Captain freakin' America, a fictional character! You KNOW he is going to come back! I mean, come on!!"

It helps if you read it with the same kind of inflection that a girl from The Hills or Laguna Beach would use.

But enough about my significant other. What about yours? Did s/he console you with flowers? Insult you with stupid remarks? Let you buy one extra book at the comic shop because you were sad that Captain America was all shot up?

How have you spent the past few days mourning the loss of an American Legend?

Here we go again....

2007-03-07T13:53:00.000-08:00

Convuluted, confusing continuity is killing our chances at getting new readers! How in the world will we ever jump on if Marvel and DC will not sit still for one damn moment!?

Excuse me while I breath a sigh of slight annoyance. I absolutely love Heidi's blog, along with a lot of the people that share the same opinions that she has, however I beg to differ on at least one point: Continuity-driven comics are not the problem.

The problem is getting kids to pick up comics. Once we figure out which magic bullet that is, continuity will not be a road block. If anything, it will sell more comics, just like it does now for the established fan base. If kids want it enough, they will wade through an ocean of back issues to get the stories they want to read. And they will enjoy doing so. If the mainstream super hero comics ever manage to find themselves on the kids' radar, floppies and graphic novels will fly off of the shelf, with continuity driving a significant portion of those sales.

Have you looked a child's room lately? Most, if not all, are littered with toys that all most likely share a common brand and/or theme. My nephew went crazy over Thomas The Tank Engine and did everything in his power to let everyone in our family know that when it comes time to buy him something, buy him Thomas The Tank Engine. Kids are completists. My best friend's daughter needs to have anything and everything with Disney's Princesses on it. If she was old enough to read and there was a comic book for the Disney Princess characters, she would have it already along with every back issue and trade that she could convince her parents to buy for her. Instead of the Disney Princesses comic, she has books. Kids want to have each and every thing of whatever it is they are obsessed with. If that obsession turned to Civil War, you can bet your sweet ass they would get every tie-in they could. What they could not get, they would read right off of the rack. I know I did.

Another similiar argument I hear alot on the internet is how the movie version and comic book version do not completely match up. Its an interesting argument, but one I disagree with completely. The first comic book I read was a GI Joe comic. I was eight years old and completely in love with the cartoon and the toys. The thought of reading the GI Joe comic book never crossed my mind until my 6 year old friend and neighbor asked for me to help him read it. After reading that issue, I started collecting the comic on the regular basis. At no point did the fact that the comic book and the cartoon did not completely match up hinder my ability to enjoy it. I might have asked myself "where's Cobra La from the cartoon? How come the Cobra Commander/Fred storyline in the comic isn't discussed on TV? And what about those space monsters and the black pyramid?" at least once, but that was a one time thing only. Maybe I was some kind of freak occurence in the realm of kids that read comics back in the 80s, but I doubt it. Any disconnect between the comics themselves and their TV and/or movie versions will probably do little to dissuaded a determined child. If kids want it, they will get it. In the long run, they will probably enjoy the comic book much more because it does not have to undergo the same creation-by-commitee problems that plague other forms of media.

Using the complaint "the continuity is too complicated" and "this media version does not match up with this media version" when describing the problems with getting kids to read comic books are completely off base and do nothing but show how completely out of touch you are. Passing off your bias towards super hero comics that exist in a shared universe as the reason why kids are not buying comic books is not an accurate assessment of the situation.

In my opinion, the main problem that the Big Two face in regards to continuity is not that they are a slave to it, but the fact that they are doing such a piss poor job at making it work. Continuity should never trump a good story. However, if you feel the need to play with Stan's toys, please understand that its a borrowed toy that you have to share with not only other creators but with the readers, too. The reason why Fabian Nicenza's Cable & Deadpool and The New Thunderbolts CW tie-in issues were so well received from both new and old readers was because Nicenza understands the nature of his job as work-for-hire at Marvel Comics, allowing for him to manuever his way around editorially interference and still tell the story he wants to tell. Continuity, if used currently, can only enrich the reading experience. I imagine that all that continuity that comes with Dragonball Z (this generation's Akira) does nothing but sell more volumes of Dragonball Z as the kids struggle to learn about their beloved Goku and his great, big extended family.

If Marvel was smart, they would have put those Ultimates and Iron Man cartoons on the Cartoon Network. Watching Ultimate Captain America beat the hell out of some bad guys was exactly what I and every other kid I knew growing up would have loved to do on a friday night. As a few bloggers can atest to, the Marvel and DC cartoons of the 90s helped get them into comics. GI Joe is what did it for me. I am almost positive that a good number of manga bloggers can point to the japanese animation cartoons from the late 90's and early 00's as to what helped them make the leap.

At some point, the kids will come back. Give them time. It may not be this huge exodus that people are clamoring for, but they will come. Once they are hooked, they will swim circles around things like continuity. There is a CGI movie with Ninja Turtles right around the corner. Whoever has the comic book license for that property would be very smart to give away free copies of a newly launched TMNT to every child that comes through those doors because if there is one thing that little kids love its god damn ninjas and CGI characters.

Do you think this 'A' stands for __________?!?!

2007-03-07T09:29:00.000-08:00

Oooh. Now this seems a little exciting. It was about time someone offed that "old bird." Now the thing about death in super hero comics is that blah blah blah things never change, etc., etc., leaving us with the one important question:

Who gonna be the next guy to fight for our freedoms?! Let us take a look and see what the future may hold...

Punisher as Captain America
This is a no-brainer. I certainly do not expect any kind of lasting change in direction for the Punisher, however there is at least a story arc or two in the works. Throw in the fact that Fraction and Brubaker hold the Comic Book Highschool award for "Two Creators Most Likely To Spoon With Each Other In A Crowded San Diego Hotel Room" and its an absolute guarantee. It probably wouldn't be half bad, either.

The US Agent as Captain America
Its been done before so why not do it again? With Mr. Walker up in Canada as the US Agent, keeping tabs on them damn mounties, it probably safe to say that he will stay out of this one. And really, that is just old ground that we do not need to revisit.

The Winter Solder as Captain America
Another interesting possibility. It would help the Winter Soldier on his path of redemption as well as tap into the legacy aspect of his character. I personally feel it would be too soon as we are just getting to know this new Bucky. He will probably stay as the Winter Soldier for the time being.

The Falcon As Captain America
This would be so bitchin' wicked awesome kick ass hella duper cool because a black Captain America would rule so much for so many reasons that may or may not include a gazillion message boarders wigging the hell out over it. Please, Marvel. If anything, make Falcon Captain America. If there is one guy that would stand up and make sure the legacy of Captain America got handled like it properly should be handled, its the Falcon. Did I mention that he's like this with birds? Suit that dude up, put a bald eagle on this shoulder and drop his ass into the Red Skull's lair and you quite possibly have the best super hero comic book of 2007.

I am so not kidding about this one.

On a somewhat related note...

While perusing that issue of New Avengers where Luke Cage kicks that ninja girl in the hoo hoo, I noticed a panel where this new Ronin character talks to Echo(who is OMG! SPOILERS! deaf) while wearing his or her mouthless Ronin mask. Um.....how exactly does that happen? Its a nit picky thing, but when you make a point of showing Peter Parker pulling his mask up because Ms. Lopez is all deafness, how you expect me to believe that Ronin does not need to do the same? Its reasons like this that make me loss sleep at night, Mr. Brian Michael Bendissssssssss!

Links For You To Click!

2007-03-05T14:02:00.000-08:00

I haven't had the chance to get any scans done this past weekend, therefore I'll pass on some links for you to enjoy.

Isotope, the best comic shop I've never been to, has an eight page preview of Italian cartoonist Gipi's painted Garage Band graphic novel from First Second books. The scans are not the best, but its enough to get me interested. As someone who has played in a garage band in one form or another for the past 9 years, this will definitely get a review from me. If anything, just to dispel the myth that playing in a band does NOT guarantee you copious access to girls' private parts.

His name is Joseph Bergin, the 3rd and his comics are hilarious. 1 to 4 panel gags that just burst with creative wit and style. Even when Bergin's on a bad day, he's good. If you hate stupid Livejournal, you can see some of his other stuff at his website.

Today's Inspiration is a great illustration blog focusing on art from the 40's and 50's, that is worth a look.

Brian + Spider-man Toys = Ha!

Best. Post. Ever. Really, though. Suck it up and get back to posting, already!

And here's some music for you to listen to: SOUND Team and fields. Their websites are a mite bit atrocious, but the jams are gooooooooood. SOUND Team has this semi-80s vocal vibe going on that really hits the right spots for me. Kind of like Oingo Boing/Bauhaus-ish, but with a little bit of grizzle to it. Listen to "Born To Please" and hopefully it will move you in the right places. As for fields, that's some straight wuss rock. Jangly folk guitars combined with drum machines, keys, male and female vocals and tales of sad, sad woe made me fall in love. "Brittlesticks" should bring the wuss right out of you.

Updating might be a bit sporadic the next few days for various boring reasons. Try not to jump off any cliffs or anything.

Zip!

2007-03-01T14:17:00.000-08:00

Gilbert Seldes, author of The Seven Lively Arts, called Krazy Kat the most amusing, fantastic, and satisfactory work of art produced in America. It was a strip of pure fantasy; the lush language was insane poetry. The ourageous love-hate tragic-farce took place on a surrealistic stage of sparse Western landscape: abstract cathedrallike mountains and mysterious vegetation, ever-changing and evolving, disappearing or suddenly springing from the void. Coconino County's basic characters were a cat (Krazy Kat), a mouse (Ignatz), and a cop (Offisa B. Pupp), and the basic props: a brick (from Kelly's Exclusive Brick Yard) and a jail. Ignatz was a mouse with a mission: to "Krease that Kat's bean with a brick." Offisa Pupp, Krazy's unrequited lover, regularly tossed Ignatz behind bars, despite the fact that to Krazy Kat each brick from the "li'l ainjil" was a missle of love. It could have been the eternal triangle except for Ignatz, the anarchist and cynic.
George Herriman created this classic comic in 1911, and it died with him in 1944. Krazy Kat never gained a large syndicated list of newspapers. Its appeal was apparently too intellectual. Among the Kat's avid collectors were the poet e. e. cummings and Woodrow Wilson, who refused to miss a single episode.

- Jerry Robinson, The Comics: An Illustrated History of Comic Strip Art, 1974

By Milton Caniff

2007-03-01T12:00:00.000-08:00

One day recently I drove past a house in which I had lived when I was ten--the site of my personal Ancient city where, years ago, I had built a metropolis along a dry gulch which edged the isolated dwelling in Redlands, California. My buildings were packing boxes of all sizes; the street vehicles and railway equipment were made from smaller cardboard containers, such as butter boxes. The nearby arroyos and canyons were choice hunting country, which my friends and I combed for used shotgun shells. The heavy caliber casings became men and the smaller gauges served as girls and women. The brass ends enabled the shells to stand upright.

Every activity in my city wa fully manned and ready for whatever the plot line of the Saturday and Sunday story called for. My hero was a bold venturer named Tom Martin (a nonethnic label--editorial caution came early!). There I would act out the villians and the good guys and plot devices against the sinister elements.

Drawing Steve Canyon stirs up recollections of the city I built long ago. The full-time catalyst of my resident company is Steve Canyon himself. In time, he taken unto himself a wife (following a goodly string of chicks in many parts of the world) and altered his life-style to conform to the accepted standards of home-delivered newspapers. When I move the focus to Poteet Canyon (Steve's onetime ward and kissin' cousin), another level of everyday life opens to the reader's eye. She is a newspaper reporter, a Libber, and a member of the singles' world so often in the news of the day. Leighton Olson (son of Steve's wife, Summer, by an earlier marriage) leads me in that turbulent area of the college set whose members work so hard at being identified by conformity.

After myriad devices to hold circulation in the competitive newspapers of the past, the hang-'em-on-the-cliff story cartoons are the only remains of the technique which sought to force the reader to come back the next day to learn what happened to the characters he has come to love or hate.

In a real sense we involve the reader as much as an audience participation show in the theater or on television. Our reader loyalty is less overt, but has a longer life expectancy. People never forget the first cartoon which broke through their consciousness.

My task is to combine the pleasures of yesterday with expectations of tomorrow and serve it up as the ten-cent black-and-white special available today. On Sunday, of course, there is color--for a slightly higher price.

- Milton Caniff, The Comics: An Illustrated History Of Comic Strip Art, 1974

Captain And The Kids

2007-03-01T08:00:00.000-08:00

Captain And The Kids by Rudolph Dirks, 1938

A New Art Form

2007-02-28T12:46:00.000-08:00

Hogan's Alley, R. F. Outcault, from the colored supplement of The World, May 17, 1896

The transistion into the twentieth century brought spectacular and profound changes to American soceity, changes that gave it vitality. It was the era of the Progressives and "Fighting Bob" La Follette; the bitter war against monopolies and trusts; Socialist, Suffragettes, and Society; Teddy Roosevelt; the Panama Canal; the Chautauqua; the nouveau riche and the American plutocracy; muckrakers, magnates, and Maxfield Parrish prints; technological explosion; the wonder of the cranked telephone; the magic of electric lights and the talking machine: with the fragile wax cylinder whirling, "...everyone works at our house but my ole man!"; Jack London, James J. Jeffries, and William Jennings Bryan; the horseless carriage giving way to the automobile; the miracle of moving pictures and the flight at Kitty Hawk. Above all, it was the era of European emigration of the Irish, Germans, Russians, Swedes, Italians, Catholics, and Jews--whose strange customs and accents were the delight of vaudeville comedians--all participating in the great, gorgeous, bubbling melting pot--the continuing American experiment.

This was the cultural stew that nourished a new American art form which proved to be of unprecedented vigor and longevity: the comic strip. William Laas in the Saturday Review Of Literature observed: "The comic strip is one of the liveliests cultural offshoots of our slam-bang civilization." America and the comic strip were made for each other.

- Jerry Robinson, The Comics: An Illustrated History Of Comic Strip Art

Image taken from The Yellow Kid On The Paper Stage website.

The Thrift Store Find Of The Week

2007-02-28T07:20:00.000-08:00

Q: What do you get when you spend ample amounts of time, rifling through other people's stuff, at various consignment and thrift stores?

A: Besides a new fangled hipster style, you also come across things like a Good to Very Good edition of Jerry Robinson's The Comics: An Illustrated History Of Comic Strip Art for under $2.

The Front Cover

The Back Cover

This thing is HUGE. You could use it to bludgeon someone to death. Hell, even Silver Age Baton Twirling Daredevil is dismayed by the size of the thing!

That's right. This gem from 1974 by the guy who created the Joker just fell into my lap. While looking for used Anne Rice vampire novels and Microwave cooking books, the words "The Comics" just shot out at me! At first, I was a bit dismayed because I couldn't see Spider-man or Superman anywhere on the cover, but I decided that anything by Jerry Robinson must involve at least one panel of a homo-erotic Golden Age Batman & Robin scene. So I bought the damn thing.

And take a look at who contributed to this book!

I don't even know who half of these people are, but at least one of them must have worked on an issue of the Avengers at SOME point in their life, right? Didn't the guy who created snoopy used to ghost for Jack Kirby on those monster books? Looks like we'll have to read the book to find out.

Jealous much, guys? I thought so!

Get Your Civil War On - The Confession

2007-02-27T10:05:00.000-08:00

Thank God we made it through that alive. Now that Civil War is done, so to can we put to rest Get Your Civil War On. Although it has been fun and probably made me laugh more than anyone else, this last round of scrutinization of the Marvel U. really took some energy out of me. If you thought reading Civil War was hard, try spending several Sundays in front of your computer, dissecting the whole damn thing through horrible jokes and lazy photoshop skills. Its not easy, let me tell YOU.

With that being said, there are a few things I want to say and/or apologize for:

My photoshop skills. They are weak, especially when I am cursed with only Photoshop Elements. No longer having to agonize over the ugly word balloons I created is a welcome relief. When I do something like this again, I'll have illustrator at my disposal, ready with the Pen tool.

The jokes. You take the good with the bad, even when there's a lot of bad. A good number of these jokes should have been put to rest long before they graced your computer screen, however I made a little promise not to censor myself so much for fear of stifling the good ones. Had I done so, we would probably be left with 3 strips which is not exactly prolific. So I padded the hell out of them!

I remember when I first pushed publish, I was a little scared. One, because I was worried how everyone would take my oddball sense of humor. Two, I figured somebody had already done a spoof on Get Your War On for Civil War. And three, that everyone was going to jump down my throat, calling me a big ol' homo-phobe because of how Cap and Tony's relationship/break up played out. As if I was coming out and saying "All gay relationships are abusive, manipulative and result in sexually transmitted diseases." Which I wasn't, despite what that one person in LiveJournal said. Civil War at its core seemed like this huge break up. Cap and Tony were the lovers who now found themselves on the outs with each other and were now fighting over personal possessions they had accumulated together. All those jokes about bogarting flagship characters and Veronica Mars DVDs were simply stolen from some of the uglier break ups I myself have dealt with. Cap getting beat up by Tony was just a way to play off the beating in issue 4 as well as highlight Tony's assholeness. And the Peter Parker giving Tony the clap really was just a funny joke that I stumbled upon quite accidentally. Had Marvel ever decided on making a female character worthy enough to lead a charge in something like this, the jokes would have been the same, except with a set of breasts attached. Unfortunately, Marvel has never been the kindest when it comes to women and affording them a place of status where the decisions that Tony and Cap were making throughout this whole ordeal would carry the same amount of weight, story wise.

Let's just say that everything is Joe Quesada's fault and be done with it.

Extra special thanks to Dorian over at Postmodern Barney. Had he not linked me in the beginning, this little gag fest would have probably gone largely unnoticed. If anything, you can blame him. Please read his blog on the daily basis as it is much, much better than mine.

All in all, the whole thing was a blast and I'm hoping to have some free time in the future to make some more web comics like this. Thank you to everyone that read, commented, entered the contest, and linked to the strips.

*cyber-hugs*

Get Your Civil War On - Link Round Up

2007-02-27T09:29:00.000-08:00

Get Your Civil War On - The Contest Winners!

2007-02-26T19:20:00.000-08:00

I want to thank everyone for submitting their results for the Get Your Civil War On contest. For those who are just tuning in, we had a little contest where readers submitted some of their GYCWO jokes to me with one person being chosen to have that joke created for all of you to see. The winner also gets lots of good stuff. Had some good entries, so I decided to give out 2nd and 3rd place prizes as well.

Without further adieu....

3rd Place Winner:

Carla from Snap Judgements and the 5th Color column at Blog @ NewsArama. I really liked the "internet forum debate" line alot. Calling Spider-man "emo" should be taboo, but it appears that's what Marvel wants from us fans. She wins a copy of Hench and the first Rising Stars trade. A comic by JMS? Is that even a prize? Thanks for entering, Carla!

2nd place winner:

2nd place goes to Sean Kleefield, who has a blog right here that needs to be read by everyone. Sean entered this piece, which cracked me up with the Danny Rand/Natasha Romanov joke. In true GYCWO fashion, he taps into all the sexy good times that come when heroes decided to team up and fight stuff. What do you win, Sean? American Born Chinese and the first two Animal Man trades!

And of course...

1st Place Winner:

Jon Hex came through with a few strips, these two being the best. Even in prison, Cap has no time for Speedball. And Tony Stark? Still a dick. Jon Hex put a nice little finishing touch on the end of all this GYCWO business that stayed true to the issue at hand: What happens next? Will Robbie Baldin ever get respect from Captain America in the yard? Will Tony and She-Hulk bicker with each other over the direction of the Post-GYCWO Marvel U? Regardless of what happens, Jon Hex will probably be just as upset about it as the rest of us are. For his contribution to GYCWO, Jon wins the first three Y: The Last Man TPBs, Sudden Gravity TPB, Shadow "Blood And Justice" TPB(by Howard Chaykin! Out Of Print!) and the Brian Posehn "Nerd Rage" CD. Congratulations, Jon!

Thank you to everyone for entering! As for the winners, you should be receiving an email shortly from me. Thank again!

The Last Day To Enter The GYCWO contest!

2007-02-23T13:47:00.000-08:00

That's right! Enter our contest and you might have the holy honor of making others cringe with your bad humor! It's that simple!

What do you do? Make up your own Get Your Civil War On strip!

What do you win? Lots of stuff!

Y: The Last Man "Unmanned" vol 1 TPB
Y: The Last Man "Cycles" vol 2 TPB
Y: The Last Man "One Small Step" vol 3 TPB
Sudden Gravity TPB
Brian Posehn "Nerd Rage" CD
Shadow "Blood And Justice" TPB(by Howard Chaykin! Out Of Print!)

I might even throw in an extra comic or so in there. I haven't decided yet. Click here for all the details.

The deadline is today with the winner being announced on Monday, February 26th. Good luck!

The Finale!!! Get Your Civil War On: The Decompression

2007-02-22T10:41:00.000-08:00

The Civil War is over! The arguing and bickering has come to an end! The Nation's greatest symbol of hope and freedom, Captain America, is in jail! What will he do now?!

He'll pick up that phone for one last call, in....

Get Your Civil War On: The Decompression!

(click to make bigger and read.)

Its a cheap joke and I know it, but there was no way we could have made it through without resorting to knocking the decompression that Bendis is so well known for.

With that being said, don't forget to enter the contest! We got stuff for you to win!

Email your entry to me at Spencercarnage@gmail.com! We'll have our winner posted on Monday! Thanks for reading!

Speaking of Furry Cat Thingies...

2007-02-21T08:39:00.000-08:00

I may or may not have roleplayed a session of Marvel Super Heroes RPG where my hockey-themed super hero character "Slasher" pimped himself some Tigra 'tang.

...

What?

I was like, 12, and all jacked up on Cola and Dorritos. You would have done the same.

Get Your Civil War On # 13

2007-02-21T08:30:00.000-08:00

(Marvel readers: High five yourselves! DC readers: Burn!)

NEXT: The final installment! Cap and Tony have it out one last time in........Civil War: The Decompression!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 12

The Of Course, Yeah Rampage!

2007-02-20T11:37:00.000-08:00

From Newsarama's preview of Civil War # 7:

I'm almost sad to see it end...

McNiven draws the best Sue Storm...EVER.

His furry cat-boobs aren't bad either..

Tony must die! Please, please, please..

Anyone think that Cloak is gonna bite it?? I know a lot of things point towards Cap, but they've also said repeatedly that they wouldnt kill off a Major character..
....but then again they already killed a black dude.. so maybe Cloak and Falcon are safe..

Two black dudes: Night Thrasher died in issue #1. If Millar kills three black character's in 7 issues I don't think Marvel would ever live it down.

Poor Night Thrasher and Goliath. Just more "black dudes" that died in order to add "weight" to a story. For some reason, I have a feeling the dead body at the end of all of this is going to be Falcon. From what I've seen of the solicitations, there is no mention of Falcon Post-Civil War. Its a shame really, because I have really grown to like him from his short stint in Brubaker's Captain America and Civil War.

Get Your Civil War On # 12

2007-02-20T08:24:00.000-08:00

(click, read, and then discuss my awesome genius and/or complete idiocy amongest yourselves)

Take that, femi-blogazis! Boys rule, girls drool! Check wikipedia if you don't believe me!

NEXT: MARVEL VS DC, Round Two!

PREVIOUS: House Of Forever Yesterday - a GYCWO tie-in

House Of Forever Yesterday - a GYCWO tie-in *

2007-02-19T19:27:00.000-08:00

(It doesn't really make that much sense to me either, but....)

NEXT: Cap and Tony remind us of the real Civil War...MARVEL VS. DC!!!!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 11

What are you waiting for? There's a contest! Enter!

2007-02-16T13:59:00.000-08:00

That's right. The Get Your Civil War On contest!

"What do I have to do?"

Make your own Get Your Civil War On strip! Its that simple!

"Well, what do I win?"

Y: The Last Man "Unmanned" vol 1 TPB
Y: The Last Man "Cycles" vol 2 TPB
Y: The Last Man "One Small Step" vol 3 TPB
Sudden Gravity TPB
Brian Posehn "Nerd Rage" CD
Shadow "Blood And Justice" TPB(by Howard Chaykin! Out Of Print!)

"That's awesome! What are the details?"

Good question! click here!

"I don't know. I don't know if I'm really all that funny."

Me neither! That doesn't stop me!

"Maybe it should. Have you even read the new ones that you made? Horrible. "

Screw you! Why don't you write one for me and win some free stuff?!

"Okay! "

Enter! (details here)

Get Your Civil War On # 11

2007-02-16T12:08:00.000-08:00

(click to make bigger, read, and then tell all your cyber-friends)

NEXT: Did that just really happen? Stay tuned for House Of Forever Yesterday!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 10

Get Your Civil War On # 10

2007-02-15T10:00:00.000-08:00

(Apologies in advance for the idiotic humor. Its getting a little heavy this go around.)

NEXT: The return of the Scarlet Witch! Its not what you expect! Seriously!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 9

Interesting Things Learned From Old Comics: Amazing Spider-man # 356 & 357

2007-02-14T16:50:00.000-08:00

Super heroes need love, too.

Especially after a tussle with the Secret Empire. Right guys?

That's right, Peter! Show all us fan boys how a nerd loves a red headed model! Yeah!

Put down your quest for vengeance and give in to the supple curves that are Marlene's hips and thighs.... The Fist Of Knonshu propels you...

No rest for you, Night Thrasher--!

You were created in the 90s--!

Your parents were killed by criminals--! The sweet piece of teleporting ass standing behind you can just wait until for her man to gets out all that rage--!

Night Thrash the pain away, Dwayne.... Night Thrash the pain away...

Words by Al Milgrom, art by Mark Bagley, Randy Emberlin, Joe Rosen, Bob Sharen, and Eric Fein.

Get Your Civil War On # 9

2007-02-14T08:00:00.000-08:00

(click, read, close... click, read, close.... click, read, close....)

NEXT: Matt Offers Peter Parker some sound advice on the subject of exposing one's secret identity.

PREVIOUS: The New Thunderbolts: Justice Through Nipple Clamps - a GYCWO Tie-in!

Blogging About Blogging Is Sexy

2007-02-13T14:03:00.000-08:00

After trying to keep my Blog firmly planted in the Bronze Age sensibility of blogging by refusing to fully embrace Web 2.0, Blogger Jim-Shootered my ass into getting with the program. Fortunately, Editorial Mandated Changes brings us Labels, special clicky arrows, and a photo uploading function that works way better than it did before. UN-fortunately, my feed is in complete disarray without any focus or direction that is causing the few readers to unintentionally drop the blog. If you're getting that [!] over at Bloglines, please resubscribe using this URL: http://ofcourseyeah.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default Thank you.

While we're at it, you might see an array of old posts popping up in flashbacks as they get retconned to reflect the new label system.

Hugs and Kisses,
Spencer D. Carnage

The New Thunderbolts - Justice Through Nipple Clamps - a GYCWO Tie-in!

2007-02-13T08:44:00.000-08:00

(Click to make big and read)

Next: Matt Murdock checks in on his boy Danny Rand!

Previous: Punisher War Blog - a GYCWO tie-in

Dont forget to enter the GYCWO Contest!

Annoucement!

2007-02-12T16:32:00.000-08:00

2 Guys Buying Comics is back!

Make sure to update your feed engines accordingly...

Get Your Civil War On: The Return... and a contest?

2007-02-12T11:31:00.000-08:00

First and foremost, I want thank you all for your patience these past few weeks in waiting for the next installment of Get Your Civil War On. The last image has been scanned. The jokes are done and are much more awful than they were last time. What's to come will probably be some of stupidest jokes you have read this side of a Twisted ToyFare Theatre. However, when held in comparison to what Marvel is currently putting out as CUTTING! EDGE! SUPERHERO! COMICS!, it will seem down right brilliant. What can you expect?

The New Thunderbolts: Justice Through Nipple Clamps!

Matt Murdock Drunk Dialing!

The Sorceror Supreme!

Black Captain America!

The Real Civil War! (The one we ALL should be fighting!)

and more!

In case you are not up to speed, please feel free to read what we have completed so far of Get Your Civil War On by clicking the following links.

Get Your Civil War On # 1
Get Your Civil War On # 2
Get Your Civil War On # 3
Get Your Civil War On # 4
Get Your Civil War On # 5
Get Your Civil War On # 6
Get Your Civil War On # 7
Get Your Civil War On # 8
Punisher War Blog - a GYCWO tie-in

and now..........a GYCWO Contest!!!

Who wants to win free stuff? To celebrate the next and final phase of Get Your Civil War On, we are going to have a contest! What's the contest? Make your own Get Your Civil War On 3 panel strip! Whoever makes the best will win stuff! Its that's easy! Just come up with a script for a 3 panel Get Your Civil War On strip and send them to me via at spencercarnage@gmail.com. I'll review them to see which one I think is the best and then make the strip for you which will showcased at the end of all of this! The current crop of characters are at your disposable:

Steve Rogers
Tony Stark
Matt Murdock
Natasha Romanov
Peter Parker
Mary Janes
Stephen Strange
Luke Cage
Robbie Baldwin
Punisher War Blog

Why those characters? Because those are the ones that I have images for! If you have a character that you want to use, Marvel OR DC, and you have the appropriate scan, please send it along with your script. As you can see, the format for all these(which I stole from Get Your War On) is basically a bunch of phone calls back and forth to each other where each character harps on this whole Civil War business. But don't let that limit you. If you feel the need to have Batman call in and give Tony Stark an earful, send the scan and script to me and I'll take it from there. Hell, if you want, make your own strip and submit it! Its okay if it looks a little bit amateurish! Lord knows mine do! So send them into me at spencercarnage@gmail.com!

"What?! Why would we do your job for you?! What's in it for us?!"

Excellent question, my friend! And the answer involves two words that I'm sure you will agree go very well together. Free comics! (And a Brian Posehn CD!) Which free comics? These ones!:

Y: The Last Man "Unmanned" vol 1 TPB
Y: The Last Man "Cycles" vol 2 TPB
Y: The Last Man "One Small Step" vol 3 TPB
Sudden Gravity TPB
Brian Posehn "Nerd Rage" CD
Shadow "Blood And Justice" TPB(by Howard Chaykin! Out Of Print!)

Some of these are decent comics that I didn't enjoy enough to keep as a permanent part of my collection. Some are really excellent and are being used to make this stupid contest something worthy of entering. Either way, they deserve a good home so why not give them away? Remember: due to the fact that all of these have been used before, they are probably in Good to Very Good condition. Sorry, but that's just how I read my comics. No, they are not damaged heavily, just maybe a severe wrinkle or two here and there. I am currently in the process of getting rid of some excess stuff so I figured what better way to to get rid than to have ourselves a little contest. We may have something for those runner up entries as well. Stay tuned!

The deadline will be Friday, February 23rd. The winner will be announced on Monday, February 26th. Good luck!

So you wanna blog about comics, eh?

2007-02-09T13:05:00.000-08:00

Now you know how to blog. Great. But what about being a real live comic book blogger? How does one go about doing that? Have no fear, friends. Spencer D. Carnage is here to instruct you in the way.

Walk tall and carry a polarizing stick
We all have our opinions. That's a known fact proven with science. What we all don't have are a lot of readers for our blogs. How can you fix that? By polarizing! Nothing beats a review of the newest issue of Amazing Spider-man like a polarizing opinion. To illustrated my point, I'm going to provide two reviews of an imaginary issue of Amazing Spider-man starring Solo, Cardiac, and a new made up villianess Relapse(who has the ability to control the biological processes in other people's bodies! TM!):

Non-polarizing opinion:

ASM # 632 is a pretty decent read. It gets a little wonky at the end when Solo shows up to help Spiderman fight off Cardiac and Relapse. Fills like it was rushed on the art and all that decompression about Peter Parker's new role as a PE coach left little time for some onscreen fighting. However, there is one issue left of the arc, so I figure I'm invested this much.....might as well pick it up and see how it ends. Eh.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Here's how you properly write that review.

Polarizing Opinion:

Dude! WTF?! Solo!? THAT ASSWIPE?!?! Fry all but one of my brain cells and I could still come up with better crap than that! You know what would have made this issue good? If Spider-man quit wasting time moping about life as Peter Parker and started delivering more double whammy webbed up punches to Cardiac's head and then ran the Spider-Mobile over Relapse just because she had the gall to wear Red, Green, and Purple in public! Give me an issue with Spider-man web-fisted-punching and Spider-Mobile hit-and-running and I will show you camera phone pics of me having sex with it. Are you listening, Marvel?! Can you handle the Spider-Mobile Hit-And-Run action that I'm throwing out here?! God, I hate comics so much sometimes, after reading a comic like this, its just I-...I-...I WANNA QUIT READING COMICS!!!!! YES!!!!! THAT'S IT!!!!! I'M DONE WITH COMICS!!!! IN YOUR FACE, MARVEL!!!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!

That's what I call a polarizing opinion. You read that and all you can say is "Oh hell yeah, brother. Spider-mobile Hit-And-Run? I'd buy THAT comic. From now on, your blog is the first blog I read every morning at work!" That or "Dude, this guy is all wack......I better keep reading. And leave a comment. Yeah!" Need I say more?

Pretty the place up
Buy a scanner and scan your whole collection. As fans of visual narrative, it is imperative that you post pictures from comics that you are blogging about. If we wanted to read text, we'd buy books! But we don't! We buy comics! So put some pictures next to those words! 'Nuff said!

When in doubt, whip it out
Your back issues, I mean! (Pervert.) If there one thing that comic book readers absolutely LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! its ollllllllld comics. And not just any old crop of comics. Specifically, Silver Age Comics. Golden Age comics work great, too. Nothing makes for a great post like some scanned panels from Sissy Lou Candy Fun # 253 and The Righteous Rifle Brigade Winter Special '72. Behind that wilted cover of Dr. Nuclear # 3 lies some of the most far out, grooviliscious, hackneyed pages involving Magenta Nega Rays, a Danish aerobics instructer named Irma, Saw wielding Fight-o Bots, Boddhisatva, and a suggestive drawing of bananas. And that's just the 2 page origin! Posting those panels will instantly garner you a stable crop of readers, just begging for more! Entire blogs are run on the commentary of the comics from days gone by alone. Not only can we revisit the good old days, but we can finally talk about that one thing that has been so elusive in the comics coming out today: Fun!

In your stupid face, Modern Comics!

Don't read Manga!
Why? Because Manga is not comics! Next!

Keep on top of the topical
In this day and age of hype upon hype upon hype, it makes sense that you stay in touch with what's going on in comic book news. Whether its about the newest crossover, creative change, or sexual harrassment at the con, it pays to be on the up and up. As much as us comic book readers love to read about these changes over at NewsArama and the Pulse, it excites us to no end to read what our favorite bloggers have to say about these developments. With emotions that range from utter disgust to sheer delight, your thoughts on the newest summer blockbuster comic with super star artist and writer attached is fodder for good blog posting. As guys like Joe Quesada and Erik Larsen start running weekly columns, you have a guaranteed source of blogging material for you to pick apart and talk about at length. Given some time and luck, someone else will blog about what you said, further the discussion even more and most importantly....getting you more hits! Isn't that what this is all about anyways?

Just Imagine Spencer Carnage.....
Here, we talk about the two Xs of comic book blogging. And we're not talking about the X-men and Lex Luthor, folks. No, We're talking about Remix and Context!

Sometimes just posting a panel isn't enough to convey how you feel about it. What you need to do is come up with your own witty Remix. Taking a few pages and throwing your own hilarious dialogue over it makes for a great read. One of the greatest ways to mock a current issue on the stands that you do not like is to reimagine the dialogue with jokes about how crappy that comic is. What was just a boring ol' page of Superman and Batman discussing the current dilemma that they face and how they're going to solve it now becomes a page where the two discuss how they secretly want to bang each other.

Which brings us to the our next X....Context! Even better than just remixing the word balloons to say how much Batman and Supes want to shag like wild dogs is taking those panels and using them out of context to show that they in fact DO love each other. Just post the picture and let it speak for itself(with additional snarky commentary, of course.) Once you hit that [POST] button, just sit back and watch the comments roll in...

Start and/or participate in a meme
Speaking of remix, what's Steve Rogers typing on his computer?

Is he updating his myspace profile? Trying to find love in the Casual Encounters section of the Houston, TX Craigs List site? Playing minesweeper? WHAT IS GOING ON!?!? I don't know. You tell me.

And that, my friends, is how a meme works.

Linking is your friend
According to Technorati, the number one source of information on the current state of blogging, the more you get linked, the more popular you are. But whose going to link to your new comic book blog if no one really knows you're there? How DO you get the word out?

Link to other bloggers.

Bloggers, by nature, are vain and dramatically self-obsessesed. And no blogger can resist the temptation to follow a link to their site from someone else's, if only to see what the hoopla's all about. If your blogging is banging, they just might leave a comment or two, congratulating you on a job well done for linking them. If you're lucky, you could find yourself on their own "blogroll", increasing your blog status by exactly one link. This back and forth between bloggers is what separates us from the rest of the folks who still maintain their crappy geocities homepages.

Google is your friend, too
And not because they can serve up to 22,600,000+ results for 'spiderman' in 0.0538 seconds. No. Google can tell you how people came to your site and what search terms they used to get there. Considering that 83.6821% of the users on the World Wide Web are perverts, most of these searches will be dirty in nature and not suitable for your mother. Some posts consists of nothing but asisine search terms that people used to find your blog. Examples such as, but not limited to:

Superman Gets Busy Radio Shack
Superman Hugs Bunny Love
Superman Necro Variant Cover Make Me Millions
Superman Depends On Batman Depends Underwear
Superman Sodomy Kryptonite
Superman Tasteful Nudes
Superman Chinese Mp3 Paris Hilton Video
Superman On Superman Mud Wrestling

By reading that list, you would never assume that those are all Google searches that lead to a post about Action Comics # 493! Just like that, unsuspecting pervs searching Google have found your blog. And by posting the funny results, you perpetuate the cycle for the next time that someone types "Superman Depends On Batman Depends Underwear." Its almost like these blogs blog themselves!

Find yourself a mascot
In the world of comics, there are a great many characters for us to find ourselves enamored to. Everyone love Spider-man, but what about Forbush man? Where's his love? Right on your blog, that's where. When the casual readers stops by and sees Forbush man, along with a couple panels talking about how bitching and kick ass he REALLY is, the cold, cold hearts inside your average comic book reader will defrost just a bit. Who knows? Maybe they love Forbush man, too. Lord knows that I do. Scipio made it work with Vibe. Brian Hughes is bringing the non-stop Modok love. And you don't have to use some Reject like D-Man or the Red Bee. BeaucoupKevin has the whole Kirby Catalogue pretty much. However, for maximum effectiveness, lovable losers are always a sure fire win.

I call dibs on Star Thief!

Adopt a Running Theme
Just like the mascot, themes are excellent. Whether its Guy Gardner week at Dave's Long Box or the non stop face kicking over at the Invincible Super Blog, themes help us to appreciate the zany things that you can only see in comic books. Wanna show some love for our distant cousins, the apes? Have a theme week. Hip to crossovers featuring Batman? Have a theme week. Think Wolverine is uber wack and you want to prove it to the world? Have a theme week. Like the aforementioned Invisible Super-Blog, you don't have to limit it to just one week. When ever you see a dude getting rock-a-shocked in the face by someone's boot or you feel like your mind is being blown, you know your in Chris Sim's house. Whose house?! SIM'S HOUSE!!

The most important thing to remember about having a Running Theme: Stick with it!

Nobody cares about your life
Unless of course comics are your life. Then we care. Even if comics are your life, there are other things that out there in which you probably have same kind of fanboyish(or girlish!) obsession for that you might want to post about occasionally. In all honesty, spare us! In the comic book blogo-a-hydron, we only want to read about comics. Its a proven fact that anytime you stray from the matter at hand(COMICS!), you lose us all. And losing us means you lose one of the only things that matter in comic book blogging: comments! Non-comic book related blog posts have been shown to reduce commenting by approximately 73 to 99.9%. Your comic blog readers will flock away in droves for other blogs that allow them to comment on the things that they love: comics!

That's all for today! Of course this doesn't cover everything, but its enough to guarantee at least 3-5 comments a month which should be enough to keep you going until you realize that blogging does absolutely nothing substantial for you in the Real World, resulting in quiting for other things like lurking, commenting, and message board posting. Until then, good luck!

Thank Goodness Its A New Joe Friday

2007-02-09T09:02:00.000-08:00

Sales are up! High fives for all you creators! Keep up the good work and keep producing material that will be equal to or (dare we say....) RIVAL Watchmen and Dark Knight Returns!

It is a good time for comics and damn on anyone who says otherwise! We are living in a comic book renaissance right now! Comics is gripping and totally like a mirror being held up to real life! Stan Lee would be so proud!

Hey, Newsarama! Thanks for being our biggest fanboy!

The kids are buying so we must be doing something right! If someone dies, its for a great, creative reasons and NOT to sell more books! Though we like to sell more books!

We brought back Captain Marvel because it made sense for the story! Speedball needs to undergo S & M treatment! If it services the character and tells an entertaining story, we'll do it!

Spider-man and MJ shouldn't be together! Why?! So we can tell more thrilling, engaging stories about Peter Parker showing up late for a date because he was too busy fighting the Dino Tamer Man From A Day Back When! Sense shattering!

The interfret thinks we're dumb, but why are our numbers so high!? Stupid interfret! Just sit back and wait! Here's a picture of Spider-man doing something vague that's related to the next big Spidey-crossover 3 years from now! Look! Intriguing........!

Want more spoilers!? Can't tell you, but maybe you should buy more Marvel comics, ya think!?

See ya next week!

Interesting Observations Made From Old Comics: Captain America Annual # 8 pt. 3

2007-02-09T07:10:00.000-08:00

Nuclear Bombs freak little kids out!

Words by Mark Gruenwald with art by Mike Zeck and John Beatty

Interesting Observations Made From Old Comics: Captain America Annual # 8 pt. 2

2007-02-06T10:27:00.000-08:00

Even a total bad @ZZ!!! like Wolverine has feelings.

Words by Mark Gruenwald with art by Mike Zeck and John Beatty

Interesting Observations Made From Old Comics: Captain America Annual # 8

2007-02-05T11:27:00.000-08:00

The Avengers used to have standards.

Words by Mark Gruenwald with art by Mike Zeck and John Beatty

Listen up, DC Comics!

2007-02-02T13:37:00.000-08:00

How To Get Me To Borrow A Copy Of Supergirl

Make it non-continuity and throw Darwyn Cooke on it. Charming and cute, Supergirl would be that girl next door with a mischievous smile and a secret. Readers should have a crush on Supergirl, giving anything to be her romantic interest or best friend. Drenched in nostalgia and classic Silver Age goodness, a Darwyn Cooke Supergirl would be light, entertaining and fun. It would be a welcome respite from the "mature" stories of the current DCU. Of course Darwyn Cooke is not the only DC writer out there that could do the character right, but if you could find a better person for the job, please say so.

How To Get Lots Of Fan Boys To Buy Supergirl

Sales on Supergirl would probably skyrocket if they fully embraced the cheesecake potential that superhero comics are all about. Even though the Supergirl book is currently in the realm of cheesecake, it suffers from the lack of a good artist. Churchill always seems to be 5 steps behind the Image founders, such as Jim Lee and Rob Liefeld. Although there are a barrage of notable bloggers that would be even more upset at the Supergirl book than they are now, sales would be decent and all hope lost. Increase her bust size and get an artist that knows how to draw an attractive woman. It wouldn't suit my personal tastes, of course, but its safe to say that there is a very healthy percentage of fanboys out there would favor that kind of creative change. Just look to the fan art on the web to get an idea of what some fan boys want from a Supergirl comic. Sexy, Seductive, and Stacked.

How To Get Me to Love Supergirl

Of the few Supergirl incarnations I have read, Alan Moore's Suprema was the best. A Silver Age character displaced from the Supremeverse of 50s and brought into our modern world, she was loud mouthed, opinionated and intolerant of all the grim and gritty heroes of the 90s. Her appearance in the issues of Supreme and Youngblood always stole the show. Like your morally superior and somewhat overbearing sister, is was her duty to remark on her contemporaries' methods of heroism and their complete lack of proper decorum while swooping in to save their asses.

The Supergirl that fans are faced with now is one that does not understand her place. Writers are relying upon third rate teenage melodrama as a means of showing her going through the paces of maturing into the hero that she should be. When Supergirl first appeared, it was at a time when being a hero was something that just came naturally with no questions asked. Putting a Silver Age character like Supergirl through the Marvel Comics Merry-Go-Round of Faux Realism defeats the point of the character. Smoking, drinking, and making out with an alternate reality version of your cousin will never make for an engaging Supergirl comic. Happily punching bad guys while chewing out Batman for being such a stick in the mud? Not in this life time.

Just cuz'

2007-01-31T14:46:00.000-08:00

The Iron Man-Tony Stark doodle/sketch blog has been updated! Only one week late on catching this! Yay!

Go read about some mini-comics that you and I should both be reading! Someone wanna give me a copy of Class Of 2006: Real Quotes From Real Students from Jury Rigged Comics as either a belated Christmas Present or Early Birthday? Just pick a reason, I'm cool with either or.

The one artist that I currently wish I could emulate right now is Nick Derington. Next month, it will probably be Hugo Pratt. Or Sal Buscema. Ima little slutty like that.

Go to Cartoon Brew, watch this video of Uly Meyer drawing, than just kind of hang out and see what else is going.

So, Dave Sim is like this weird guy who has written all kinds of messed up things that I will probably never get around to reading, but Dave Sim reading magazines like the TCJ and Comic Book Artist and then writing about it....I read and liked. Dead on about The Comics Journal, that Canadian mysognist is.

Podcasts! Do you like? Me, too. iFanboy.com and Ink Studs. One is for the "Jon Hex" inside of you and the other is for your inner-Spurge.

This is where I get off

2007-01-31T13:27:00.000-08:00

"Ha! In your face, stupid New Avengers fan! You thought it was Iron Fisting Agent Of Shield Daredeviling Man, but you were wrong! It was a whiny emo ninja chick that's deaf! Can you say plot twist?! Cause that's just what happened!"

Sorry. I just read that preview right now and found myself a little dumbfounded over Brian Michael Bendis's need to drag his messageboard ranting into the pages of the New Avengers. Carry on.

A little something that makes you both happy and sad at the same time...

2007-01-29T11:02:00.000-08:00

Happy! :)

Finding a random copy of Hiroaki Samura's Blade Of The Immortal: Food one shot on the bookshelf in my living room.

Sad... :(

The same issue of Blade Of The Immortal was damaged to all holy Hell. Haven't you roommates ever heard of a bag and board?

Getting your roommates to read comics. What an interesting task. Not that I feel the need to force comics on other people, its just that I enjoy them so much that I only wish to share them with the world at large. So far, the only luck I have had in that department at the current house I am living at is with Roadstrips, a travel anthology comic. Jim, the resident beer drinking, dirt bike riding, half coyote-dog owning housemate read a little bit of it on the can and commented on how he enjoyed it. Other than that, graphical novellas get no love.

Is your house like this? Do the ones in your house that leave copious amounts of dirty dishes and drink your alcohol without asking also spurn comics?

Ahh. If the way you treat Blade Of The Immortal is any indication of your disrespect towards the artform, I don't WANT you reading my comics anyway!

Diamond 1, Boob War 0

2007-01-19T14:15:00.000-08:00

Did I ever tell you that someone made a comic book using my roommate as a template for the main character? Its called Nightmare Girl and you can check it out right here at NightmareGirl.com. Its Boob War through and through.

Last night, she asked my friend Ryan and I if we knew what Diamond was. We explained to her that Diamond was pretty much the one and only distribution company that supplied everything comic related to comic shops all over the nation. Intrigued by her question, we asked here why she was in interested in Diamond.

"They won't carry Nightmare Girl because they said that both the writing and art aren't good enough."

Huh. Although Nightmare Girl is not necessarily my cup of tea per se, there is definitely a niche market out there for books like it. Just take a look at the likes of Lady Death, Vampirella, and Tarot comics. What's to keep Diamond from adding Nightmare Girl to the ranks of such esteemed alumni? Are we left to assume that where Nightmare Girl artist Duvall Stowers fails, the work of Jim Balent meets the Gold Standard of cheesecake comics that Diamond has set in place? Is it even fair to maintain some kind of standard for a small branch of the comic book medium that by the very nature of its subject matter disregards things like "good taste" and "decency"? Now, I am not condemning books like Lady Death or Nightmare Girl for being tasteless. To do so, would certainly miss the point. Its safe to say that a book like Nightmare Girl is catering to a specific audience that openly embraces the cheesecake nature of the art. Interestingly enough, the comic book exploits of a female character like Ms. Marvel can be equally full of gratuity and vapid storytelling as some of the aforementioned books. The main difference being that a book like Ms. Marvel has Marvel Comics on its side. With that, comes some kind of respect that dignifies the purchase of Ms. Marvel over Lady Death. Don't ask me how, but for some strange reason it just does. As for Nightmare Girl? If there was a time machine available, I would instruct my roommate to jump in it and turn that dial back until it reads 1994.

When I look at a book like Lady Death on the shelf, I can not help but think that its merely just a hold over from an era where variant covers depicting male super heroes have been transformed into buxom females by Rob Liefeld sold well. A move like that today on a super hero comic SHOULD get you laughed off of the racks. (Fear not, readers. If anything, we still have the female version of male heroes to satisfy that need.) Despite the fact that the 90s are for the most part over, there are people out there that still continue to buy Lady Death and Tarot. As long as there is the threat of an ample bosom ready to burst open the bikini that fights to hold them in, there are fans that threaten to compromise ad space in Previews when they open and read a Jim Balent book. And there is a large contingent of people out there that are more than happy to hear the news of Diamond's decision towards a book like Nightmare Girl as well.

Over the past few months, I have witnessed my roommate's reaction when she first saw some of the art for the first time, having posters printed up, and eventually holding the finished product in her hands. It was exciting to see her tell everyone about the comic that she was going to be starring in. The adolescent power fantasy that most comic book fans wish for was a real for her and sitting right there on our coffee table. Its safe to say that the breast enlargement the creators gave her was something that she could do without. (Especially since I have recently overheard her arguing with another friend against women getting breast implants.) She probably assumed the increased bust line was an attribute that all female heroines had to possess in order to survive on the racks, much like the muscles their male counterparts needed to defeat a super-villian. Unfortunately, it appears as if that same bra size could have very well been one of the reasons for the book's defeat at the hands of Diamond.

I helped put into perspective for my roommate the uphill battle that Nightmare Girl is going to be facing. Off of the top of my head, I threw out the name of Cold Cut with the advisory that I was unfamiliar with what kind of titles they distribute, thinking they might have a chance there. Taking into consideration the traits that Nightmare Girl exudes, there really was only one piece of semi-worthy advice I could give her:

"Wear something skimpy and hit those convention floors. From what I hear, they are absolutely CRAWLING with potential fans for this kind of stuff."

In the face of Diamond's decision, that might be this book's only chance.

Punisher War Blog - a GYCWO tie-in!

2007-01-18T09:28:00.000-08:00

(click the pic and read)

NEXT: The Death Of Speedball!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 8

Let's take five..

2007-01-17T13:59:00.000-08:00

Egads. If you thought reading Civil War was bad, trying pouring over the comics just so you could write some really bad jokes over photoshopped images of Captain America and Tony Stark. Do we really have to wait until February 21st for this thing to end? Thank god for The Immortal Iron Fist. If you are not reading that book than we are not cyber-friends.

Real quick aside from all this Civil War nonsense:

James Sime over at The Isotope Lounge has announced the Fifth Annual Isotope Award for Excellence in Mini-Comics are accepting submissions up until midnight, March 15th. Look towards 2008 for Spencer D. Carnage to come in and win this shit. I would gladly enter into this year's contest, however I don't think I have enough time to complete the totally radical comic that I just plotted out. Its going to be a hugely insane battle between the forces of comic books and computers, with a cameo from the eBay website. If you look down now you will notice that you are sitting on the edge of your seat.

Mr. Paul Pope blogs about the monstrous task that Chris Pitzer and himself are currently undergoing to get Pulphope out. Having just read the Pulphope ashcan, I am extremely excited to be reading this. I have not had the chance to pick up the new FF anniversay issue that he contributed to. That just came out last week, right? While the minutes whittle away towards Pulphope's release, kill a few of them reading an 8 page Batman story Pope did some time ago in Gotham Knights # 3.

And Babel and The Wire are tre stupendous. If you have seen neither, please do. Pan's Labrynth is good, too, but not so much like the others. And 24 is looking like its turned into 90's X-men. Color me non-surprised when a future version of Jack Bauer shows up as the mastermind of every bad thing that's happened in the 24-verse since its inception.

Get Your Civil War On # 8

2007-01-17T13:21:00.000-08:00

(click to read in all its two color glory)

NEXT: The Punisher War Journal 2.0!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 7

Get Your Civil War On - Delayed!

2007-01-15T19:24:00.000-08:00

We appreciate everyone's response to Get Your Civil War On over the past few days. We are almost at the finishing line and we just can not wait until we show you all how these things pan out. And let me tell you: you have never SEEN anything like this. Once this is done, the Of Course, Yeah! Marvel U will changed. For-ever. Unfortunately, we are running into some delays with our artist. He strained his hand playing Zelda on his new Nintendo Wii which has forced us to push the release date back. Unfortunately this delay doesn't just affect Get Your Civil War On. The release dates of Punisher War Blog, The New Thunderbolts: Justice Through Nippleclamps, and Civil War: Hack and Slash have been pushed back as well.

We thought about bringing in fill in artists, however we do not want to damage the artistic vision of the story, especially one that is as important as this. Just imagine if they replaced the artist on Penny Arcade, PVP and Dinosaur Comics? At one point or another these webcomics suffered a hiatus due to unforseen complications, forcing their creators to delay publication. If the Penny Arcade had to resort to using Alien Loves Predator for fill in, its safe to say that the overall quality of the webcomic would have suffered. We're looking at the long term picture here and we ask that you all be patient. Get Your Civil War On has been an amazing story for us here at Of Course, Yeah! and know that when the next issue comes out, you will absolutely forget the fact that you waited several days to read it.

With that being said, we are proud to announce two new series spinning out from the events of Get Your Civil War On. The first one we would like to announce is House Of Forever Yesterday! We don't want to go into too many details, but we do want to say this: The Scarlet Witch is back. And so is Mark Bagley. If there were two things that we here at Of Course, Yeah! were looking forwarded to the most its Wanda and Mark. We're anticipating that House Of Forever Yesterday will be a huge hit amongest the fans. If not for the delays on Get Your Civil War On, the House Of Forever Yesterday would not have been possible. The second new title to spin out of Get Your Civil War On that we would like to announce is.....Get Your Secret Wars On! Taking you back to the days of the Beyonder, Tony and Steve discuss all the huge changes that happened in the legendary Secret Wars I & II....over the phone! Its going to be great. The fans have been clamoring for the return of Beyonder for awhile and we here at Of Course, Yeah! have replied by doing just that.

Its an exciting time here at the Blog Of Idiocy! Stay tuned and you will not be disappointed! Excelsior!

Get Your Civil War On # 7

2007-01-11T08:26:00.000-08:00

(click to make big.)

NEXT: Will Tony be able to cope with the fact that his new boy toy Peter Parker has defected to the Anti-Registration side? And how does Clor figure into Tony's plan to cope with this loss? Until next time......Excelsior!

PREVIOUS: Get Your Civil War On # 6