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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Marvel Solicitations for March

Well, since I'm here and Newsrama has the solicitations up for Marvel Comics that are coming out in March, I figured....what the fuck, huh? Let's take a look at a few that caught my eye for one reason or another..

Now what the hell is up with Hulk's hand around Iron Man's neck? I am a horrible artist and I can totally draw the Hulk choking Iron Man with more talent that Mr. Nord is showing here. Seriously, what the shit are we looking at?

That guy on the right is the Ultimate version of Stryfe, right? I bet you take off his mask and he looks all fuggin' bad azz like this:

Kirkman is the one writing this comic, right? So I'm not all that far off.

March is a bad month for Spider-man covers. And that's fucking Phil Jiminez and Tony Harris that you're looking at, being all shitty and what not.

This cover makes me want to go back and play some Rifts. You know, dust off my old Tattooed True Atlantean Glitter Boy pilot and take on some Coalition SAMAS in the radioactive ruins of Old Minnesota with nothing but a Juicer Merc and D-Bee Ley Line Walker backing my shit up. If roleplaying games have their say, the future is gonna be awesome. Know what I'm sayin'!?

So Captain Marvel is back and apparently Wolverine or D-Man are making an appearance in the last issue of a mini-series that I MIGHT try to convince a friend to buy so I can borrow it 12 months after the fact. Or should I just skip it altogether? Its hard to decide when it comes to CAPTAIN MARVEL.

Hitch sucks now. Proof? Ultimates Volume Two. This picture is probably the best I have seen of his FF work, but the rest of it is just one big ugly mess of realistic super hero crap.

Bagley, you traitorous son of a bitch! Not even an New Warriors cover before you leave? 'Tis heresy!

Anyone following this? Read the first issue and decided to wait for the trade. Is it good? Bad? Does it help you lure indie comic reading hipster girls into bed?

Have they revealed who Night Thrasher is yet? If so, please spoil it for me. Or at least spoil what the message boards are guessing who it is. Cuz in this picture, its looking like some jack ass of a honky and NOT my man, Dwayne Taylor.

Dude. Know why you're all sad, Nova? Because you're dicking around in space when you really should be back on Earth, banging a hot ass Atlantean babe named Namorita and giving Speedball noogies. But nooooooooooo..... someone had to go into space while the rest of the Warriors were playing grab ass with explosive villians in Connecticut, causing people like me to turn my back on comics forever(12-18 months tops!)...

Thanks a lot, Rich Ryder!

And that's all I got for right now. There are a bunch of other covers with X-men standing around all bad ass and She-Hulk punching stuff while her big ol' boobs make your mouth salivate. The usual.


Chad Nevett said...

I'm digging on Omega the Unknown. It's weird and off-beat...but in the good sense of each word. I've yet to use it to lure indie comic reading hipster girls into bed, but that's only because I don't know any indie comic reading hipster girls...and I don't think this comic could do that. It's only a comic, not booze. But imagine a comic with the power of booze...and not just regular booze, but SHOTS! That's a world I want to live in, I tell ya.

Chad Nevett said...

And a second comment because I forgot to check the "subscribe to any future comments" thing. I'm lazy and spoiled by it and can no longer blog without having comments e-mailed to me. Fuck checking to see if someone's said something, I live in the future now and I am tired of wasting precious seconds--seconds that COULD be spent trying to invent a comic that acts like shots of booze on indie comic reading hipster girls. Damn right.

Spencer Carnage said...

You're blowing my mind right now, Chad. I mean.....WOW.

Ryan said...

I've actually been wary of Omega up until the last issue. It is a very strange book, but it's one of those books you can't really stop reading, no matter how weird it is.

Jason said...

I just can't bring myself to pick up the single issues of Omega, knowing that I'll buy the hardcover the day it drops. I've avoided even paging through it at the shop knowing I'll drop the cash on it right there. Then again, I've so far droped $12 on three issues of Countdown: Arena, so this just proves I'm a sucker.

Anyway, a little more cross-hatching on that sketch of Stryfe and you may just get the opportunity to pencil the next Brigade re-launch.

Spencer Carnage said...


That KIND OF sounds like a recommendation. Still not sold, but I'll probably waste my money on it anyways.


Countdown: Arena? Seriously? I feel like so much has happened since we've last commented with each other. Are you rooting for Gotham By Gaslight: Batman or Batman:Beyond Batman?

(Nerd! J/K! Maybe!)

Jason said...

Honestly, it's like battered-wife syndrome with Arena, it keeps crapping on me, yet it keeps calling to me from the shelf. Maybe Ike Turner's soul wandered into it when he bought it.

By the way, totally rooting for Liberty Files Batman.

Chad Nevett said...

See, I can understand buying that book. Theoretically, a comic about alternate reality versions of heroes beating the shit out of one another sounds awesome. Alternate reality anything sounds awesome. Sadly, they keep weighing this awesome shit down with PLOTS. What the fuck? Who needs a goddamn plot when it's 17 different versions of Superman just beating on one another? Plots just get in the way. Same with characterisation. Seriously. Exiles would be fifty times better if they just forgot about having characters and just let writers do whatever, because who gives a shit, it doesn't matter. The only time alternate reality stuff should have plots and recurring characters is when it takes place within the context of another story. If it's just alternate realities standing on their own? Fuck that shit, just have some fun and show me some cool stuff. If I want characters and plots, I'll read comics that actually matter.

Ryan said...

Spence, I really would recommend the comic, but I can see how the writing style might be a turn off to some people. It is really awkwardly written, but it really is a good book. If you're familiar with the original series at all, it's worth picking up for the nostalgia factor alone. The art is really appealing in a silver-agey kind of way, too.

Ryan said...

**SPOILER ALERT** Hey Spence, Night Thrasher is now Donyell Turner.

pachoob said...

omega's rad. get it in issues and the collection. buy it in as many forms as you can. make underwear out of it. brush your teeth with it.

i mean, it's not THAT good, but i'm drunk so these things are funny to me.

oh, and buy that "one more day" storyline and then throw up a lot. i just downloaded the last issue and i'm like, really? the devil wanted to break up their marriage, huh? memo to joe q: that's fucking dumb.

Jason said...

See, the devil knew how many fanboys he would cause to despair because of the break-up, so actually, it's a pretty brilliant plan. Assuming of course that Joe Q IS the devil.

Hopefully, someone can spin gold outta shit with this Spider-Mess, like Bru did with Cap.

Dude, just read the Yiddish Policeman's Union by Chabon, get that and read it while you wait for Omega to hit trade.

Spencer Carnage said...


Donyell Turner? It would have been so much cooler if it was midnight's fire. But whatever. Has the comic gotten any better or is it still a snooze fest? I MIGHT get the trade.

And you all have made me pretty much dedicate myself to buying the trade. Its got Lethem and Darymple, so there's no way in hell I would pass that up. I just hope its better than some of the things I've been reading. Lately, its like comics want me to hate them. More on that later.

And the great thing about OMD is that I didn't have to read it. I would definitely pick up BND if I was reading comics on a regular basis but I'm not so I'll just have to trust the internet to let me know how its going.


I just finished the Yiddish Policeman's Union a few months ago. Great fucking book. I want to get Chabon's new one but money's tight right now. But yeah, that's a great book that all of you should be reading.

pachoob said...

trusting the internet is a dangerous thing to do, spencer. she's a mistress one shouldn't turn one's back on.

Jason said...

Hey man, just read Gentlemen of the Road (Chabon's new one) and it was OK, but certainly not worth the $22 it would cost you retail. It's a lot like the format of Ellis's book, small HC, big print, tight margins and it's only 200 pages. It's a fun, quick read, but I'd wait for paperback or get it from the library (where I got it).

My only problem with the book is that he has a long afterword essentially apologizing for writing another pulp novel instead of another novel like Wonderboys and New Yorker articles. No shit writing about "Jews with Swords" (the original title for the book) is more fun than another book about depressed divorced people. Write what you want and don't apologize for it. That said, I did love Wonderboys.

Dart Adams said...

I had to comment on this post because:

a) You mentioned Rifts...I used to play that way back in the 90's and I realized I wasn't the only one that say the Annihilation cover and immediately didn't think of Glitter Boy armor and the Coalition.

b) You put up the new New Warriors (which was my favorite comic of the early 90's with X-Force being a close 2nd). I started reading the new New Warriors title and I bet my brother that Night Thrasher was, in fact, Donyell, I was right.

Nice drop.


Spencer Carnage said...


Oh thank god someone appreciated that Rifts reference. If I could, I would totally get a campaign going, but I can't, so I won't. Yes, I'm that kind of nerd. Deal with it.

And I never knew Donyell was all about when it came to the New Warriors, other than he was a villian. I stopped after issue 30. Why? Because they put Darick Robertson on art and took Night Thrasher off of the team. Then there was that Infinity War cross over with Blackball and that point, it was team to move on to Youngblood Strikefiles and Vanguard. I did in the latest issue that Midnight's Fire is back. Or at least, I think it was him. I just browsed and didn't see the classic scar on his face. Maybe he got surgery? I don't know. Either way, I'm not too sure if I'm excited for this incarnation of New Warriors.

Ryan said...


It's got jubilee, how great can it be?

On a side note, ZOMGZ special post for you at my blog!

click here for spencer's very own special post