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Monday, June 04, 2007

Live Antholobloggin!

Today, for the first time....EV-ER! I, Spencer D. Carnage will be bringing YOU, the fearless reader(s), Live Antholoblogging. For those that are curious as to what exactly Live Antholoblogging is, please consort with the Live Antholoblogging FAQ:

Q: What is Live Antholoblogging?
A: Live Antholoblogging is where I read a comic book anthology and blog to you, LIVE, about the whole thing. Its kind of like blogging the Oscars but not as boring or "Been there, done that, yawn"-ish. In other words, its groundbreakingly awesome.
Work's slow so I thought I'd treat you guy(s). Today we are going to Live Antholoblog New Reliable Press's you ain't no dancer vol. 2 which was released towards the end of the last year that I picked up two months ago at APE. Let's dive in, shall we?

11:10 AM 6/4/2007
Let's take a look at the cover. That's Jeffrey Brown throwing down a picture of a kid getting pinned to ground. Oh nos!, that beetle's gonna get yo 'shit! Eh, I'm not a big fan of Mr. Brown's work, but I like the concept that he's got going on here.

11:11 AM 6/4/2007
"A Recipe For Youth" by Hope Larson. 2 pages of nice things that you should touch in order to stay young. It starts out with a purring cat which is thumbs up in my book! I could make some joke about how a woman's hoo hoo is not on the list, but I won't.

11:13 AM 6/4/2007
"Puzzles" by Meg Hunt. Another little story about the nostalgia of our youth as incited by doing puzzles when you are older. See? Even indie artists nerds are all about nostalgic. I bet you Meg's all "The crosswords in Garfield's Crossword Extraganza from 1985 were so much better than the ones they got in those wack ass Spongebob puzzle books..." Right?

11:15 AM 6/4/2007
"Enormous" by Patrick Murphy. Okay. Some big ass ol monster comes up to a some kid's house, which prompts this small child to climb up the monster's back and fall asleep. While sleeping, guess what the monster does? EATS HIS HOUSE. Got a nice chuckle out of me, so it's all good in the hood, G. Yeah.

11:17 AM 6/4/2007
"Weatherlad" by Weatherwise.
Finally! Some of those stupid super heroes that I hate/love/hate so much! Wait a second...this isn't a super hero story. Its about a nerd that likes super heroes being forced to ask girl out! Now that's Science Fiction if I ever saw it. Nicely done, Mr. Weatherwise, even if there's no one getting punched out or being forced to Register or else!....

11:20 AM 6/4/2007
"Those Were The Days"
Mitch Clem is funny. One page, six panels, all about the agony of being a teenager. I think Mitch has voyeuristic access to my youth as an awkward hessian turned punk rock adolescent, sans the hilarious alcoholic father.

11:22 AM 6/4/2007
Ugh... duty calls! BRB!

11:24 AM 6/4/2007
Ok, I'm back. Where was I? Oh yeah, Mitch Clem. Good stuff! Next!

11:24 AM 6/4/2007
"Chimney Preference" by Jeffrey Brown.
Umm. I don't really like Jeffrey Brown. Everything I've read is just super whiny emo crappity crap comics. He can't really draw and his life does not seem interesting enough for me to want to read about it. That what he does, auto-bio comics right? Yeah, not fan. This two pager just recounts some childhood thing he did, which is miles better than the young adult to adult things he does, but so what? First crappy strip of the book. Let's hope that's all we gotta deal with.

11:27 AM 6/4/2007
"Michael Redhead" by Jordyn Bochon.
Let me tell you something. I am a redhead. More of a reddish-brown head, but still pretty much a red head. As a red head I have a confession to make: I don't really like other redheads. It like showing up at prom and someone else is wearing the exact same dress. Now there are exceptions, but for the most part, if you got red hair, I don't want anything to do with you. In this strip, we briefly analyze the down-trodden childhood life of Michael Redhead and then state that we don't know what happened to him after some presumed escape from our lives in highschool. Who cares? He's a stupid ass ginger that's probably trading tricks for rocks. Good riddance to bad rubbish! The art in this one is really good though. Thank god it was in black & white. Don't wanna flare up like a bull looking at Michael Redhead's flame orange hair. God!

11:31 AM 6/4/2007
"Indian Princess" by Colleen MacIssac.
One page strip about two friends that want to dress up as indian princesses. Of course, the honky girl shows up as a native american. (The other girl was actually Indian.) Stupid white people! They're # 2 on the list of people I hate, right below mother fuggin' redheads!

11:33 AM 6/4/2007
More work stuff. Hold up.

11:36 AM 6/4/2007
Alright. Next we have "When I grew up" by Liz Prince. This falls in line with that same Jeffrey Brown rant, artistically speaking. The punch line isn't as bad, but I'm not running out to buy any of her work anytime soon.

11:37 AM 6/4/2007
"Overcompensating Babies: 1988-Lunch Special" by Jeffrey Rowland.
Its a bunch of white kids running around, talking ebonics and going on about lunches and Yo! Mtv Raps. The improper use of Street Knowledge can be a bit cliche, but it works here. So far the longest story at 7 pages.

11:40 AM 6/4/2007
"Of Course, Of Course, Of Course" by K Thor. Jensen.
Oh, see that's what I like. Some indie artist talking about how when he or she was a kid, that they hoped they would get super powers and now they tell us in their artsy fartsy way how they went about doing it. Haven't read any of K. Thor Jensen's work, but now I'm inclined to do so. Funny stuff he's got going on in here.

11:43 AM 6/4/2007
"The Eve of" by Blaise Laramee.
An interesting little look into the world of teenagers after high school going back and doing the stuff they used to do IN highschool. You see the overall theme this anthology's got going on? Its drawn well and doesn't upset me like redheads or Jeffrey Brown so I give it 2 thumbs up. At the end, there's a fade out right after the two girlfriends approach each other, with words "Oh, Yvonne." captioning the fade to black. This take place in a cemetary. Am I an a-hole for assuming this was their first lesbian kiss with each other? Or is Blaise Laramee an a-hole for not showing us the goods? Please don't skimp on the girl-on-girl make out sessions next time, thank-YOU!

11:47 AM 6/4/2007
"Litter" by Grant Reynods.
Woah. Show us some cute puppies being taken care by they momma only to show the owner do away with the whole pack. Its beautifully illustrated but harsh. Why you gotta make me all sad?

11:48 AM 6/4/2007
"The Third Cat" by Lilli Carre.
Ok, a cat comic. Not so sad anymore. Hold up. Did that guy just break that cat's back just because Mr. Whiskers got a little scratch friendly? Indie comics just want to bum you out and make you feel as miserable as the people doing so. Thanks alot, you underpaid miserable cartoonist!

11:50 AM 6/4/2007
"With Pig Eyes" by Jason Turner.
Jason Turner did my Lockjaw & Lockheed sketch, so he's cool even if the story is a little bongo. We get to take yet another trip into someone's past, except this guy seems crazy and wears a pig's head on his head. I like his brush work even if its a little rough.

11:52 AM 6/4/2007
"Sharp Young Minds" by Phil McAndrew.
Another fine little 4 page strip. Its got charm and wit, and was drawn like hell. Reminds me a little bit of the art from Where The Wild Things Are. I like it.

11:54 AM 6/4/2007
"Gunplay" by Jeff Bent.
An imaginary tale of kids playing "war" that's pretty funny. Playing "war" as a kid was the best. Except for when Kevin played. Kevin was the neighborhood nerd that was always getting whooped by whatever powers and/or weapons I devised for myself that day. Right as you were about to lay the smack down, he'd cross his arms across his chest and yell "teleport!" all whinyish. That used to PISS us off. Or he would always come up behind you and "paralyze" you with his "paralyzing touch." Paralyze? Teleport? Please! You wanna play war, you gotta play WAR! There's no teleporting or paralyzing in Energized Bo Staff to Energized Bo Staff combat! Did I tell you that Kevin was also from Missouri that wore Coke bottle glasses? Yeah, he was pretty lame.

11:57 AM 6/4/2007
"Fanboy Meets The Wooly Bear" by Dalton Webb.
Fangboy vs. Wooly Bear over the last fig. Fangboy wins. And that's about all I can say for this one. Next!

11:58 AM 6/4/2007
"Sled" by Jon Sukarangsan.
Kids go sledding and run into the Goddess of Fate who inquires into the death defying nature of children. Its fairy tale-ish. And stuff. Drawn very well, too.

12:00 PM 6/4/2007
"Books Before Bed" by Graham Kahler.
Another pleasant little romp into the fantasy land of children. I think.....? Decent, but whatever.

12:04 PM 6/4/2007
"A Fifth Hole Adventure" by Fred Grisolm and Jamie DeeGaleey.
This one's good. Two guys get attached to each other by two umbilical cords which eventually shatters all of reality. A nice little commentary on gay marriage in showing how stupid people are when they talk as of allowing gay marriage to take place will ruin life as we know it. Why you gotta be all oppressive and shit, dang ol' homophobic straight people?

12:07 PM 6/4/2007
"Untitled" by Dalton Sharp.
Another good little strip. Just a bunch of panoramic glimpses into the various different generations of young adults, starting in the 40s that ends with a post-apocalyptic future. Sometimes I wish that society would just get over itself and just destroy itself. Then I could outfit my Civic with steel plates and gun turrets and call it the UnCivic. Don't be trying to steal gas from me unless you want a crossbow to the skull!

12:12 PM 6/4/2007
"Up Til Now" by Neil Babra.
And we finish off with a wordless montage of life, love, and heartbreak. Neil Barba sure can draw. It gets a little weird and metaphysical half way through, but then again, what is love without a little bit of metaphysical squid tentacles coming at you to illustrate your broken heart? Its stupid, that's what it is.

And that's it. Our first foray into Live Anthoblogging! I feel kind of exhausted and tired after all that. Maybe this wasn't the best anthology to try this little experiment out with because of the shortness of all the stories. Then again, most anthologies are like that. Short and sometimes sweet.

Damn. How the hell could a person do this for the god awful Oscars or American Idol is beyond me.


Jason said...

Hmmmmm....good stuff. I' haven't picked up an indie anthology in a dog's age (do they still do the Expo anthologies, always liked those). Your work has not been in vain though, it helped me waste a good 30 mintues at work.

I prefer to think that the people who live-blog American Idol are some type of quasi-damed soul serving out their time in purgatory.

Incidentally, after having a red-headed girlfriend for two years, I've come to regard all gingers as being bat-shit crazy. I tend to avoid them as well.

Spencer Carnage said...

Its nice to know someone read it, Jason. I have a feeling that will probably be the last time I do, with the exception for those Marvel anthologies because, well......people only seem to give a damn enough to comment on blogs when it involves the Big Two. And I am no exception to that rule most times.

I never dated a red head chick, but I did spend time with one in georgia for about a week. Probably the most level headed girl I have ever had the pleasure to meet. But yeah, the rest of the gingers? Round 'em up and burn 'em!

Jason said...

Did you see the Marvel indie antho that was previewed on ? That looks pretty cool.

I often have a hard time with anthologies since by design they are largely hit or miss, so I generally only buy the budget-priced models. I have a hard time buying anything that features violence against puppies.

Jason said...

As you can tell, I suck at html.

Spencer Carnage said...

As a person that did a brief in professional HTML Coding(by hand!) I find your lack of proper coding not only disgusting, but quite possibly capable of spreading communism.

Now, that indie Marvel thing looks good. Its a shame its only 5 issues, but I'm sure it'll be a hit. Just don't know if it will be a Marvel Zombies type of hit.

Jason said...

God I hope it's not a Marvel Zombies size hit, then they'll run it into the ground and kill indie comics (as they're doing to Zombies in general). I actually wish they were doing it like DC did with the Bizarro HC's. I have both of them and they're a lot of fun, but I suppose more people will buy them in singles.

I'm having my four-year-old give me a refresher in HTML, hopefully I'll be up to snuff soon.

pachoob said...

man. simi valley must be BORING. move to sf. it's way funner. and by funner i mean drunker, with crazier punk rawk chixxxxx everywhere in sight.

Secret said...

Crazy punk rawk chixxxx? Ugh. Been there, done that, had to hide the pills and alcohol in order to make sure she didn't make good on her "I'm gonna kill myself because of you!" threats.

How about a nice bohemian girl? You know, kind of cute and outgoinging, but not too cute and outgoing to where I have to worry about her getting tre wasted on fernet shots and befriending everyone in the bar to my general annoyance.