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Wednesday, December 20, 2006

If Judd Winick had created Wonder Woman...

Instead of this:

She would look like this:

  • Instead of hailing from the Amazon Island of Themyscira, she would come from the Dressing Room of a Strip Club.

  • Instead of exuding power and love, she would exude perversion and lust.

  • Instead of wearing a star spangled freedom inspiring bikini and tiara, she would be wearing black lingerie and too much make up.

  • Instead of a lasso that forces those who become ensnared by it to tell the truth, she would wield a whip that paralyzes others by overloading the pleasure centers of their brain.

  • Instead of being revlaunched by Allan Heinberg and Jodi Picoult, she would be relaunched by Jim Balent.

  • Instead of fighting alongside the JLA, she would be trying to sleep with everyone in the DCU.

And yes, she would totally be into "da butt."


Marc Burkhardt said...


What comic did you pick THAT up from?

Spencer Carnage said...

New Warriors # 4 & 14. It has nothing to do with Judd Winick, but I imagine that she would make a good stand in for a Winick created WW.

Marionette said...

This was the best you could do?

You want to take a cheap shot at Judd Winick and all you could come up with was a kind of poor man's Frank Millar with extra fetish?

I'm so disappointed.

2/10 Must try harder.

Spencer Carnage said...

What? I said she likes anal. What more do you want? And I wasn't the one who came up with the Poor Man's Frank Miller. I believe Judd Winick did that, hence the reason for the post.

Marionette said...

I was just disappointed. The cut price Frank Miller riff is one of his lesser things. There's so many better ways to stick the knife in. Look him up on Ragnell's blog (or mine) for further inspiration.

One thing I don't see him doing, though, is such a wholesale reinvention of the character. While he might reinterpret her to suit whatever agenda he was pushing (see current Shazam series), he wouldn't completely ignore the backstory (though he might get the details wrong due to sloppy research).

Plus he generally prefers depowering and dropping female characters from a great height as motivation for his male characters, so I can't really see him taking on Wonder Woman.


Spencer Carnage said...

I have read both blogs, which is where educated, thoughtful critiques of Winnick's writing belong. Here? We make jokes about wonder woman being into anal. I believe that was the whole reason for the post, actually. Thanks for stopping by!