Since I fucked up my end of the deal with this Barry Windsor-Smith Appreciation Week, I present you with Warren Ellis' Ruins with my deepest apologies. Its all kinds of wonderful.Ruins # 1
Ruins # 2

I am so damn jealous right now. Chris does a post about the Marvel Roleplaying Game over at 2 Guys Buying Comics and who else, but Jeff Grubb, the guy who designed the game, comes over and comments. Not only does he comment, he even says he's been lurking there for a month! Chris didn't even play the Marvel Roleplaying Game, but some Ultimate/Diet version of it. No one reading this gives two damns, but Jeff Grubb is awesome. Why? Because he give this little nerdy kid a means to explore his imagination like nobody else could. Say what you want about roleplaying games, but just remember that you're here because you read comics and comics are for nerds. You want to get all tough guy about comics, take that wanna-be macho shit to Listen To Us, We're Right where the usage of idiotic acronyms reign supreme. Here, we talk about the New Warriors, Racist X-men, G.I. Joes, Faux molestations by Silver Age comics, Alan Moore's John Ratsatine, Barry Windsor-Smith, and the gat damn Starman.
When I was growing up comics were these little magazines in which the covers exploded from the stands at you with action, drama, excitement and humor. Inside, it only got better. With the Marvel Super Hero Roleplaying game, I had every opportunity to create my own super hero story with whoever the hell I wanted. Curious to see who would win in a fight against Thor and Silver Surfer? Roll some dice and find out. (Silver Surfer. Sorry, but he's got the Power Cosmic.) If the Masters Of Evil attacked the X-men, could they take them, or would the Avengers need to come in and clean house? (Yay right, the Masters Of Evil are puss.) Even though all these scenarios are a bit campy and ill-thought out, they allowed for kids like myself to use the one of the only things we could call our own: imagination. While writers and artists created new and exhilirating worlds on paper, Jeff Grubb gave us the chance to ours on our table tops and in our heads. Even though the level of story telling may never have been all that deep or complex, we did get a chance to knock some heads while talking smack like only kids can do.
The streets of Marvel New York be dangerous. Its bad enough that there's your usual sort of criminals that are there to mug, rape, rob, steal, kill, and abuse you. Add totally heinous super villians with names like "The Beetle" and "Stilt-Man" to the picture and walking to the bodega down the street seems like suicide. Let's give thanks and praise to the cocktail of Gamma Omega Alpha Mutagenic whatever-you-want-to-call-it and tragic loss that is the gateway drug to the addiction of vengeance and justice. Had not Peter Parker been both bitten and indirectly responsible for the death of his Uncle Ben, half the populace of New York would be dead right now. If Matt Murdock was not accidentally blinded with some glowing goop that enhanced ALL! HIS! OTHER! SENSES!, would he be able to keep the streets of Hell's Kitchen safe by punishing all criminals everywhere to make up for the death of his father? If the X-men had not been both blessed and cursed with the X-factor that gives them their mutant powers, could they still appeal to the whiny little cry baby liberal in all of us by championing the rights of the oppressed as well as they do now? It is these events that play out like a Shakespearean tragedy that allow for us to say "Hey. If I was present when that lab experiment went wrong, giving me super human strength and the ability to grow quills, it would be no problem for me to combine those newfound powers along with my sarcastic wit to rock-a-shock a criminals face in." All you need is the proper motivation and you are officially Punch-You-With-A-Fist-Full-Of-Quills-Man.
Taking a cue from the O.G. black super hero, Night Thrasher came correct. Sporting greyish-purple pants, brown boots, a black long sleeve turtle neck(with the sleeves rolled up), mother-fuggin' yellow suspenders, and a gat damn cross earing, Dwayne Taylor was pimpin'. Say what you want about the get up, but if you remember back to 1990, you were just months away from wearing your jordache jeans backwards and still trying to convince your friends that Bell Biv Devoe was da bomb. Not Dwayne Taylor! He was cutting edge and kicking ass, two things that the New Warriors excelled at. Before the magnesium flares, ninja caltrops, wrist blade, and heelflips, Night Thrasher was sneaking around on rooftops and catwalks, busting the faces of thugs everywhere. Korean gangs called him "Chan Park Kwoon So Kichi Dak" which was fake-Korean for "crap, I'm gonna get my chest kicked in" guy.
Like any War On Crime, you're gonna need soldiers. Batman has Alfred and Robin. The Punisher turned to Microchip. Night Thrasher had the brother and sister combo of Midnight's Fire and Silhouette.
Cue various different snorts and giggles from the Peanuts gallery. Say what you will, but these two kids will mess you up. Midnight's Fire is all super strong and fast and Silhouette, well......all that tragedy is like an aphrodisiac and Sil and Thrash be getting it on like dogs in heat. However, the happiness is short lived.
A bust is underway. The fuzz show up. Midnight's Fire makes a hard decision about killing a cop. Dwayne stops him. Silhouette gets shot all the 'eff up in the ensuing melee.
Silhouette gets wacked while some punk calls her "baby." That's cold. Blaming Night Thrasher for his sister's death, Midnight's Fire lets the fury fly.
You see that? That shit's for life. Pay attention because there's going to be a quiz on this later.
Present day, someone's been killing folks in Korea Town again. Well, who could it be? One flashback later, Dwayne is on the case.
Not even Batman could solve a crime that fast. Now that you have your very own super hero team, let's take it to the streets and show them how its done. But first, let's have an interlude!
Hey, that's the company that was accidentally responsible for that whole Terrax debacle last issue. What are they up to? And who is this guy that's a real mad thinker? Vague....
And we're back. Trying to find some perps to beat up, the New Warriors give us a lesson in how to draw out some thugs.
Light the place up--!
Wait for the bad guys to show up--!
Stand in awe at the Bad Guy's fashion sense--!
Freak out when his friends come with A.I.M weaponry--!
Remember how I said that the streets of Marvel New York are dangerous? You can't spell "dangerous" without the word "dang" and that's what the New Warriors are thinking right now when they see these stolen A.I.M. guns. Speaking of A.I.M., they should change their name. Advanced Idea Mechanics just doesn't sound sinister enough. Advanced Idea Mechanics conjures up the idea that they are all about curing cancer and terraforming Mars to make it hospitable for the elderly. No, they should be called W.A.R. Weapons Are Radical, because that's all they do. They make weapons. And this case is no exception. However, when you're going up against the likes of KID NOVA! FIRESTAR! MARVEL BOY! SPEEDBALL! and NAMORITA! you're pretty much screwed, dude.

What about Night Thrasher? What's he up to? He's getting the crap kicked out of him, that's what he's up to! Have no fear, true believers! Just when its about to get real ugly, Night Thrasher summons up some of that Shakespearean tragedy that we talked about earlier to get the upper hand. See, Midnight's Fire's tragedy ain't nothing compared to Night Thrasher's tragedy. Sure, Midnight's Fire's sister was killed, blah blah blah, but Thrash lost his parents AND Midnight's Fire's sister who he was giving it to. You're sad for Night Thrasher right now. Its ok though, homeboy will come through.
With that inner turmoil comes the berzerker rage. Unleashing an armada of attack all over Midnight's Fire's face, your sadness is now turning into worry. Will Night Thrasher do it? Will he cross the line of no return? Will he think the unthinkable? Right when all hope is lost and Thrasher is about to do the deed, in comes Silhouette. Wait a second! Isn't she dead? No. Not dead. Crippled.
Snapping to his senses, Night Thrasher realizes the error in his ways. Dwayne's ashamed that he almost came this close to becoming the scum that he has vowed his life to fight. No matter how bad the crime is, you can't just go around killing everyone. There's a due process. We have laws. And even when though those laws allow for the dregs of society to slip through the cracks, we have super heroes like the New Warriors here to pick up the slack. You can't just KILL people because they wronged you. Take his ass to jail!
Still......there is that matter of Street Justice that must be attended to.
The important thing to remember about Street Justice is that it goes back to the days of Mesopotamia. You know, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, all that good stuff? Now that Night Thrasher has Midnight's Fire right where he wants him, what is going to do next? See, I told you there was going to be a test..
Oh, snap! Game over, man. Your thuggish ruggish days are done. Not only do the folks in Korea Town that were paying you to protect them think that you're a punk ass biz-natch, but you look all stupid, too. Maybe you can call up Madame Hydra and you two can talk about what's the best cover up to use for a messed up scar like that. If only this was the 80's, you could probably get a job as an extra in an action movie like Commando or Rambo where you play "paramilitary drug lord goon # 3". Nope. Its the 90's and the last good action movie that came out was in 1988 called Above The Law. With some luck, maybe Mario Van Pebbles' will have a straight-to-video movie that you can cameo in.......nerd.
When all is said and done, the New Warriors are a bit concerned. Leader guy just went psycho. Nova is still all pissed about being tossed off a building. He had an ongoing series way before Night Thrasher was a gleam in Fabian Nicenza's eyes. Its time for some words!
Doooooood. The guy who is in charge is also the loose cannon on the team? Fraaaaaaag. And that's why they're the Heroes For The 90's--!
Respect!














What they shoulda done is had each "fan" send in a picture of their feet in addition to the entry fee. That way Rob could see what they look like and, god willing, someday learn how to draw one.Chris from 2 Guys Buying Comics and Jake from Ye Olde Comic Booke Blogge show us what Marvel Previews In Hell would look like:
WOLVERINE/SPIDER-MAN: OVEREXPOSURE #5 (of 8)Dave Campbell risks judgement from The Inter-Planetary Supreme Court for crimes against comic books. The defendant? You're "ironic" love for Power Man and Iron Fist:
Written by PAUL JENKINS
Pencils & Cover by JIM LEE
James Howlett has been many things --- samurai, secret agent, X-Man, software reseller, administrative assistant, driving instructor, plot device. But his job as a one-hour-photo developer proves to be his most challenging yet, when Daily Bugle shutterbug Peter Parker "swings" by for help with a tricky roll of film! Petey's no slouch with a negative, but Logan's the Best At What He Does --- something's gotta give! The most overprinted miniseries of the year rolls along!
32 PGS./Rated T+ SUGGESTED FOR TEENS AND UP ...$2.99
Allow me to engage in a little bit of comic sacrilege: I have never been a big fan of Power Man and Iron Fist.BeaucoupKevin gives the fans what they want
“Sweet Christmas!” you say, gasping. “But they’re so retro! Not only do I dig Power Man and Iron Fist, but I ‘get’ them in that ironic way that makes me cool.”
But now, Tony's sober, and when Stane blows up a couple of his friends for kicks, Tony decides that he's had enough... and he goes to the basement.Mark Fossen makes me feel dumb for not going to the comic shop this week:
See, when other super-heroes like, say, your Ultimate Spider-Man types go to the basement for an hour, they're going to come out with puffy eyes and an empty box of Kleenex. But when Tony Stark goes to the basement, he's coming out with a brand new pair of Nuclear-Powered Underpants.
That's right.
Nuclear-Powered Underpants. No man can stand against their fury.
Another Friday, another installment of Bovine Ultraviolence."Cut the crap, Johns":
8. Enough with the veneration of Golden Age Lois. Some of us, you know, have actually read the stories she appears and know full well that she was a vicious emasculating witch. I will believe a man can fly; I will not believe that Lois's poop don't stink.
Friday is here and already I'm bracing for another weekend-less weekend. Tonight is my friend Sam's art show, The Matterhorn. He's the fellow in which the ages of 19 to 22, we hung out doing stuff like skateboarding, starting up crappy bands, thrift store shopping, arguing about vegetarian lifestyles, and listening to an assortment of hardcore, emo, and indie rock records. Now that I'm a few months shy from turning 27, our time is spent drinking beers(Sam's a lightweight) and talking about his new movie that I'm going to sell my left pectoral muscle to produce. A sidenote on the subject of movies, some of Sam's art shows up in Art School Confidential, which earns me some kind of scene points if only for the sole fact that there pictures on some digital camera out there some where with Sam and I innocently naked on it. The art show should be fun as there's been promises of powdered donuts and PBR. And its in Silverlake which means there will be hipsters of plenty to amuse and frustrate me while The Girlfriend gets rowdy drunk in a way that makes me both love and hate her at the same time. Its ok, because she's solely responsible for me having a copy of DC Universe: The Worlds Of Alan Moore. She tried to get me the Artic Monkeys and I was like, woah.
And let's not forget Barry Windsor Smith Appreciation Week! And what is that you ask? That's a good question, little Billy! Barry Windsor-Smith Appreciation Week is where we come together and give our love and thanks to the God that is known as Barry Windsor-Smith! A master of the craft, BWS(that's we call him) doesn't get as much credit as he deserves, so we have decided that we are going to dedicate the last week of March, Saturday to Friday, the 25th to the 31st, to praising the glory that his and his alone. What YOU can do is pick up BWS comic.......read it......AND BLOG ABOUT IT! You don't have to do it all week long, but hell, one post should do the trick! 


Oh, I could kiss that weird magic wielding comic writing limey bastard right now...
Thankfully, the Japanese are a nation of nerds and instead of creating robots of mass destruction, they are creating robots for your aiport secretarial needs.The very famous Japanese manga Gingatetsudo 999 or Galaxy Express 999 (on the same level as Captain Harlock (Albator)) featured Me-Teru as a hero, and here she is as a robotic receptionist at the airport of Kita-Kyushu (the home town of the manga-ka of this series, Matsumoto-San). this Me-Teru robot measures 1m70 and can respond to 200 airport releated questions.[via Engadget.com]
Yes, that's right! Barry Windsor-Smith Appreciation Week, which takes place during the final week of March, Saturday to Friday, the 25th to the 31st. Everyone who is anyone in comic book blogging must pay their respects the creative works of the British artist at least once for BWS's unforgetable and groundbreaking work in the field of comics. Whether it was launching the original Conan The Barbarian with Roy Thomas, writing and illustrating Weapon X in the pages of Marvel Comics Presents, or exploring his own creations(along with paying homage to the work of Jack Kirby) in the over-sized Barry Windsor-Smith: Storyteller, BWS's work is nothing short of brilliant. BWS was simply thee best at adding a real sense of beauty and grace to the world of swords, super powers and science fiction.
- Comics Should Be Good digging up some urban legend about BWS being the reincarnated soul of Aflons Mucha